I put a man in the hospital for slapping my best female friend...What does this mean?

[MercuryMorrison1]

So I'll shorten this up as much as possible.

 

New years eve, around 11:00am Im at houseparty with some friends includning a girl whom I've known since the 6th grade and have kind of always had a thing for. Were all having a few drinks and ready to bring in the new year together...At one point my friends ex boyfriend sends her a text asking her if she would come spend new years with him, she reply's that she would rather stay where she is now, but out of sympathy she told him he could join us at the house party.

 

For the record this guy has never liked me...He always viewed me as a potential threat when he and my friend were dating, and even accused her of cheating on him with me on several occasions. Well needless to say he shows up about 15 minutes after they finish texting, Its now around 11:40am. The first thing he does is spot her and I standing together by the stereo...He come's over and grabs my friend and starts pulling her away, but it wasn't in a super aggressive way so I didn't think to much of it...I stood ideally by the stereo listening to the music playing, but watching them carfully as I never trusted him...

 

This is when it happend...In the midst of what appeard to be a realtivly heated argument from a distance, He rasies his hand slaps so hard across the face that she stumbles and falls backwards, Keep in mind this guy is my size about 6,1 190 to 200lbs she is 5,3 and maybe a 120lbs soaking wet...When this happend I just saw red, I remember it was like nothing I've ever felt before every action became instinctual my mind was blank, but somehow my body was in motion moving towards them he glanced up at me just as I was about two feet away from him, at which point I just wrapped my arms around him and we both slammed down onto a table which collapsed under our weight. He struggled to turn me over but I kept him pinned and then I just started slamming my fists into his face as hard as I could...I remember thinking that I was going to kill him, and I really intended to...I kept hitting and even when people started trying to pull me off of him I managed to maintain my posistion, eventually it took about 5 guys to pull me off.

 

The guy I attacked left the house with someone who offered to take him to the ER, I've since learned that I gave him a concussion, cracked one of his eye sockets and broke his nose in three different place's as well.

 

I hope that none of you get the impression im some kind of violent monster...I'm not, I normally battle with words long before I would ever raise my fist against someone. But I don't excatly know what this means, I don't think I've ever had such a strong reaction to anything in my life. Watching him slap her like that sent me into an animilistic rage that I've never experienced before. It was like total blackout anger all my mental facilities jump ship so instinct could take over...

 

My friend was obviously very upset at the situation as a whole. She hugged me tightly and told me that was the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for her but that she couldn't be there at the party anymore anymore. She said that she would call me later this week and we could talk about this more.

 

Now with the story told...

I can't help but wonder...Why was the reaction so strong? I've always loved my friend and always kind of had a crush on her, but this made me realize that maybe I'm really in love with her. I had felt so strongly about protecting her when everything went south it was unreal.

 

I'm also a little worried that she will be afraid of me now that she's seen my dark side...I've never acted violent in anyway around her, so I'm sure this was shocking for her to see.

 

Anyone who has any input her would be greatly appricated.

[Carenth]

Uh right... so why aren't you in police custody now for grievous bodily harm? Assuming this story is true which I'm finding a bit hard to believe I think the girl is the least of your worries I would be more worried about jail time and possible litigation from the guy you beat up.

 

If on the rare chance this is true what you did was not heroic imo. It was stupid and wreckless, call it animistic rage or blackout rage or whatever you made a choice to attack this guy. I very much doubt a jury would buy your story. I very much doubt a girl would like to see someone she knew even a ex-boyfriend beaten to a bloody pulp and then swing around into your arms.

 

Sorry just yeah not buying it sorry.

 

The very slim chance this is true, go get help you need it. Beating the **** out of someone then going "I'm not a violent guy" yeah... no.

Edited January 2, 2013 by Carenth

[bluenite]

That dude shouldn't haven slapped your friend. That said, his actions do not justify you beating him in the way you described. Simply moving him away or keeping him on the ground would have been fine. Going beyond that is assault.

 

For your sake I hope that either the guy you beat up didn't call the police or you have a good lawyer.

[SmileFace]

It means that you may be locked up.

 

It seems that you have known this girl for a long time and cared for her - I am pretty sure you would have done the same for any other close friend. However don't over think the actions - you know your self ... do you want more with this girl?

[carhill]

What does it mean?

 

These days it usually means battery charges and a lawsuit. Wailing on someone has consequences. Mitigating circumstances may be coming to the defense of another who was assaulted. Hope it was worth it.

 

Why was the reaction so strong?

 

Sure, it might be your attraction to her. It might be a red tape that surfaced at that moment which was buried in your subconscious and the assault was the trigger. It might be defending your best female friend. It might be a lot of things in combination.

 

Most women are well aware of how violent men can be and the damage we can do so I doubt that your actions, in general, were a surprise as to content. Even those of us who embrace non-violence have our moments and, during them, it's the same stuff that keeps us alive on the battlefield. It's in our genes. Survival.

 

Hope it works out.

[Carenth]

Offtopic for a second: Loveshack running really slow for anyone made a good garble mess of my edit in the last post

[MercuryMorrison1]

Uh right... so why aren't you in police custody now for grievous bodily harm? Assuming this story is true which I'm finding a bit hard to believe I think the girl is the least of your worries I would be more worried about jail time and possible litigation from the guy you beat up.

 

If on the rare chance this is true what you did was not heroic imo. It was stupid and wreckless, call it animistic rage or blackout rage or whatever you made a choice to attack this guy. I very much doubt a jury would buy your story. I very much doubt a girl would like to see someone she knew even a ex-boyfriend beaten to a bloody pulp and then swing around into your arms.

 

Sorry just yeah not buying it sorry.

 

The very slim chance this is true, go get help you need it. Beating the **** out of someone then going "I'm not a violent guy" yeah... no.

 

You're consistent accusation that the story is a sham doesn't change anything...And of course I'm worried about going to jail, if you think for one second that I would make this kind of **** up you're sorley mistaken. I'm not happy about it, nor am I proud of my actions. But im not perfect...I lost cool in the worst possible way at the worst possible time.

 

You can bring all the psychiatry you want into and tell me what really happend and what didn't happen...But the simple fact is, nothing in this story is a lie, I'm not a good enough liar to make up something seemingly so elaborate.

 

Regaurdless, beleive what you want to beleive its your right.

[Carenth]

You're consistent accusation that the story is a sham doesn't change anything...And of course I'm worried about going to jail, if you think for one second that I would make this kind of **** up you're sorley mistaken. I'm not happy about it, nor am I proud of my actions. But im not perfect...I lost cool in the worst possible way at the worst possible time.

 

You can bring all the psychiatry you want into and tell me what really happend and what didn't happen...But the simple fact is, nothing in this story is a lie, I'm not a good enough liar to make up something seemingly so elaborate.

 

Regaurdless, beleive what you want to beleive its your right.

 

Sorry I was trying to edit that post and it got garbled in mass lag from loveshack only meant to write once I found your story hard to believe.

 

The reason I thought that is you are posting asking "what do you think this girl thinks of me" after beating the **** out of someone. You got your priorities all wrong I would be getting a good lawyer, going to anger/violence management, psychiatrist to try and figure out wtf happened doing these things might actually help you if a law suit comes along.

 

Your absolute lack of remorse or omission of possible consequences for what you did in your first post and made me think this was some heroic male fantasy post hoping to get praise from the masses for what a manly man you were.

 

What this guy did yeah not acceptable at all, what you did was even worse.

[gaius]

Since he slapped her first he might try to avoid bringing in the police which could work in your favor. Honestly, good for you if you manage to get away with it and don't get sued. Sounds like the guy needed exactly what you gave him.

[todreaminblue]

I had a guy come to my defense once actually it was twice,he was a bouncer now my ex......once when three rather large girls had my head and was smashing my head into a toilet bowl because i came to the aid of another friend and we didn't have any more money to buy them drinks...my friend ran out and got him....he merely extracted me from the toilet bowl looked at them asked them to leave and not come back in super calm scary voice....they left........i went to the emergency room.......the second was another female who was picking on my sister my sister was young and lving with me i was responsible for her.....i was also pregnant 8.5 months actually i postioned myself between her and my sister she attacked me i merely defended myself....didnt throw any punches she was smaller than me...again he merely extracted me and asked her to leave which she did....i ahev had fights with guys.........no man has been around nor would i want ta guy to get in trouble for me or get hurt....if a guy started fighting and i have done this, i put myself in the middle I cannot stand by and watch anyone get hit or hurt or in trouble........i normally get hurt but the fight dissipates...some people would class this as foolhardy to come between guys fighting...... but it is reflex for me ill freeze and then i do it.....i have covered a guy on the ground.......he was a junkie who asked for money..five dollars to be exact.i pleaded from the ground....i won.......i dont care...no one deserves to be pounded....especially not for me or in front of me....something clicks when i see people street fight...i dont think its sweet...and yeah i am in their shoes been there...im the one wanting help......so no...not cool...not on....not good.....if you are fighting for your life, its different no honor in that it no holds barred survival.....otherwise if it isnt a life or death situation you give the stop command, then you restrain, then you ask them to leave or you leave...no mess no fuss....over...if they keep picking and throw that first punch you defend yourself and others..no one person deserves mutilation..even the bad guys......unless there is no other way..........deb

[2sunny]

And what it further tells you is that SHE ALLOWS him to abuse her.

[MercuryMorrison1]

Sorry I was trying to edit that post and it got garbled in mass lag from loveshack only meant to write once I found your story hard to believe.

 

The reason I thought that is you are posting asking "what do you think this girl thinks of me" after beating the **** out of someone. You got your priorities all wrong I would be getting a good lawyer, going to anger/violence management, psychiatrist to try and figure out wtf happened doing these things might actually help you if a law suit comes along.

 

Your absolute lack of remorse or omission of possible consequences for what you did in your first post and made me think this was some heroic male fantasy post hoping to get praise from the masses for what a manly man you were.

 

What this guy did yeah not acceptable at all, what you did was even worse.

 

Thank you for the thoughtful reply.

 

And this post is in absolutly no way some macho man fantasy post looking for undeserved praise. Perhaps you got the wrong impression from my first post...I do feel remorse for banging the guy up so bad, I hate that it happend the way it did, but that can't be changed now. As of right now I have no idea if he intends to press charges or not only time will tell.

 

Its hard to express remorse or omission over the internet. If we were talking about this face to face I think your first impression would likely have been quite different.

[todreaminblue]

And what it further tells you is that SHE ALLOWS him to abuse her.

 

How does it say that exactly?

[gaius]

I like how our society is so messed up that you're supposed to express remorse for beating up a guy who hit a woman for no reason.

[MercuryMorrison1]

Well he basically goes like this, "HEY, HITTING ANOTHER PERSON IS BAD!" Then walks up and beats the crap out of that person. Hopefully, to everyone's relief, you'll both be locked up.

 

Hopefully we will...We both deserve to be.

[todreaminblue]

F-u-c-k you...If your just going to call me name's take your **** elsewhere.

 

 

 

You have anger issues.....that can get you in huge trouble buddy .......i suggest you seek therapy..defending people takes restraint and thought not blind rage"seeing red"...deb

[Crusoe]

OP, don't sweat it, pretty natural reaction to seeing a woman you care about attacked by a fella near twice her size. Take any punishment on the chin and forget it. If there's ever a next time, try to avoid hitting someone once they're down, no matter how much of an ar*ehole they may be.

Edited January 3, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[ThaWholigan]

You probably shouldn't have beat him up so bad. Still, he did deserve a smack in the mouth. Had it been any woman I know and care about on some level, I would have intervened too. Sh+t, if it was a male friend I would have intervened on some level too.

[todreaminblue]

Better an assualt charge than being the kind of worm that stands around watching a woman beat upon.

 

OP, don't sweat it, pretty natural reaction to seeing a woman you care about attacked by a fella near twice her size. Take any punishment on the chin and forget it. If there's ever a next time, try to avoid hitting someone once they're down, no matter how much of an ar*ehole they may be.

 

 

An assault charge for a slap to the face that could lead to a permanent record that limits job opportunities in the future....nah not worth it...i do believe it is good to stand up for a woman and commendable if it isnt solving violence with violence....or pounding someone while they are already down...but letting the guy know violence is a no go zone....not lowering himself to the gutter to prove a point.......doesn't prove anything except lack of self control......and discipline....fighters, true fighters have discipline..and you dont have to be an animal to show masculinity....deb

[todreaminblue]

I like how our society is so messed up that you're supposed to express remorse for beating up a guy who hit a woman for no reason.

 

 

its not a societal law....its a biblical one.....deb

[todreaminblue]

YES! Using the Bible to justify actions! Alright!

 

 

Justifying what exactly...

....◄ Matthew 5:39 ►

But I say unto you, That you resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite you on your right cheek, turn to him the other also.

 

 

It was a slap, a hard slap probably, but not deservign of what he did adn it was pure revenge and rage....societal law is more about yeah pound him get that piece of crap ....the bible says more about restraint that is not justifying his actions.......and you are supposed to forgive those who wrong you...i have forgiven more than just a slap.....its a lot harder to do actually..but int he long run....the right thing to do..i would hoep a guy would stand up for me if he witnessed me getting slapped silly but not with a ground and pound ........deb

[ChessPieceFace]

Hopefully your boyfriend in prison will come to your defense just like you came to hers.

[MercuryMorrison1]

Hopefully your boyfriend in prison will come to your defense just like you came to hers.

 

Kind of like I stood up for your mom?

 

...Give a stupid anwser, recive a stupid response...

[suladas]

Hitting a women isn't something I will stand for, if I seen it, I would be hitting the guy but only once unless he tried to hit back, to avoid charges or issues if you only hit once you have nothing to worry about. It happened at a party at your friends right? You have witnesses to ALL back you up and make SURE he is the bad guy, not saying to lie but to spin it to make sure you were protecting her. Really depends how bad of shape he's in if you have to worry about charges. I've seen it plenty of times over the years and never any charges, even when it happens in public locations. You crossed the line going that far, but still there is NEVER any excuse to hit a women.

[MercuryMorrison1]

You folded a guy up for stepping out of line.. alright..

 

Why come on the internet to brag about it?

You could have at least been brief, but it makes you look like an idiot writing a running commentary on the fight..

 

I'm a boxer, set to have my first professional fight in April, I've just starting MMA training too, so I'm a fighter... you would imagine I can relate, right?

 

No, you're a D-bag.

 

...Oh im sorry does your comment serve some purpose? I kind of zoned out when you accused me of being a braggit douche bag then contradict yourself by stating how your a pro boxer.