movingon12 Posted December 15, 2012 Share Posted December 15, 2012 I know. We've all been there. I thought my first husband was The One. I couldn't imagine a life without him. When he cheated and we broke up I thought my life was over. I loved him with all my heart - he was my best friend, the only one I could talk to, the only one who understood me. He was going to be the father of my children, the man who I would be buried next to. And yeah he had his faults, but I would never love anyone as much as I love him NOW I look at a photo of him and think OH MY GOD WHAT WAS I THINKING?!?!!??!??!!? ARGH!!!!! Seven years I wasted with that twat. SEVEN YEARS. SEVEN. YEARS. WAS I MAD?!??! Why didn't I see how crap that relationship really was??? Why was I so blind??? You'll do the same thing. But you need time. Break ups are hard. They're really, really, hard. But just because you miss him does not mean you belong together. Beg, steal or borrow a book called: 'It's called a break up because it's broken' - I think it would really help you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author brokengirl3 Posted December 15, 2012 Author Share Posted December 15, 2012 i think i want to stay alone at the moment and focus on myself so as to improve me!i will try to find the book !thanks darling! Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted December 15, 2012 Share Posted December 15, 2012 First of all i would like to thank you for all the support!!I have news!We were talking for about 4 hrs !He said to me there is none in his life that he loves and all of this 12 days were a hell for him .He was asking questions to see my feelings and he tried to make me to saying that i still love him too but i didnt!I was cold turkey!Anyway i will go to NC again to see what he will do!!i can not accept him back easily !what do u think? What happened to his new girlfriend? Remember the saying: fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. NEVER TAKE BACK A CHEATER!!! Look, if you were married to him there may be room for reconciliation. You weren't though. NEVER take back a man who cheats on you when you are dating!!!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author brokengirl3 Posted January 10, 2013 Author Share Posted January 10, 2013 Back to NC DAY 5 again!!Did not work!He doesnt want me !Is nothing i can do! Link to post Share on other sites
Lasatra Posted January 10, 2013 Share Posted January 10, 2013 You could get so much better! You're very good looking so I don't know why you're still waiting for him!! Move on and live!! ;D Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted January 10, 2013 Share Posted January 10, 2013 Read the updated No Contact Guide in my thread. You have gone No Contact and that's absolutely brilliant - but it's a wonderful guide on how to keep going! You're doing great!! What language do you speak, as a first language, by the way? Your English is fine - I think I can safely say you probably speak English a lot better than some English people can! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jovan Posted January 10, 2013 Share Posted January 10, 2013 Just forget him, you seem like a really nice person, and he should be so lucky to call you up again. But just trust me, his not worth it. If he just dumped you for some1 else his not what you need nor your "soul-mate" case you would never do something like that to him. Even if he call's you be strong, and say no, case his not what you need, he will never appreciate you for the person you really are! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author brokengirl3 Posted January 11, 2013 Author Share Posted January 11, 2013 (edited) Thank you all for your kind words !! I know it is and will be too hard but im a strong girl ! @TaraMaiden Im greek! Σε ευχαριστω πολυ!!(Thank you very much) i have read the quide and im trying to applied it in ''real life'' !! Edited January 11, 2013 by brokengirl3 Link to post Share on other sites
jovan Posted January 11, 2013 Share Posted January 11, 2013 I have been in Greece for 100's of time's. I love Greece and a greek ppl are great just go out have fun and take a long walks, case that's what i'd do if I were you I've been in all over Greece but there's one special place on one small island near the Paros where I have spent most of my summers, and I highly recommend that you travel there with your friends and check it out. The nature there is amazing. I have been all over the world, but nothing compares to that small island with small cottage and nothing else but trees and water around you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author brokengirl3 Posted January 11, 2013 Author Share Posted January 11, 2013 Yes we have a very lovely places to visit i think the island you have been is Antiiparos!Well, im trying to walk im trying to smile im trying to cope with all this hurt inside me!Its not easy though! Link to post Share on other sites
FailedFirstLove Posted January 11, 2013 Share Posted January 11, 2013 You can do this! I know you can! I'm trying my very hardest and after a while of no contact I no longer want contact cause I don't want the pain to come back! Be strong and stick to what wud be best long term for you. I'm like you too. Easy to forgive people I love. so all the bad memories seem to fade and all good memories stick. I think one day we will Look bak and laugh. Link to post Share on other sites
Author brokengirl3 Posted January 11, 2013 Author Share Posted January 11, 2013 Im so sorry to hear of you pain dear, but im glad you feeling better!i hope it will work for me as well!It is very hard to be dumped although you gave everything! Link to post Share on other sites
Author brokengirl3 Posted January 13, 2013 Author Share Posted January 13, 2013 im feeling weak again!i want to contact him:( Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Don't be silly.... What you 'feel' like doing, and what you are actually 'going' to do, are two entirely different - and opposite - things..... Right.....? Link to post Share on other sites
Author brokengirl3 Posted January 13, 2013 Author Share Posted January 13, 2013 i know i know!!Do you think nc make dumpers to think of dumpees or totaly forget them? Link to post Share on other sites
cavalier99 Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Who cares. It restores you sanity and eventually heals you from even caring what they think. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 (edited) i know i know!!Do you think nc make dumpers to think of dumpees or totaly forget them? Answer #1: Who cares -?! You really don't want to know any more! Answer #2: The only way NC makes DumpERS think of of the DumpEES, is to make them confused as to why they haven't heard from you... It's almost like they want you to be 'clingy' and needy' to make themselves feel better, and justified in having dumped you... But when they don't hear from you - Guaranteed that at some point down the line, they will begin to 'itch' and miss the familiarity of your previous contact... so they will kick your nest, and try to get a reaction out of you.... Even if it's "Hi, just wanted to make sure you're ok...." (No you didn't!) "How are you?" (What do you care, slime-ball??) or even, simply, "Hey".... (Push off and leave me alone!) Answer #3: See answer #1. Because really, that's all that matters. You shouldn't care how it makes him feel - he's history, he can fend for himself, deal with his own problems and lick his own wounds - you just keep staying NC!! Edited January 13, 2013 by TaraMaiden 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author brokengirl3 Posted January 13, 2013 Author Share Posted January 13, 2013 I want him thinking of me all the time.My dream is tog come back in tears and say he loves me too! Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 He may well do that. But the problem is, he will have a different motive. He will say what he believes you want to hear, in order to entice you back.. You know that, don't you? Remember, always remember: Actions speak louder than words. He can weep all he likes - but he needs to prove - irreversibly - that he means what he says. But you know by now that this isn't going to happen.... yeah? Link to post Share on other sites
Author brokengirl3 Posted January 13, 2013 Author Share Posted January 13, 2013 Honestly i dont know since he is so selfish Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Well you DO know - because you've just answered your own question. You want him to run back in tears - but he's never going to, without an ulterior motive - that is, getting what HE wants out of you - because he is so selfish. So you have to consider this completely over, and no amount of sweet-talking, inviting, texting or any kind of approach from him, will be genuine. Link to post Share on other sites
Author brokengirl3 Posted January 13, 2013 Author Share Posted January 13, 2013 This is too hard for me dear. So there is no hope? nothing? Link to post Share on other sites
LostOne1 Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 This is too hard for me dear. So there is no hope? nothing? if you want my advice. Keep NO hope. I kept hope and it HURT me so much, because it delayed my healing process. You need to move on and take it as the worst case, which is its OVER and he is done with you. So you need to go NC and move on and start to let him go. If he does come back time will tell, but DO NOT put any hope on it. If you do it will hurt a lot like it did for me when my hope was finally crushed. It hurt me a lot and I don't want to see you or anyone else going through it. I rather see my pain and sacrifice go well used towards others. So please keep NO hope and try to move on and think that he IS NOT coming back ever. It's hard I know.. but it might be the cold hearted truth. Link to post Share on other sites
Author brokengirl3 Posted January 14, 2013 Author Share Posted January 14, 2013 Good morning all!Kalimera!!Unfortunately i can not keep no hope!Deep inside i wait for him to UNDERSTAND what he MISSED!!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Stoic44 Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 (edited) Good morning all!Kalimera!!Unfortunately i can not keep no hope!Deep inside i wait for him to UNDERSTAND what he MISSED!!! You are a romantic like me. Abbracci. I've been in relationships with cold/distant women. What I would give for a woman who smothered me. LOl! What are you--Spanish/Italian? Look, ask yourself this: Do you want to spend the rest of your life with someone who left you for another woman? What would that future be like? Would you always be worried he would be leaving you for somebody else? Don't you want a man who loves you and only you and is smart enough to see that? Now is the time to focus on yourself. You need to focus on your life--your dreams and what you would like to do. Life does not guarantee romantic love. You could meet the love of your life and he could die in a car crash, leave you, etc. Love is great when it happens. Sometimes it carries us for a long time; sometimes a short time; but there are no guarantees. There are no magic spells or tricks to get somebody back. One day, after focusing on yourself, you might meet somebody new. Or your guy might come back after his fling with the new girl works out, and you decide you do not want him. Or he'll come back and you'll want him and try to work things out. But focus on yourself. Don't cling to hope. Life is short, and there are plenty of fish in the sea. Edited January 14, 2013 by Stoic44 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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