suggest me..Im in trouble related to My friendship

[mahi079]

Im new to dis forum..dis is my first post...im a girl 21 years and i love my best friend who is a girl..

We have been friends from the past 8 years..she met me first in 8th standard,we r from different sections,we went to same tuitions n got close..she said to me first that she want me as her friend life long and im her best friend..

i didnt lyk her attitude n i jst stayed as a friend n neglected her..later on at the tym of board xams wen she stopped talking to me.. i realised dat i too lyk her n wrote a letter penning down all my feelings wit a sorry note..as a result we got patched up.After board exams we joined in separate colleges..though our paths are different we stayed in contact through messages and calls..As years passed our bonding went on growing stronger and stronger..One fine day when she was in depressed mood she called me and we talked for hours..then the next day she messaged me I Love You..I felt some different sensation in me..Though I felt she means alott to me by that time..I didnt express my feelings..When ever I receive her messages or talk to her or when I meet her I undergo a different feeling..my heart beats fast..she expressed her feelings many times...She said dat I mean alott to her..Without me she would never live in this world..But slowly after some 4 years of our friendship..distance increased..shez busy in her life..wenever we used to talk she used to say about her friends n other blah blah blah..I felt that shez taking me for granted..But recently again we got close on messages n calls..

One day I messaged her,will u be wit me wit this same love forever..She replied me that she want me beside her everytime and at every moment.

Once she sent me a forward message.in your next birth what relation u want to have with me..I replied,I wanna be a sister to u so dat we can be together...and I asked her the same question..for that she replied that she want me to be born as a boy in my next birth so that we can get married..

plzz dont take it negative..she means that she want to stay with me forever..

Whenever she is in problems she first tells me and even I do the same..Though I have many friend who are more closer to me than her..I have more strong feelings for her..I wanna get close to her

Once she went into depression and she messaged me that shez crying like hell and needs me to console her and want to hug me tight..But unfortunately I was out of city at that time..I tried to console her on calls..

Later on one fine day.in between our conversation she told me recently that the letter which I have written to her long ago is there wit her still..and she even said that it is the most valuable gift in her life and would keep it wit her till death..I was surprised..

My actual problem is that though we love each other alott but we are not able to express it and be free when we meet..everything is fine on messages and calls, but when we meet not even a single word comes out of our mouth..I even asked her the same on text.why are'nt you free with me when we meet,she said that she is not able to express her feelings when we meet..I dont want this to happen..I wanna hug her and get intimate to her..so pleaseeeeeeeeee her me so that we can be intimate when we meet in the same way as we were on messages and calls...

 

Please note one thing..help me with kind heart and don't take us negative

[kamani]

Frankly, are you aware that you are homosexual?

 

Have you felt attraction towards other girls too? What about your friend? Is she attracted to other girls?

[mahi079]

no,you got me wrong..

I didnt get attracted to any other girl like this ever before

even for her it happened with me only

[kamani]

Feeling this sort of attraction towards same sex is not normal.

 

You have to figure out whether you are hetero-sexual, bi-sexual or homo-sexual. Every human being falls into one of these catogories.

 

Do you feel attraction towards boys?