johnjohn2013 Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Hi all Am not sure if this is a addiction or not am a 35 year old male and i have been intrested in sex for as long as i can remember(with women) my girlfriend does not seem too intrested in sex i have tried alsorts to make her want sex more, i would like it as much as i could get.Am lucky if i get it from her once in 3 or 4 months, I always am horny but when i masturbate i just want more and more, and i end up online chatting on chat rooms to females (dirty chat) Am i wrong for doing this many thanks John Link to post Share on other sites
Balzac Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Wrong is staying in a relationship with a woman who rations sex. Find a woman who wants you sexually, enjoys sex with you and engages with you frequently. Link to post Share on other sites
sweetkiwi Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Ehhh its for sure questionable behavior but you really need to pair up with a woman who has the same.sexual appetite. Sex addicts actually have sex. With anyone. Anytime. Anywhere. You aren't a sex addict. Link to post Share on other sites
Author johnjohn2013 Posted December 31, 2012 Author Share Posted December 31, 2012 Ehhh its for sure questionable behavior but you really need to pair up with a woman who has the same.sexual appetite. Sex addicts actually have sex. With anyone. Anytime. Anywhere. You aren't a sex addict. But thats the point i would have sex With anyone. Anytime and anywhere i have been doing that for a while now Link to post Share on other sites
sweetkiwi Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Huh? You're meeting these women for random restroom sex? Link to post Share on other sites
KraftDinner Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Yes, it's wrong. Spare your gf and let her go. Link to post Share on other sites
Author johnjohn2013 Posted December 31, 2012 Author Share Posted December 31, 2012 Huh? You're meeting these women for random restroom sex? Am not proud off what am doing but yes Link to post Share on other sites
Author johnjohn2013 Posted December 31, 2012 Author Share Posted December 31, 2012 Yes, it's wrong. Spare your gf and let her go. Not so easy i have told her loads off times what am up to and that its over but she wont let it be over, Link to post Share on other sites
sweetkiwi Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Oh okay missed that part. Yeah its wrong and dangerous. I hope you are at least using protection. You should research sexual addiction meetings in your area. Its hard to get into most because lots of people are not serious about it and use it to hook up. You have to be serious about cutting back and stopping. I hope you leave your girlfriend, but you probably won't. Link to post Share on other sites
Author johnjohn2013 Posted December 31, 2012 Author Share Posted December 31, 2012 Oh okay missed that part. Yeah its wrong and dangerous. I hope you are at least using protection. You should research sexual addiction meetings in your area. Its hard to get into most because lots of people are not serious about it and use it to hook up. You have to be serious about cutting back and stopping. I hope you leave your girlfriend, but you probably won't. i do use protection, and as for my g/f i have told her its over loads of times and what am up to but she lives with me in my house and will not leave i have tried alsorts but she wont go Link to post Share on other sites
sweetkiwi Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 So she's fully aware you are in fact an active sex addict and you have sex with strangers? If you say so. You should both seek therapy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author johnjohn2013 Posted December 31, 2012 Author Share Posted December 31, 2012 Do you want her to go? Is it possible that she's OK with the relationship as it is, with you getting what she doesn't want to or can't give you somewhere else? It's not exactly a traditional situation, but it does work for some couples... I have told her that i dont want her to go but as she knows what i get up to if she wants it over well thats my loss but she must move out and not me Link to post Share on other sites
Author johnjohn2013 Posted December 31, 2012 Author Share Posted December 31, 2012 So she's fully aware you are in fact an active sex addict and you have sex with strangers? If you say so. You should both seek therapy. i have told her i do it but she just says "yeah yeah what ever" what ever that means Link to post Share on other sites
sweetkiwi Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Well she either wants to think you're lying. Or she is pretending she doesn't care. Either way very sad. You dont seem to be trying too hard to explain exactly what your issues are in this regard. Often sexual addiction is in combination with other dangerous and destructive issues. If you're serious about stopping and EVER going right by her you will force her to confront the issues YOU have. Then it's really up to her after that. Can't play stupid. If it were me i would leave said person. And seek genuine help. Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Ehhh its for sure questionable behavior but you really need to pair up with a woman who has the same.sexual appetite. Sex addicts actually have sex. With anyone. Anytime. Anywhere. You aren't a sex addict. Sexual addicts vary. There are I addicts and II addicts. I's are all about the masturbation and compulsive behaviors I.e. Flashing II's are more in-person cheat on everyone types. More impulsive. Then there are the odd ones out (about 10%) that act out in both ways or combine rituals with impulsive behaviours, I.e. Rapists with a particular trigger. OP, tbh, you sound like you are on the line but probably more compulsive. If you suspect sexual addiction, seriously go to someone that specializes in it and GET YOURSELF SCREENED. Tbh, it sounds more like compulsive behavior than full-on addiction BUT I may be totally completely wrong. It may also be intimacy issues between you and gf. What are her reasonings? Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Whoa whoa whoa Just read the rest of the thread :facepalm: Yeah, sexual addiction. Like: RED ALERT! Yeah, no question about that anymore. Even the unstable crazy relationship you guys have. Jeez. Talk to SA. SA.org She might want to pop into s-anon. She sounds like my old groupies. Jeezus. They'll get you guys started. It's incredibly unhealthy for both of you, whether she's accepting of it or not. Very important. Don't wait. Get in to see a CSAT or ATSA. I myself have had sexual compulsion issues and I am married to a sexual addict who took 3 years and quite the kick to the head to get help. Please get help. A book for you and her: You: out of the shadows Her: your sexually addicted spouse 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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