Lillyfree Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 so... last night i had a few glasses of wine. and texted him, saying i hope he's had a good christmas ... he responds in a nice, condescending way - saying yes thank you, hope you had the same. and i reply with 'go eff yourself, i have ended up with stress cardiomyopathy and was a complete mess for a while, and this is all you have to say...' now for the extra little filling in that cr*p sandwich - my phone dies as soon as i sent the message. as in, the screen goes blank. i could see that there was a message light flashing, but could not see anything. i restart the phone, nothing. took it to get repaired and got a loaner, there is no way i can retrieve the messages. and they will be lost during the repairs, apparently everything gets reset. so not only have i made a huge mistake, undone last month and a half's hard work, but have confirmed to him that i am a crazy person. and i'll never even know what his response was i was thinking of sending him a message saying what happened, that i didn't get the last messages from him and to apologise for making a mistake and contacting him, and that i'll just leave him alone. should i do that or just keep quiet? Link to post Share on other sites
SunsetRed Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 Just keep quiet and don't worry about it. Maybe he never actually got the eff off message! It could've been the Universe's way of protecting you. OR if he did get it, then maybe he was meant to get a message like that. My xMM was always so condescending to me as well. I felt like telling him to go eff himself too. He would call me and act concerned and ask if I was dating anyone, as if to say that he was worried that I'd become a recluse, basket case without him. He would also call me to remind me that he still valued our "friendship" Your response to your xmm was very human and straight from your gut, so let it be. You probably did the right thing. Link to post Share on other sites
Catplates Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 If you have broken up, then don't worry about it. He probably isn't. Explaining would only mean more contact, which is not good. Just try to hide you phone from yourself when you have a couple of drinks. Cat Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lillyfree Posted December 27, 2012 Author Share Posted December 27, 2012 Just keep quiet and don't worry about it. Maybe he never actually got the eff off message! It could've been the Universe's way of protecting you. OR if he did get it, then maybe he was meant to get a message like that. My xMM was always so condescending to me as well. I felt like telling him to go eff himself too. He would call me and act concerned and ask if I was dating anyone, as if to say that he was worried that I'd become a recluse, basket case without him. He would also call me to remind me that he still valued our "friendship" Your response to your xmm was very human and straight from your gut, so let it be. You probably did the right thing. he did receive the eff off message, the universe was a bit late. and just my luck that my phone dies as his reply comes through - but maybe that was for a good reason too, who knows what was in it. one of his messages said 'i'm glad that you got in touch'. i'm such a frigging mess .... If you have broken up, then don't worry about it. He probably isn't. Explaining would only mean more contact, which is not good. Just try to hide you phone from yourself when you have a couple of drinks. Cat i'm so angry with myself - can't believe i slipped up like that. maybe i should stay away from drinking altogether... Link to post Share on other sites
promises Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 I think leaving it with efff off and no further response was perfect. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 Don't drink and text! Holy crap, when will people learn?? Drink and break-ups DON'T MAKE GOOD MIXERS! And texting is a headphukkin' chaser! Link to post Share on other sites
beyond Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 so... last night i had a few glasses of wine. and texted him, saying i hope he's had a good christmas ... he responds in a nice, condescending way - saying yes thank you, hope you had the same. and i reply with 'go eff yourself, i have ended up with stress cardiomyopathy and was a complete mess for a while, and this is all you have to say...' now for the extra little filling in that cr*p sandwich - my phone dies as soon as i sent the message. as in, the screen goes blank. i could see that there was a message light flashing, but could not see anything. i restart the phone, nothing. took it to get repaired and got a loaner, there is no way i can retrieve the messages. and they will be lost during the repairs, apparently everything gets reset. so not only have i made a huge mistake, undone last month and a half's hard work, but have confirmed to him that i am a crazy person. and i'll never even know what his response was i was thinking of sending him a message saying what happened, that i didn't get the last messages from him and to apologise for making a mistake and contacting him, and that i'll just leave him alone. should i do that or just keep quiet? Now, there's an idea - a NC phone, one that automatically dies before your ex can text you:laugh: Oh Lilly, I've done something similar myself after just one glass of wine (I'm such a lighweight!) - it just makes it less easy to listen to the voice of reason inside you - the one that says 'don't do it, you know it will hurt more in the end'. I would just leave it as it is. You said nothing very terrible - all very understandable given the situation. What could he possible say in his reply to you that would change anything??? Link to post Share on other sites
SunsetRed Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 Don't beat yourself up over it. We've all done it. I've done it myself, after coming home from a sucky date and having wine. If you just leave it alone for awhile, he'll end up contacting you again and you'll have a chance to redeem yourself by acting nonchalant around him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lillyfree Posted December 27, 2012 Author Share Posted December 27, 2012 thank you everyone for your replies... as is deserved, i'm still feeling like a complete fool.. but also so very angry with him if nothing else, this little episode confirmed that there was a reason i've stopped contact with him in the first place, he's a gigantic tool and does nothing but make me feel miserable. so he can indeed eff off. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lillyfree Posted December 27, 2012 Author Share Posted December 27, 2012 Don't beat yourself up over it. We've all done it. I've done it myself, after coming home from a sucky date and having wine. If you just leave it alone for awhile, he'll end up contacting you again and you'll have a chance to redeem yourself by acting nonchalant around him. thanks SR it's good to hear i'm one of few people that's done this, not some crazy stalker person. that's the last thing i'd want to become... i'll heal the burn, keep being p*ssed off with myself for a while, and carry on as i was before. not much else i can do really... and if he does contact me i just won't reply. this door has been slammed shut i think. i don't need his cr*p in my life, it was and will be much better without him. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 If you must drink, make sure it's with someone who you don't mind grabbing your 'phone and telling you "Don't be such an idiot!" 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ThatJustHappened Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 Now, there's an idea - a NC phone, one that automatically dies before your ex can text you:laugh: Oh Lilly, I've done something similar myself after just one glass of wine (I'm such a lighweight!) - it just makes it less easy to listen to the voice of reason inside you - the one that says 'don't do it, you know it will hurt more in the end'. I would just leave it as it is. You said nothing very terrible - all very understandable given the situation. What could he possible say in his reply to you that would change anything??? There's an app for that actually.. OP, don't beat yourself up. I've drunk texted exes too..and it's so much easier to text than it is to call, isn't it? It doesn't feel as real. Well, if he really is out of your life for good, then it doesn't really matter, does it? In a year or so, you'll be laughing about this. I promise. I laugh at myself all the time for how I've acted with exes..it's just silly. I don't care what they think of me anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lillyfree Posted December 27, 2012 Author Share Posted December 27, 2012 There's an app for that actually.. OP, don't beat yourself up. I've drunk texted exes too..and it's so much easier to text than it is to call, isn't it? It doesn't feel as real. Well, if he really is out of your life for good, then it doesn't really matter, does it? In a year or so, you'll be laughing about this. I promise. I laugh at myself all the time for how I've acted with exes..it's just silly. I don't care what they think of me anymore. well, i can think of it as a joint christmas/parting present that i've given him: a huge ego boost wrapped up in my dignity. and he can do whatever he wants with it. (i can suggest some places where he can shove it) Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 "some"....? I think one is enough. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lillyfree Posted December 27, 2012 Author Share Posted December 27, 2012 "some"....? I think one is enough. haha, true ...it's big enough to accommodate such a generous gift too... Link to post Share on other sites
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