Who Can Figure This Out ?

[bluegreen]

Its been while since I been here so

I hope All of you are doing OK in your lives and relationships?

 

I will try to keep this short clear and to a point Skype experts might even figure this one easy :

I found on my old Skype account I gave my s/o to use

number of his "ex" as contact just a number to send sms to nothing more.

Its registered to state and current city she lives in right now but it was already blocked when I found it.

And that's "last" thing that shows up for 3 month's history time on skype she is also blocked on his FB and e mails.

 

I was and still am livid He swears up and down he did not put it there well it did not just appear there did it now honey bunch did it ?

I got into account there is no purchase history made for SMS, or Calling, at all no conversation history either but maybe you can't see that from any computer but his own.

 

I nicely contacted her on FB no insults or argument at all told her who I was and showed her log of her being blocked.

And invited her to check my FB and his presence told her if he was being dog neither she not I deserved to be in that situation she did not respond for a week or so then just proceeded to block me.

 

 

 

So any idea how long that number might have been on why did she blocked me just like that and no word back is that admitting of guilt ?

How did that number got on was it on for day only or last three month's.

And how did they even talk without any credit at all being added in that time or last half a year actually never being added.

I have another nasty suspicion but will reveal it later and I truly appreciate your help ...

[cerridwen]

 

So any idea how long that number might have been on why did she blocked me just like that and no word back is that admitting of guilt ?

How did that number got on was it on for day only or last three month's.

And how did they even talk without any credit at all being added in that time or last half a year actually never being added.

I have another nasty suspicion but will reveal it later and I truly appreciate your help ...

 

That's not admitting guilt; that's her admitting she doesn't want drama.

I would have blocked you too even though I'd have nothing to hide.

Edited December 4, 2012 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[bluegreen]

TX to @moderator its appreciated ....

[aussietigerwolf]

Its been while since I been here so

I hope All of you are doing OK in your lives and relationships?

 

I will try to keep this short clear and to a point Skype experts might even figure this one easy :

I found on my old Skype account I gave my s/o to use

number of his "ex" as contact just a number to send sms to nothing more.

Its registered to state and current city she lives in right now but it was already blocked when I found it.

And that's "last" thing that shows up for 3 month's history time on skype she is also blocked on his FB and e mails.

 

I was and still am livid He swears up and down he did not put it there well it did not just appear there did it now honey bunch did it ?

I got into account there is no purchase history made for SMS, or Calling, at all no conversation history either but maybe you can't see that from any computer but his own.

 

I nicely contacted her on FB no insults or argument at all told her who I was and showed her log of her being blocked.

And invited her to check my FB and his presence told her if he was being dog neither she not I deserved to be in that situation she did not respond for a week or so then just proceeded to block me.

 

 

 

So any idea how long that number might have been on why did she blocked me just like that and no word back is that admitting of guilt ?

How did that number got on was it on for day only or last three month's.

And how did they even talk without any credit at all being added in that time or last half a year actually never being added.

I have another nasty suspicion but will reveal it later and I truly appreciate your help ...

 

 

What did you say in the message?

[bluegreen]

Am sorry what did I say to whom ?

[Million.to.1]

This seems a little paranoid in my opinion.

If i were your BF, i would be very angry at you for contacting my Ex. How embarrassing.

 

I don't even understand why you are worried. It's nothing. she's blocked. who cares!

[HeavenOrHell]

What's the actual problem here? That his ex is still on his skype buddy list?

 

So what if she is, I'm friends with my ex and always will be, I still care about him as a friend, he still comes over for dinner, my partner talks online regularly to his ex and on the phone sometimes, I don't know when or how often, I've not asked, I don't care, he's with me, loves me, and I trust him. I've no need to ask him to stop having contact with her. If two people still get on as friends, then they shouldn't have to stop that friendship, you need trust in a relationship or it won't work.

 

I'm not surprised his ex blocked you, you came across as obsessive/paranoid to her.

 

If you have any actual reason to not trust your partner, and it can't be worked through then why stay with him? But if he's done nothing to make you feel like this then you need to learn to trust him and learn to curb your insecurities.

 

 

 

Its been while since I been here so

I hope All of you are doing OK in your lives and relationships?

 

I will try to keep this short clear and to a point Skype experts might even figure this one easy :

I found on my old Skype account I gave my s/o to use

number of his "ex" as contact just a number to send sms to nothing more.

Its registered to state and current city she lives in right now but it was already blocked when I found it.

And that's "last" thing that shows up for 3 month's history time on skype she is also blocked on his FB and e mails.

 

I was and still am livid He swears up and down he did not put it there well it did not just appear there did it now honey bunch did it ?

I got into account there is no purchase history made for SMS, or Calling, at all no conversation history either but maybe you can't see that from any computer but his own.

 

I nicely contacted her on FB no insults or argument at all told her who I was and showed her log of her being blocked.

And invited her to check my FB and his presence told her if he was being dog neither she not I deserved to be in that situation she did not respond for a week or so then just proceeded to block me.

 

 

 

So any idea how long that number might have been on why did she blocked me just like that and no word back is that admitting of guilt ?

How did that number got on was it on for day only or last three month's.

And how did they even talk without any credit at all being added in that time or last half a year actually never being added.

I have another nasty suspicion but will reveal it later and I truly appreciate your help ...

[bluegreen]

What's the actual problem here? That his ex is still on his skype buddy list?

 

So what if she is, I'm friends with my ex and always will be, I still care about him as a friend, he still comes over for dinner, my partner talks online regularly to his ex and on the phone sometimes, I don't know when or how often, I've not asked, I don't care, he's with me, loves me, and I trust him. I've no need to ask him to stop having contact with her. If two people still get on as friends, then they shouldn't have to stop that friendship, you need trust in a relationship or it won't work.

 

I'm not surprised his ex blocked you, you came across as obsessive/paranoid to her.

 

If you have any actual reason to not trust your partner, and it can't be worked through then why stay with him? But if he's done nothing to make you feel like this then you need to learn to trust him and learn to curb your insecurities.

 

 

Even if he did it added her on behind my back and hid it from me he knows that their history bothered me a lot he knows exactly why is that.

I might be impulsive temperamental little fire cracker but no one is Innocent by hiding and doing things behind their s/o back.

 

You guys are right its really hard to give up what one has worked so hard to keep and cared for so much but in the end that seems like only solution ...

[HeavenOrHell]

Why does their history bother you? It's history

Has he ever given you reason to not trust him?

Maybe he still wants to be friends with her and didn't tell you as he knew you would take it the wrong way.

Ex's are ex's for a reason, he's with you now.

 

 

Even if he did it added her on behind my back and hid it from me he knows that their history bothered me a lot he knows exactly why is that.

I might be impulsive temperamental little fire cracker but no one is Innocent by hiding and doing things behind their s/o back.

 

You guys are right its really hard to give up what one has worked so hard to keep and cared for so much but in the end that seems like only solution ...

[justwhoiam]

Hi bluegreen, I've been using Skype for many years, so I think I know a thing or two.

 

Here below I will tell you what I think:

 

1. You can block and unblock anyone whenever you want.

 

2. If you log into your Skype account from a different computer or device, you won't get any history on the "new" device, unless the account is open on the other end too, or the other contact is logged in. So in your case: she was blocked and he was not logged in = you get no history. Maybe, if you had unblocked her and left it on for a few days, you would have got(ten) some recent history. But you were impulsive.

 

3. My point #2 is how it's always worked with Skype. But now there's a brand new feature, that was released this year, not long ago, and it is that you can decide if you want to store your history on the Skype server. That way, I guess, you would get all the history on any device, starting from day one, when you tell skype that you want the history saved on their server. As this is quite brand new, I haven't had any chance to see how it works really.

 

4. He added her contact after you gave that account access to him, after you were already together and after he was over with his (ex) gf. Guys can be a little slow, sorry to say this, but he knew you could log into that account whenever, so I guess he wouldn't do anything wrong knowing that you can read everything... On the other hand, he might guess you can't read his history anyway, but I say, in doubt, he wouldn't risk it.

 

5. You got mad at him, but you wanted more proof and inform the other girl involved. But it seems you came across as too aggressive. People in here accused you of being paranoid, but I know where you're coming from (figuratively speaking) and I would have done something different, which most people won't like. First of all, next time, don't be so impulsive; when you act on impulse, your brain can't work properly, so think things out in a better way. I would have tried to open a new account and contact her through it, not letting her know it was you. If she has a block on new contacts, then I would have contacted her through his account, but saying it's you-fill-in-the-name (Samantha, Rhonda, Julie, whatever) and that you had an interest in him and he asked you out, and wanted to know if they are still having some romantic connection, etc. After that and depending on her answers, I would get my own opinion on everything. And probably, despite being a bit bothered about adding her name behind my back, things would have turned out well, with no need of getting mad at him. Another option was waiting for him to unblock her, if ever.

 

Anyway, now you blew it. Calm down. Do you think he will change his password after this? I guess if he does, you'll blow it out of proportion... understandably. Aren't you moving where he is next year? Hold out.

Edited December 4, 2012 by justwhoiam

[bluegreen]

Its bit complicated but lets say they almost got hitched she was really head over heals for him and he knew that then he met me and .....

Well yes he did he is huge humongous flirt and loves attention he slipped once already.

Guy should have been born in time of sheik's and harem houris he has more girl buddies than I can count and they all love him to pieces.

Even if he is not doing anything out of malice or would not cheat again fact that he lies and hides stuff like that its unforgivable you don't do to someone what you don't want to be done to you.

Presented like this it does seem silly and ridiculous but its not without reason.

 

Gosh its hard to explain how does it feel finding your s/o doing something that you and him to knows they should not do or was agreed not to be done.

[bluegreen]

Hi bluegreen, I've been using Skype for many years, so I think I know a thing or two.

 

Here below I will tell you what I think:

 

1. You can block and unblock anyone whenever you want.

 

2. If you log into your Skype account from a different computer or device, you won't get any history on the "new" device, unless the account is open on the other end too, or the other contact is logged in. So in your case: she was blocked and he was not logged in = you get no history. Maybe, if you had unblocked her and left it on for a few days, you would have got(ten) some recent history. But you were impulsive.

 

3. My point #2 is how it's always worked with Skype. But now there's a brand new feature, that was released this year, not long ago, and it is that you can decide if you want to store your history on the Skype server. That way, I guess, you would get all the history on any device, starting from day one, when you tell skype that you want the history saved on their server. As this is quite brand new, I haven't had any chance to see how it works really.

 

4. He added her contact after you gave that account access to him, after you were already together and after he was over with his (ex) gf. Guys can be a little slow, sorry to say this, but he knew you could log into that account whenever, so I guess he wouldn't do anything wrong knowing that you can read everything... On the other hand, he might guess you can't read his history anyway, but I say, in doubt, he wouldn't risk it.

 

5. You got mad at him, but you wanted more proof and inform the other girl involved. But it seems you came across as too aggressive. People in here accused you of being paranoid, but I know where you're coming from (figuratively speaking) and I would have done something different, which most people won't like. First of all, next time, don't be so impulsive; when you act on impulse, your brain can't work properly, so think things out in a better way. I would have tried to open a new account and contact her through it, not letting her know it was you. If she has a block on new contacts, then I would have contacted her through his account, but saying it's you-fill-in-the-name (Samantha, Rhonda, Julie, whatever) and that you had an interest in him and he asked you out, and wanted to know if they are still having some romantic connection, etc. After that and depending on her answers, I would get my own opinion on everything. And probably, despite being a bit bothered about adding her name behind my back, things would have turned out well, with no need of getting mad at him. Another option was waiting for him to unblock her, if ever.

 

Anyway, now you blew it. Calm down. Do you think he will change his password after this? I guess if he does, you'll blow it out of proportion... understandably. Aren't you moving where he is next year? Hold out.

 

 

Hi : ) lovely to hear from you wish it was under better circumstances.

Now that I read trough it maybe its better if I did not see "history" I just might have strangled him.

 

but its sitting in my tummy like little bitter pill that just won't get dissolved.

Am pretty sure she was deleted and blocked cause She was not on a list when I saw it at all but I found it in area where you add name then blocked it.

 

No she is not the type to go for that I know every girl thinks that ex is synonym for s.... but this one is that in real sense of the word worse yet she presents herself as Christian thumps bible all day but will take her clothes off in front of camera in a blink of an eye.( inside info )

 

 

So you are right I am boiling mad and don't think this can be fixed

how could I know how long he sms-ed her why how many times has he blocked her then added her what for?

 

What happened with purchase history and so on so many questions but no answer at all in sight and if I got them would I be able to take it I think not.

 

Knowing her loose morals and how bad she wanted him not that he is Innocent here whole thing stinks to high heaven and of course he would rather be boiled now then admit anything ...

[justwhoiam]

Nice to read from you again too

 

Why are you insisting on him texting her and using credit?

 

1) Some email accounts let you text for free.

2) They could have just talked on skype, which is free.

3) If he has an account with his mobile service provider, any number he calls or texts with is logged; usually, only the first part of the number is visible, but enough to get whose number it is, I guess.

4) You need to calm down a bit now and think straight.

5) Others already said you already won. And it's no race, anyway.

[bluegreen]

Nice to read from you again too

 

Why are you insisting on him texting her and using credit?

 

1) Some email accounts let you text for free.

2) They could have just talked on skype, which is free.

3) If he has an account with his mobile service provider, any number he calls or texts with is logged; usually, only the first part of the number is visible, but enough to get whose number it is, I guess.

4) You need to calm down a bit now and think straight.

5) Others already said you already won. And it's no race, anyway.

 

 

 

Hm true

Not sure cause only option I saw was to "send" sms you need to buy credit option not regular like contact you can type chat to or with you could only send sms that's it.

Her contact on list was mobile phone number that's it.

 

Wanna tell me what did i won cause I sure like sound of that he is with me yeah but possibly getting cheap Skype trill's from her what a prize eh.

 

I am trying to honest but failing miserably maybe its just to soon ....

[HeavenOrHell]

If you have good reason to think he's cheating on you, or know that he has, why stay with him?

 

I don't see the point in a r/ship where you're constantly feeling suspicious and looking for signs he's cheating, it's unhealthy. It's not the sort of r/ship I'd want to be part of.

 

I've never snooped around my partner's computer and personal stuff, I've no need to. He has plenty of female friends, but they're friends, it's me he wants to be with.

 

If you don't trust him, but he's done nothing wrong then leave him as it's not fair on him.

 

And if he's not trustworthy then leave him.

 

 

Hi : ) lovely to hear from you wish it was under better circumstances.

Now that I read trough it maybe its better if I did not see "history" I just might have strangled him.

 

but its sitting in my tummy like little bitter pill that just won't get dissolved.

Am pretty sure she was deleted and blocked cause She was not on a list when I saw it at all but I found it in area where you add name then blocked it.

 

No she is not the type to go for that I know every girl thinks that ex is synonym for s.... but this one is that in real sense of the word worse yet she presents herself as Christian thumps bible all day but will take her clothes off in front of camera in a blink of an eye.( inside info )

 

 

So you are right I am boiling mad and don't think this can be fixed

how could I know how long he sms-ed her why how many times has he blocked her then added her what for?

 

What happened with purchase history and so on so many questions but no answer at all in sight and if I got them would I be able to take it I think not.

 

Knowing her loose morals and how bad she wanted him not that he is Innocent here whole thing stinks to high heaven and of course he would rather be boiled now then admit anything ...

[justwhoiam]

Hm true

Not sure cause only option I saw was to "send" sms you need to buy credit option not regular like contact you can type chat to or with you could only send sms that's it.

Her contact on list was mobile phone number that's it.

 

Wanna tell me what did i won cause I sure like sound of that he is with me yeah but possibly getting cheap Skype trill's from her what a prize eh.

 

I am trying to honest but failing miserably maybe its just to soon ....

I'm not sure what you're talking about, in my skype I have the sms option too, it's standard. Don't you see it when you log into your own account? You can't text if you don't buy credit. Full stop.

 

About her account showing her mobile, it was her choice. Maybe she has skype contacts calling her. That can be useful when she's not logged in and someone wants to talk to her anyway. But then again, you either need credit to call a mobile from Skype or a paying subscription, or you can call the number with your own phone line (mobile, or landline).

 

You know what I meant by "winning"... but hey, you can always give the prize away...

 

@HeavenOrHell: Some people don't even mind having their partner f by someone else, but that doesn't mean it works fine for just anybody. That is not the norm as you would think. So you can be fine with your partner talking to a woman at 2 am for 3 hours, you are not interested in knowing, but most women would be. Trust is essential, and I agree on that, but showing total indifference to whom he speaks to wouldn't be me, or bluegreen either. So to each one their own. Every relationship has its own dynamics.

[HeavenOrHell]

But if a person is snooping trying to find out who their partner is in contact with then there's clearly no trust there, it means he's cheated before and she can't trust him, or he's not cheated and she is still insecure, so she has her own issues to deal with, either way there is no point in a r/ship where there's no trust, snooping around is not a sign of a healthy r/ship.

 

 

 

I'm not sure what you're talking about, in my skype I have the sms option too, it's standard. Don't you see it when you log into your own account? You can't text if you don't buy credit. Full stop.

 

About her account showing her mobile, it was her choice. Maybe she has skype contacts calling her. That can be useful when she's not logged in and someone wants to talk to her anyway. But then again, you either need credit to call a mobile from Skype or a paying subscription, or you can call the number with your own phone line (mobile, or landline).

 

You know what I meant by "winning"... but hey, you can always give the prize away...

 

@HeavenOrHell: Some people don't even mind having their partner f by someone else, but that doesn't mean it works fine for just anybody. That is not the norm as you would think. So you can be fine with your partner talking to a woman at 2 am for 3 hours, you are not interested in knowing, but most women would be. Trust is essential, and I agree on that, but showing total indifference to whom he speaks to wouldn't be me, or bluegreen either. So to each one their own. Every relationship has its own dynamics.

[blugirl]

Wish I could help you but I dont even understand what's your problem, your sentences are so gramatically chaotic, I just dont understand what you mean.... English isn't your first language, is it?

[justwhoiam]

But if a person is snooping trying to find out who their partner is in contact with then there's clearly no trust there, it means he's cheated before and she can't trust him, or he's not cheated and she is still insecure, so she has her own issues to deal with, either way there is no point in a r/ship where there's no trust, snooping around is not a sign of a healthy r/ship.

I can partly agree with you on this. It also depends on which way you look at it.

 

It's not that she was systematically opening that account. She opened it after months, for whatever reason. I'm putting myself in her shoes here. If I gave an account to him, maybe it's our account, not just his? I'm not sure what their agreement was, but I've been knowing brother and sister sharing one skype account for years. They just had one computer at home, so that sort of explains it. Ok, this is not the case here. Anyway, one day I might decide to open it to see how his list has grown, adding friends. Note that a LDR is not like a standard relationship where you can usually go out with your respective friends... so if you want to keep up with what's going on with someone's life, seeing how many friends he's in touch with or who his best friend is or what they're up to doesn't sound like a terrible thing. Also considering the time zone difference, the time spent together is best spent talking about other things. She didn't hack his account. This is one way to look at it.

 

Of course, trust is a must-have. But the other person shouldn't break the trust. Here he broke the trust by cheating. She forgave him I suppose. What's the point in loving someone and being jealous? If your question was easy to answer, there would be no more jealous people around. Think about it.

[HeavenOrHell]

I must've missed the bit where she said he cheated, this still doesn't mean it's right to snoop.

She's snooping as she doesn't trust him, this isn't healthy, no matter which way you look at it.

I've never felt the need to see who is on my partner's friend's list on skype or msn, he talks to male and female friends, (he's mentioned it in passing, and sometimes he'll say he spoke to his ex, he's nothing to hide, they're friends same as me and my ex are) *friends* being the operative word here.

If I really wanted to know who was on his list, (I don't really need to know) or what is going on with his life I would ask him, not go behind his back.

Time zone difference is irrelevant here.

Your last paragraph doesn't make sense.

 

Most of us will have insecurities to some extent, but this doesn't mean you should go snooping around, if a person has cheated then you need to sit down and talk about it and work out if you can trust him now, and if you can't, then get out of the r/ship.

 

 

I can partly agree with you on this. It also depends on which way you look at it.

 

It's not that she was systematically opening that account. She opened it after months, for whatever reason. I'm putting myself in her shoes here. If I gave an account to him, maybe it's our account, not just his? I'm not sure what their agreement was, but I've been knowing brother and sister sharing one skype account for years. They just had one computer at home, so that sort of explains it. Ok, this is not the case here. Anyway, one day I might decide to open it to see how his list has grown, adding friends. Note that a LDR is not like a standard relationship where you can usually go out with your respective friends... so if you want to keep up with what's going on with someone's life, seeing how many friends he's in touch with or who his best friend is or what they're up to doesn't sound like a terrible thing. Also considering the time zone difference, the time spent together is best spent talking about other things. She didn't hack his account. This is one way to look at it.

 

Of course, trust is a must-have. But the other person shouldn't break the trust. Here he broke the trust by cheating. She forgave him I suppose. What's the point in loving someone and being jealous? If your question was easy to answer, there would be no more jealous people around. Think about it.

[justwhoiam]

Your last paragraph doesn't make sense.

It does.

 

The message you are giving is:

1. you don't have to care about the people he talks to, plain and simple, it's none of your business

2. when you know about it, no need to be jealous because you need to trust him

3. if you have issues, leave him, it's some unhealthy relationship

4. either #3 or talk to him instead of snooping

 

To me, #4 can make sense, not the previous 3 points. I guess we just have different views.

[HeavenOrHell]

Yes, we have different views, my view is there is no need for snooping in a loving healthy relationship.

 

 

 

It does.

 

The message you are giving is:

1. you don't have to care about the people he talks to, plain and simple, it's none of your business

2. when you know about it, no need to be jealous because you need to trust him

3. if you have issues, leave him, it's some unhealthy relationship

4. either #3 or talk to him instead of snooping

 

To me, #4 can make sense, not the previous 3 points. I guess we just have different views.

[bluegreen]

Just who I am thank you doll for having my back you got me to tear up I'll appreciate it forever.

Am going to clarify few things here am somewhat of a mad scientist-artist type of person.When I get inspiration am mad or happy words flow under my fingertips jump one over another like a brook over stones.

 

You are also only one who paid enough attention to realize its true I did not "snoop" or hacked into that account it was mine in first place I had password for it and it was given to him for using.

 

Its like one of those you had to be there jokes I was also asked why

Am I even with him if this is what I think its happening well once I read somewhere that moon asked a lovely crying woman why did she not leave her beloved if he made her feel so low and she answered to him : Would you ever leave your sky?

 

That's how I felt about him that's how we all feel about them and why we are doing all this and are here in this place hope that answers it clear enough and good enough for those who want to know.

 

 

I have been on this earth long enough to know that it takes guts integrity and character to say things as they are be them ugly or lovely and very few people dare to do that but I dare.

I read posts about how someone would never do this do that but are they really that naive or think that we are no person EVER did not break one or few love rules so why lie about it?

 

Like peeking into a phone checking web history or going trough the pockets or already open e mail why because no sane person wants to be taken for fool and once they think they are as you said :

 

Either they do same thing as their s/o or simply are comfortable enough about that and plain don't care or have guts to confront the situation in case their s/o gets up and leave them so better close eyes and pretend all is lovely right

now am sure I'll hear howls of outrage.

 

 

 

 

"Yes that's just how she had her account contact so that people can call her and yes credit its needed I did not thought of home or calling from his mobile".

 

And last but not least I know that it will be about impossible to prove what happened there he will forever deny it because he knows what I will do but its already been done I left him.

Am also sure there will be some time before all contact stops between us but for time being this is how it is ...