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G, I'm glad to hear you had such a wonderful visit with your DD, including the opportunity to give her the Christmas presents you've been saving for her. Best of luck, G, with the upcoming conference on 2/19.

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G, I'm glad to hear you had such a wonderful visit with your DD, including the opportunity to give her the Christmas presents you've been saving for her. Best of luck, G, with the upcoming conference on 2/19.

 

 

 

Hey everyone, today and the last few days. I have had some huge problems controlling my emotions. I wish i was strong enough for all this. I dont think I am.

 

I feel like im losing control of everything. I feel like i am going to lose my house.

 

Just cant stop crying all day.

 

My life is a complete mess.

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G, I'm so sorry to hear you are going through so much emotional pain while having only a few hours/week access to your DD and -- to add insult to injury -- having to pay $50/hour to have someone set there and make sure your DD is "safe." Yes, that is an absolute mess and is an outrageous situation for a father who is devoted to his little girl.

 

As you well know, however, you must remain strong for your DD -- which means holding yourself together for the upcoming conference that is about ten days away. That said, you have plenty to cry about. So don't feel bad, at all, about the need to cry. Lord knows I did months and months of on-again, off-again crying following my separation, during which time I lost all five of the step kids I had been loving for 16 years. But I survived it and now, six years later, am stronger than I ever was. -- Chuck

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Hey everyone, today and the last few days. I have had some huge problems controlling my emotions. I wish i was strong enough for all this. I dont think I am.

 

I feel like im losing control of everything. I feel like i am going to lose my house.

 

Just cant stop crying all day.

 

My life is a complete mess.

 

So sorry for your pain. It does get better, honestly. At first, I had trouble going to the grocery store and seeing all of the couples walking around. Really, one day, it was all I could do to get out of there with my groceries. It was awful. I got to my car and just sobbed. I cried at the drop of a hat and there were so many triggers, it didn't take much to start me off.

 

It is hard to go through and there are days that it seems it will never get better, but it does. Hang in there, be there for your daughter as she is the most important thing in your future. There will be other houses (I do know how it feels; I am losing mine).

 

You can do this. It is not easy, but you can do it. Better days will be coming to you.

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  • 2 weeks later...
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Hey All,

 

Got to see DD for 2 hours yesterday, was good, and i got a kiss from her. She actually wore me out! 2 hours of uninterrupted play is a lot for me these days ;-)

 

Been pacing around the house worried about our upcoming case management conference. Worried what can go wrong. Not sure why.

 

Case management worker told me that stbxw said she would not schedule another appointment until our upcoming "mediation" on tue.

 

Not sure what to think about that.

 

-G

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G, thanks for giving us another update. Am glad to hear you had another fun visit with your DD. I wish you and your DD the best outcome at the 2/19 conference!

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Hey All,

 

So the case management conference came and went. I gained some more rights. I get to see her now unsupervised on alternating weekends. I am happy for this.

 

As I sit here though I feel like i am chronicling my failure, but i know today, that it was another win.

 

I am now paying 688 a mo in child support. Sucked from my paycheck. But I still just wish shed come back.... god why??

 

Someone should slap me i guess. Having a hard time being objective lately.

 

-G

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G, I'm glad to hear you've gained more rights with your child. Also, it will be nice that you no longer have to suffer the indignity of paying someone $50/hour to watch and protect the child from yourself.

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  • 10 months later...
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Hey all,

 

I figured I would stop on by as it has been a whole while since I came back.

 

I wanted to let you all know that I went through a very expensive legal battle and I did come out on top and I won a lot of rights back, and I am happy for that. I do not have primary custody, but I was not kicked out of my childs life.

 

I wasn't sure if anyone was still interested or kicking around, but I would like to extend a huge thank you to the people in my life, especially to the posters here that replied and helped me through this. I would like to personally thank Downtown and the other frequent posters who gave me good solid advice on my situation. It is appreciated and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. If there is anything I could ever do. Let me know and consider it done.

 

 

I am not sure if anyone is interested in the legal battle story, or if anyone cares, but if is anyone interested let me know.

 

Sitting now where I am. I have a lot of hate about life, a lot of misery, a lot of failure and unhappiness. However, I am building on top of what I have and trying to clear myself and my life out. I did have several set backs. I did meet another woman, and I feel this same thing is playing out as you guys had warned. Depending on how she goes, I am probably considering no longer dating and marrying. I most likely will just get a vasectomy and life a reclusive life as it fits me. I just need to get over the loneliness as each relationship seems to be ending in the same pattern.

 

I have been awoken to the legal climates and dating life around the US and I have been through the looking glass. I am not going to keep doing this.

 

I hope to move above it all and just life my life for me and my daughter. That is my main focus. My main focus is not letting her hate me and having her love me until I die of natural causes.

 

So again, thank you everyone for your time, energy and help!

 

 

 

-Greg

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Greg, it's so great to hear from you! Thanks for returning -- nearly a year later -- to give us an update on the situation with you and your DD. I assume your divorce is now finalized so you've managed to emerge from that long, dark tunnel. I know that I felt such relief to get the D behind me. So what happened during the legal battle itself? Yes, inquiring minds here want to know -- well, at least I know I would like to know.

 

As to your skepticism about dating, please keep in mind it takes quite a while to heal. When I ended my 15 year M, I had absolutely no interest in dating for two years and -- in hindsight -- I should have waited an extra year. Generally, the longer you've been married, the longer the recovery takes.

 

And, when you do heal, you've got to be willing to forgo the adulation and fireworks that unstable women are so quick to offer when coming out of the gate. But stable women do have their charms even though they usually lack the instant intense passion. But you already know that, LOL.

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