Author DirtyDancing Posted April 4, 2013 Author Share Posted April 4, 2013 It never fails to amaze me how some women cant realise a lot of cheating men relegate women into two categories:you're either one they want to cherish,have a relationship with,OR you're a bedmate,with all the sexual excitement that is inherent to a new relationship(that they dont get from their partners anymore).Basically, if you're in the latter, this guy will never fall in love with you-ever.Dont fool yourself, there's no emotions involved,falling in love with you ,etc etc.He is in love with his partner.He's a louse,all the same,but he's chosen his partner and you're just a side dish-dont forget that. I know this is true. Link to post Share on other sites
Lillyfree Posted April 4, 2013 Share Posted April 4, 2013 It never fails to amaze me how some women cant realise a lot of cheating men relegate women into two categories:you're either one they want to cherish,have a relationship with,OR you're a bedmate,with all the sexual excitement that is inherent to a new relationship(that they dont get from their partners anymore).Basically, if you're in the latter, this guy will never fall in love with you-ever.Dont fool yourself, there's no emotions involved,falling in love with you ,etc etc.He is in love with his partner.He's a louse,all the same,but he's chosen his partner and you're just a side dish-dont forget that. THIS. DD, once you allow this to sink in it will be a lot easier to get over everything. Link to post Share on other sites
Author DirtyDancing Posted April 5, 2013 Author Share Posted April 5, 2013 THIS. DD, once you allow this to sink in it will be a lot easier to get over everything. Yep, I'm just a bed-mate. Fantastic. Link to post Share on other sites
Lillyfree Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 Yep, I'm just a bed-mate. Fantastic. some men (and women) are ok with treating people this way. i don't get it, but i know it happens. use this to your advantage. being aware that someone is a POS who could not only cheat on their partner but also play with another person's emotions in this way should make it easier to put it behind you. your ego's a bit bashed up at the moment... but you'll get better. how are you feeling today? Link to post Share on other sites
Author DirtyDancing Posted April 5, 2013 Author Share Posted April 5, 2013 some men (and women) are ok with treating people this way. i don't get it, but i know it happens. use this to your advantage. being aware that someone is a POS who could not only cheat on their partner but also play with another person's emotions in this way should make it easier to put it behind you. your ego's a bit bashed up at the moment... but you'll get better. how are you feeling today? Thank you... I'll get over it; not only because they're driving off into the sunset any day now, but because I know he's a snake. I was always attracted to him but I didn't start having 'feelings' until he brought it up and the attraction was made known as mutual. I'm ok.. lately I've been getting down on myself thinking that men only see me as a woman part of that second category being a fun, sexy, bedmate. Not because I sleep with a guy right away or anything, but everything I've tried has fizzled so fast! I feel like maybe I'm not good enough to be the one to cherish and love. I know that's not true, it's only because it's been so damn long since someone has legitimately pursued me and romanced me I guess. This weekend is a very close friend of mine's birthday. I have a feeling he will be there (with her). I've had a couple times seeing them both together and it's extremely awkward for me and him but thankfully this will be the last time. Come to think of it, every time in the past several months that I've seen him with her, at least at one point in the night he will 'accidentally' brush up against me- even with her there... no shame at all. I hope she dumps him en route. Link to post Share on other sites
Lillyfree Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 I'm ok.. lately I've been getting down on myself thinking that men only see me as a woman part of that second category being a fun, sexy, bedmate. Not because I sleep with a guy right away or anything, but everything I've tried has fizzled so fast! I feel like maybe I'm not good enough to be the one to cherish and love. I know that's not true, it's only because it's been so damn long since someone has legitimately pursued me and romanced me I guess. of course you're good enough! you might not be coming in contact with right kind of guys, or your picker's broken... i feel sorry for men who divide women into categories - if only they realised there ARE women out there who can be the fun bedmate AND the good girl to be cherished and loved. and the smart ones do realise that! This weekend is a very close friend of mine's birthday. I have a feeling he will be there (with her). I've had a couple times seeing them both together and it's extremely awkward for me and him but thankfully this will be the last time. Come to think of it, every time in the past several months that I've seen him with her, at least at one point in the night he will 'accidentally' brush up against me- even with her there... no shame at all. I hope she dumps him en route. i would have made sure i dig my heel into his shin when he brushes past. what a ... hopefully she will. one thing i wish OM's gf would do - and hoping she already has. Link to post Share on other sites
Author DirtyDancing Posted April 5, 2013 Author Share Posted April 5, 2013 (edited) of course you're good enough! you might not be coming in contact with right kind of guys, or your picker's broken... ha, yes my "picker's broken"! that's the problem I think (or I hope, so that I can 'fix' my 'picker'!) Not that I want her to leave him so I can have him, but because he can't keep his d*ck in his pants and therefore he's scum. I thought the first time this happened, it was an 'oops!' hoping he got it 'off his chest' so to speak... but the fact that he repeatedly and persistently tried to have more and finally all of me even when I told him to stop makes me realize he's a complete *******. Edited April 5, 2013 by DirtyDancing Link to post Share on other sites
Author DirtyDancing Posted April 9, 2013 Author Share Posted April 9, 2013 He left today... and I feel like **** for participating in our short-lived affair. I knew this was going to happen; I just didn't know I'd feel a hole. I went to my friend's party the other day, and they didn't come to dinner but I had a feeling he would show up later at the next stop by himself. He did and he always moved to sit near to me, kept his eyes on me a lot from across the room, we laughed, had the same banter as always. At the end of the night, it was a prime opportunity for us to have one last hurrah, because as much as I know he's a jerk and I deserve more, I still really like the guy and am obviously still attracted to him. Of course that thought was crossing our minds. Fortunately, we left in a small group, so we couldn't be alone... , but he hung back for a minute after I turned to walk away, and he grabbed me into a hug and pulled me into him really close and long. We caught each others' hand and I gave his hand a squeeze on the sly. We didn't say goodbye, but it was. He's currently driving off into the sunset with his girlfriend. Not that I envy her, but why can't I find someone who really loves me? I am so lonely and so close to giving up. I went out dancing with friends the other night and men were all over me; I turn heads, I'm sincere, smart, friendly, sweet, fun, vivacious, I think I have many attractive qualities. I spent most of my time dancing with this one guy there, I was just enjoying dancing having fun, and at one point he kissed me, the kiss and the dancing was turning me on, and later he came to find me to say goodbye and he just walked off.. nothing. So I've been all fired up since. Because I've been feeling that way, if the opportunity was there the other night to have one last time with him I would have. As much as I'm constantly aroused because I literally get left hanging by every guy I'm find myself interested in, I'm not after empty sex at all. That would be easy to find. But I want not only a very strong attraction but respect as well. I'm truly wondering if that's impossible to find. Sometimes I feel like men only see me as just sex and not worthy of more than that. This situation just digs the cut deeper. Link to post Share on other sites
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