The three words "I Love You"

[Laurie]

I've been with my boyfriend for about two years now. We have had our ups and downs but the relationship is mainly good.

 

However, I'm a bit concerned about something. He has never said I love you to me. I have said the words to him a few times but he never did. Do you think it's normal?

[Tony T]

If he hasn't said them because he doesn't love you, I think you're in a pretty lopsided relationship. If he hasn't said those words because he is shy, scared or otherwise uncommunicative when it comes to feelings, things can squeak by for a while. But it's not good for someone not to be able to express how they feel after that amount of time.

 

If there aren't some very clear indicators, such as his actions, that clearly show he is exceptionally fond of you at this time, I think you need to make a serious review of your participation in this duo.

 

I am shocked that after this amount of time you don't have a better pulse on your relationship.

[Deejette]

I to have had experience with a guy who showed me in every way that he cared about me, but just couldn't say the three little words, "I love you." He had never been told at any time in his childhood by parents, relatives, or friends, that he was loved. The word love was just not part of his vocabulary.

 

I accepted it because he demonstrated love and affection, caring and thoughtfulness. He somehow felt that words were not what count. That actions prove love. That anyone can say they love someone, but it is how they act that proves it out.

 

It is satisfying to hear that someone loves us. Unforturtunately, the men who were the quickest to tell me they loved me, were also the biggest BS-artists. So in some ways I almost welcomed the straightforwardness of my verbally cold boyfriend.

If he hasn't said them because he doesn't love you, I think you're in a pretty lopsided relationship. If he hasn't said those words because he is shy, scared or otherwise uncommunicative when it comes to feelings, things can squeak by for a while. But it's not good for someone not to be able to express how they feel after that amount of time. If there aren't some very clear indicators, such as his actions, that clearly show he is exceptionally fond of you at this time, I think you need to make a serious review of your participation in this duo. I am shocked that after this amount of time you don't have a better pulse on your relationship.