mysunflower Posted December 16, 2012 Share Posted December 16, 2012 I have been slept naked for years, and the only thing I can wear on bed is my winter socks if it's cold, and I need a blanket even if it's cold or hot. My bf hated it, he always want to sleep with clothes on (such as T-shirt and boxers). I wanted to make him feel comfortable so I tried to sleep with my clothes on again, but it made me feel irritated. Seems like we having a problem now, I haven't had good sleeps for weeks and I feel tired (but he didn't care) Link to post Share on other sites
sweetkiwi Posted December 16, 2012 Share Posted December 16, 2012 So If you went to bed naked would he sneakily dress you in the middle of the night? Im just wondering how you're an adult and not able to sleep how you prefer. Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted December 16, 2012 Share Posted December 16, 2012 Huh???? What is his rationale (or lack thereof) for hating how YOU sleep? I'm very curious as to why he is so vehemently against it if that is what makes you comfortable? I came from a family of naked-sleepers (no shame or big deal to see Mom or Dad or sisters in their beds, naked) and have NEVER worn clothes in bed. I don't think I could comply with a guy who insisted I wear clothes to sleep in... 4 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted December 17, 2012 Share Posted December 17, 2012 I have been slept naked for years, and the only thing I can wear on bed is my winter socks if it's cold, and I need a blanket even if it's cold or hot. My bf hated it, he always want to sleep with clothes on (such as T-shirt and boxers). I wanted to make him feel comfortable so I tried to sleep with my clothes on again, but it made me feel irritated. Seems like we having a problem now, I haven't had good sleeps for weeks and I feel tired (but he didn't care) livign in a big family i sleep with clothes on because i basically throw th blanket off me often if i have nightmares it will be on the curtain rail.......i prefer to sleep with pjs...because i am a restless sleeper i end up with a nightie as a scarf......i used to sleep naked....i prefer now to sleep with clothes.....i dotn want to put a lock on my door because i am a deep sleeper when i finally get there if a fire started i would be in trouble..... another reason is if someone were to break in and be in my room....i sure as crap want a chance to fight him before i am naked......its a vulnerabel way to sleep...prefer clothes... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted December 17, 2012 Share Posted December 17, 2012 Sorry, but your bf is an idiot. He has no say in what you wear or don't wear to bed! I'm a naked sleeper too, and if my husband dared to tell me I had to wear something to bed, he'd be sleeping in the guest room or on the couch! Why does it bug him so much that you prefer to sleep naked? 5 Link to post Share on other sites
PogoStick Posted December 17, 2012 Share Posted December 17, 2012 Why does he care whether you sleep in clothes or not? I usually sleep naked but most girls I've been with wear some clothes. If women can put up with me taking 3/4 the bed then I can handle their clothing choice. Look me up if you need a naked sleeping partner! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author mysunflower Posted December 17, 2012 Author Share Posted December 17, 2012 I guess maybe because he come from a very strict catholic family, and because he is, like, from older generation than me. I tried my best to make my bf pleased in everything, but it's just hard to change a habit I got since I was a little kid Link to post Share on other sites
coffeebean201 Posted December 17, 2012 Share Posted December 17, 2012 You can't sleep well wearing pjs, you've tried it his way and it isn't working. Maybe time to have another chat with him - so he understands this is serious for you. He isn't working up to sleeping in separate beds is he? Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted December 17, 2012 Share Posted December 17, 2012 This is really quite odd. My bf was extremely pleased when he first heard that I like to sleep in the nude! In all seriousness, I see this as quite worrying. It's not just the sleeping naked bit, it's the fact that he seems to think it's OK for him to control what you wear.. not even in public, but in bed! Very bad sign IMO. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
johan Posted December 17, 2012 Share Posted December 17, 2012 From my perspective he's a damn fool. I use every trick I can think of to get my girlfriend to sleep naked. I'm often encouraging her to be naked at other times, too. But to be fair, people have their hangups. There are things I am particular about that others think are kind of ridiculous. I wouldn't want to be judged for them. If his hangup is over sleeping naked, you can't really judge him for it. I'd be more concerned if you said things that called his character into question, like if he berates you for it and makes you feel insecure about your body. And I guess sleeping with no clothes is sort of your hangup. I would hate to find out you ended the relationship over this, but then relationships have ended for more trivial things than this. If you and he aren't able to compromise on this, what happens when something actually significant comes up? 5 Link to post Share on other sites
KraftDinner Posted December 17, 2012 Share Posted December 17, 2012 I guess maybe because he come from a very strict catholic family, and because he is, like, from older generation than me. I tried my best to make my bf pleased in everything, but it's just hard to change a habit I got since I was a little kid Well, if he is that religious, he shouldn't be sleeping with someone who isn't his wife anyway. Maybe his guilt is somehow being transfered onto you, and he somehow sees your naked body as dirty. But he'll still sleep with you. Huh. That's not really fair... Btw, I was raised Catholic, went to Catholic school, catechism, church every sunday, sang in choirs...and I'm always making my bf take his clothes off before we go to bed, haha. (I'm really not religious at all tho, I'm agnostic, despite my upbringing.) 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author mysunflower Posted December 17, 2012 Author Share Posted December 17, 2012 Well, if he is that religious, he shouldn't be sleeping with someone who isn't his wife anyway. Maybe his guilt is somehow being transfered onto you, and he somehow sees your naked body as dirty. But he'll still sleep with you. Huh. That's not really fair... Btw, I was raised Catholic, went to Catholic school, catechism, church every sunday, sang in choirs...and I'm always making my bf take his clothes off before we go to bed, haha. (I'm really not religious at all tho, I'm agnostic, despite my upbringing.) Thank you for sharing, after reading the comments, I just feel really upset Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted December 17, 2012 Share Posted December 17, 2012 Have you tried a compromise ? I'm thinking something like a thin blanket on top of you, that you can wrap yourself in, and the normal blanket that covers both of you on top of that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
movingon12 Posted December 17, 2012 Share Posted December 17, 2012 That is so weird. The fact that he doesn't do it himself is no reason to expect you not to. I assume you two have sex? So it's ok for you to be naked then? But not when you're asleep? I would be very annoyed if my SO was being so hypocritical and controlling. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted December 17, 2012 Share Posted December 17, 2012 Ahhh..yet another "Cafeteria Catholic." Like one who moves down the line picking and choosing which dishes to put on their tray, this guy picks and chooses which sins are 'ok' to commit (those would be the ones that serve him - like getting laid) and then standing firm on others. Why are you bothering with this guy? He's a hypocrite. I like this Cafeteria Catholic term, i'll have to remember it. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
coffeebean201 Posted December 18, 2012 Share Posted December 18, 2012 I'm sorry you are upset. Sounds like this is a difficult issue for both of you. Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted December 18, 2012 Share Posted December 18, 2012 This man is a DAMN fool! I WISH my wife would sleep naked all the time. She does like to but she knows that if she sleeps naked...she ain't gettin any sleep! 4 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lobouspo Posted December 18, 2012 Share Posted December 18, 2012 Sleep in separate beds...lots of couples do because of issues like snoring Link to post Share on other sites
BrokenPrincess Posted December 18, 2012 Share Posted December 18, 2012 I completely understand your discomfort. I always slept naked and now wear just panties. Anything more than that and I feel like I am twisting and suffocating all night. When I had my baby, I REALLY struggled with this because friends & family were at my house at all hours trying to help & let me get a little sleep but I was forced to be dressed & modest. I was so uncomfortable I could never sleep! That said- my husband LOVES that I sleep in just panties even though he is usually more clothed. Does your bf have other similar hang-ups? You dressing too provocatively or shame about your bedroom activities? Link to post Share on other sites
worldgonewrong Posted December 18, 2012 Share Posted December 18, 2012 What guy in his right mind DOESN'T want his lady-love to sleep naked next to him? I'm baffled. 3 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author mysunflower Posted December 20, 2012 Author Share Posted December 20, 2012 I completely understand your discomfort. I always slept naked and now wear just panties. Anything more than that and I feel like I am twisting and suffocating all night. When I had my baby, I REALLY struggled with this because friends & family were at my house at all hours trying to help & let me get a little sleep but I was forced to be dressed & modest. I was so uncomfortable I could never sleep! That said- my husband LOVES that I sleep in just panties even though he is usually more clothed. Does your bf have other similar hang-ups? You dressing too provocatively or shame about your bedroom activities? I guess both. my bf doesn't even like me wearing short skirt when I go out, I'm trying to get used to wearing panties to go to sleep now, hope more clothes would be added later easily. And no, I don't want to break up or sleep seperately. I got a man I love more than anything else, and I'm totally happy to be with him every days and nights. I just need to compromise with his old fashioned mind. Link to post Share on other sites
jwi71 Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 Don't confuse compromise with control. It's not compromise if you always move towards him (aka he gets his way). 2 Link to post Share on other sites
geegirl Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 (edited) I can't understand the issue. I only sleep with panties on otherwise I can never get comfortable. It's not like you're out sleeping on your driveway naked. It's in the confines and privacy of your own bedroom. Sleeping naked and going out with a mini skirt are two separate things. I'm trying hard to relate it to being old-fashioned, when it's most likely a sign of control. You said you started wearing clothes to make him feel comfortable? Where's your comfort? You've been doing it for 5 years. Strict Catholic. He can have pre-marital sex but must wear clothes in bed. Funny. Edited December 20, 2012 by geegirl Link to post Share on other sites
AlexDP Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 Don't confuse compromise with control. It's not compromise if you always move towards him (aka he gets his way). But don't confuse control with compromise either. In this case though, I feel that the OP should do whatever she wants to do. I do know that I would not feel comfortable sleeping naked if my partner was wearing clothes, but if I wanted to sleep naked, she would not be able to tell me no. Look. If this is very important to your man and you're fine with sleeping in panties, it's not that big of a deal. If it's a symptom of something larger, of him controlling you, then worry. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 Strict Catholic. He can have pre-marital sex but must wear clothes in bed. Funny. This. Reeks of hypocrisy to me, really. Link to post Share on other sites
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