dolcegal2002 Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 guys helpp me please!! i was using my boyfriends computer last night and realized he had a profile on match.com. we have been together for 6 months. he denied any wrong doing at first. i stormed out. i dont think i have ever cried so much. i went home and typed his password on match.com and it let me in. it showed me the women he had been talking to but not what it was said because the emails go to his email address and not to match database. i contacted the women he seemed to come in touch with but i havent heard from them to see if he had propositioned them or not. he and his best friend assure me that he never met any of them. my boyfriend tells me he loves me and wants to work things out. he said he doesnt want to break up. he also told me the reason he had the profile (which i confirmed was up and paid for before we met but that still no excuse) was because sometimes he didnt think we would make it because he has two children and things can really get overwelming at times. but i love the kids, sometimes things get bad but we get over it. nothing is perfect everyday. he said he loves me that we need to talk. he im me and told me that he is sorry that if i want some days to think he will wait and even if i decided to leave if i have a change of heart he will be waiting. i told him that i would rather cut off my hand that held his again.... a little rough but i am soooo hurt. we left it at that. i told him there was no way i would forgive him but i want to. god, i am so inlove with him and if he seems remorceful do you think we should try therapy? do you think i should walk? please help, i am going insane Link to post Share on other sites
The_Analyzer Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 Its all up to you what you feel is the right thing to do. You say you're inlove with him, then maybe give him a second chance. You said he had a match.com profile before you all got together, so I would ask him to get rid of it. I do think however, you need to be on alert, since this has bothered you, and if you find it again, or he wont get rid of it, then maybe you should move on. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Leikela Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 It is really up to you and how you feel on whether you should take him back or not. If you want another perspective, I think you should take some time away and think about all of this. What a betrayal to you that he would talk to other women on Match.com and pretend that he was single. I think his excuse that things were a bit rocky as a reason for his behavior is a poor one. That's no reason to start seeking other women out. Also, what does that say about your relationship if he thinks you're not going to work out and then goes and seeks other women. What he did was wrong. You have to ask yourself if this kind of behavior is something that will always plague your relationship at any sign of trouble and whether you want to deal with that if it does. How can you ever trust him again? What kind of person does something like this? I think you're starting to see his true colors and it's time to decide what makes your relationship or breaks it. Link to post Share on other sites
Velveteel Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 I say: one more try and just one. First, take a week or so to think about it. Then, when you talk with him, bring up your concerns, and those of the other posters. Try the advice on marriagebuilders.com, too, and consider talking with a therapist. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dolcegal2002 Posted August 18, 2004 Author Share Posted August 18, 2004 i decided not to forgive him. i actually feel good about it just got a gucci bag and shoes and i feel like a million bucks. hey! after all i am single, make more money than him, have no kids and i am 13 years his junior so FK him! thanks guys for your support... i am glad i am seeing the light! Link to post Share on other sites
Leikela Posted August 18, 2004 Share Posted August 18, 2004 Good for you! You deserve someone who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated. He wasn't it. Good luck to you! Link to post Share on other sites
Kasey70 Posted August 18, 2004 Share Posted August 18, 2004 Woohoo dolcegal, you go girl! Good for you! Link to post Share on other sites
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