What now?

[Martinmusic]

Hey,

 

Long time lurker, first time poster.

 

I'll try to keep the story short:

 

Basically, I've known this girl for a few years and we've been friends, not very close friends though. She broke up with her ex a few months back and we've been getting a lot closer to where we are texting each other 24/7. Finally, I decided to tell her how I felt. Basically, got friendzoned there. Since then, i've been trying really hard to move on and "forget" about her. However, ever since I got rejected, shes been im/texting me and more so than ever before. ex. I used to start convos but now the roles have reversed.

 

I still really want to stay good friends but she's making it pretty hard for me to "move on." I still have feelings for her so its really difficult for me to ignore her. What should I do?

 

Any input would be appreciated.

 

Thanks!

[NateC]

You'll need to draw the line and tell her how you feel about the whole situation. Basically, let her know that the constant contact is sending mixed signals to you (if she's talking to you constantly it's a sign of interest, but she's already turned you down).

 

Alternatively you can just not ignore, but keep the conversations shorter and maybe take a bit more time to respond than usual. She'll get the hint and either a) back off a bit, or b) ask you why you haven't been responding ...and when she does, tell her exactly why.

[Martinmusic]

Yeah, I'm leaning towards just staying neutral and not instigating any conversations, with short replies to hers. I still really value her friendship so I don't want to come off too aggressive and accuse her of sending mixed messages even if that is what she's doing.

[NateC]

Yeah, I'm leaning towards just staying neutral and not instigating any conversations, with short replies to hers. I still really value her friendship so I don't want to come off too aggressive and accuse her of sending mixed messages even if that is what she's doing.

 

Exactly. She's still in the "getting over her ex" phase and attention is what she really needs to get over it. Eventually she'll taper off and meet some other guy.