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Loving Friendship. Does it stand a chance?


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Hello all :)

 

I've been a secret lurker and admirer of this forum for a while, and I've decided to take the plunge and ask for advice concerning a great relationship I have formed with a woman. I'll try and keep this all quite short, but here we go...

 

I being a gay woman, met an amazing bi-sexual woman around April this year by a complete twist of fate and a little chance thrown in. From the get go, the moment we laid eyes on eachother etc there was an instant chemistry. Over the time we've got to know eachother I simply cannot explain the amazing connection we have with one another. Its deep, spiritual, almost magical and I couldn't be happier with the knowledge that we make eachother happy. Everyone who sees us together comments on how happy we are. We've kissed and even exhanged 'I love you's' etc...

 

Although there is a little problem in all this magic (as always with relationships)...I expressed that I had hoped we'd enter a relationship and become something more than friends in the future about two months ago...Her response was something I had dreaded as she explained she was extremely attacted to me in both a physical and emotional sense, but feels as though she is a bi-sexual more inclined towards men. She also declared that it was probable she'd crave men in the future and didn't want to hurt me (which sounds like a poor excuse in my opinion). As for a bit of background, she is quite mixed up emotionally due to a bad break up not so long ago and other emotional hurts she has discussed with me in confidence. I appreciated her up-front honesty, and decided to remain her friend because I just love her as a person, and the connection we have is very strong (she acknowledges this too).

 

But as time has progressed, we've become even closer than before (I guess its because she feels a little uninhibited) and its becoming obvious that she has ambivalent feelings about me. I bring up the fact that I am seeing other people and she just remains quiet whilst I explain such activities. I really see a great future for us romantically, but at the moment it might not be right. Do you think there is anything I can do to change the dynamic of this relationship to feel a little more...romantic? I want to make her fall in love with me more than she does right now. Its as though she is comfortable with the arrangement we have as friends and doesn't seem to want to progress things as she gets attention/love without commitment and drama :confused: Any help would be greatly appreciated! :)

Edited by cuivienen
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