NGC1300 Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 They say it's cowardly and selfish, but it's my life, and if I don't see any good in it, why is it even in death I'm going to be ridiculed for the action? I understand people have it worse; I understand there are children dying of starvation and disease. I understand all that and I think it's terrible. But my life brings no joy, and honestly if it wasn't for my parents I probably would have done it years ago. I feel like there is too much to change and the barriers seem too tall and numerous to overcome. Why is wanting out such a bad thing? Link to post Share on other sites
HurtinUnit Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 this will be my last post, period. The reason why suicide is thought of as wrong, or selfish is because it is. I attempted suicide a few years back, I swallowed a bottle of aspirin and then half a bottle of sleeping pills. Someone happened to come into my bedroom and found me unconscious and unresponsive. I spent over a week in the hospital and then a psych ward. None of what I endured in the hospital, or anything that I was even running away from could ever touch the pain and guilt I felt having to face people who actually gave a crap about me afterwards. Anyone who cares about you, anyone you care about, for the rest of their lives will always wonder what THEY did wrong. You are leaving people behind who will forever blame themselves. No matter how you end it, no matter what you leave in a note, anyone who cares will be condemned to the pain of wondering why or what they could have done to prevent it. For the rest of their lives. It is by far the most selfish act one can commit. Unless of course someone is terminally ill, or will experience physical pain for the rest of their lives. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author NGC1300 Posted January 2, 2013 Author Share Posted January 2, 2013 It is by far the most selfish act one can commit. Unless of course someone is terminally ill, or will experience physical pain for the rest of their lives. Actually it would seem HIGHLY selfish for anyone to dictate what is better for others. Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 would you feel betrayed and abandoned if your mother/father/child/spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend decided their life wasn't worth it and killed themselves because its THEIR choice and nobody else matters? If not, then I would encourage you to seek counseling, please. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 If you suffer from depression you should get help. Link to post Share on other sites
Ross MwcFan Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 this will be my last post, period. The reason why suicide is thought of as wrong, or selfish is because it is. I attempted suicide a few years back, I swallowed a bottle of aspirin and then half a bottle of sleeping pills. Someone happened to come into my bedroom and found me unconscious and unresponsive. I spent over a week in the hospital and then a psych ward. None of what I endured in the hospital, or anything that I was even running away from could ever touch the pain and guilt I felt having to face people who actually gave a crap about me afterwards. Anyone who cares about you, anyone you care about, for the rest of their lives will always wonder what THEY did wrong. You are leaving people behind who will forever blame themselves. No matter how you end it, no matter what you leave in a note, anyone who cares will be condemned to the pain of wondering why or what they could have done to prevent it. For the rest of their lives. It is by far the most selfish act one can commit. Unless of course someone is terminally ill, or will experience physical pain for the rest of their lives. Do you think that wanting someone to carry on living, who is suffering so badly that they'd rather be dead, is selfish? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 I've always wondered why more people don't die in their sleep. Answer: The organism is hard-wired to continue, even fighting against sickness and injury to continue. Given the natural state which exists within the organism, as cognitive beings we recognize that its continuance is part of the natural order of things and arbitrarily terminating it is 'wrong', whether at the hand of oneself or that of another. I pondered these things when approving the morphine drip which would end my mother's life. Her hard-wiring had kept her alive far beyond the quality of life a reasonable person would expect to have. It's a tough decision to make sometimes. I tend to side with the wiring which keeps me breathing while I'm asleep at night, no matter how hard the days may be. Perhaps someday that perspective will change. I doubt the general impression of suicide being 'wrong' will change any time soon. Best wishes in your journey. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Ross MwcFan Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 I personally don't see that as selfish. Perhaps, on some angle it is, but when you factor in the permanence of death, and realize that suffering is often temporary and what can seem like a mountain today may seem like a molehill in a few months, with help. Why would wanting someone you love and care for to live rather than die be selfish, especially when they have a choice? OP, I don't like to give advice on these kinds of topics because I'm in no way qualified to help you in the way you need, and I will advise that you seek help for this. A choice in what? Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 My brother commited suicide and it is the most painful thing I've gone through to this date. He was 25 years old. Not to mention what it did to my parents. I hope you get help. What seems awful this minute, this hour, this day, could completely change for you tomorrow. Please don't do it. Link to post Share on other sites
Ross MwcFan Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 In whether they live or die. This is the thing, most people who want to commit suicide feel like they don't really have much of a choice. Link to post Share on other sites
Anela Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 This is the thing, most people who want to commit suicide feel like they don't really have much of a choice. Or that life is too painful for them. I know I've felt that way, but then I've also noticed survival instincts kicking in under certain circumstances. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Car hill wrote about being hardwired to continue, i believe this to eb true, the human psyche is hardiwred nto onoly fro yrou sefl btu the people who are in yoru life yoru life touches theres if you leave theres a void there that stains everything with darkness and far outlasts your life, it outlasts the life of the children you will never raise, their childrens children and the ripple of the void explodes with the the people you will never touch and the differences you will never make, the poems you never write and the comfort you never give,its nto a judgement its just a fact....... ill tell one story i have more but this one seems appropriate,its got a sting but the truth often does,i decided to leave after i was gang raped this is well over twenty years now, i was molested as a child and this experience that i had when i was older rocked me more, one because i felt i was cursed,i was alone, didn't have someone to talk to about it, my step father had already informed me i coudlnt come back home because i left them navy i had made my bed now i had to lie in it.......i used to go down and listen to the masts of the sailing boats on the bay ringing out when the wind was strong it was soothing to m eth eonly real place int eh city i felt peace, thats where i got raped.......so after they had finished i went home and i gave up didnt go to the police didnt go to the hospital, just gave up, didnt go to work for over a week(i wasnt able to had cigarette burns on me, got infected), i just stopped eating drinking , had no desire too, after a few days the next door neighbour a guy , got worried he hadnt seen me and we normally spoke on a daily basis just a hello....a smile, a friendly wave,, he broke in after i told him to go away,the story is long so i am going to shorten it here........he saved my life, now if he hadnt have broken in i wouldnt have made it I am grateful that he did, I went on to have five children,quite a few more mishaps but i had five children who now have grandchildren who are gorgeous, i affected that guy,the one who saved me , without a doubt and his gentle touch in the world is why i am typing to you now,i actually affect quite a few people even though i am not important in the scheme of things, i have my place, without me in the world, there's a void, and that void would touch many lives if i let it be come into existence.......just like there will be a void in your place, an empty nothingness with no warmth of touch or love or pain or tears or fears or ultimately comfort to another, you have a purpose, you just dont know what it is, one day YOU WILL KNOW...havent told many that, maybe one of my touches was to share it with you give you a little hope in the presence of a painful story....i always have hope because there si always an epiphany of hope in hopelessness.... love and many hugs.....deb 3 Link to post Share on other sites
SpiralOut Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 It's not ethical to support a person's choice to kill themself. Think of the amount of guilt, regret, remorse, possible time in jail that you're asking someone to take upon themselves by telling you "oh yeah it's just fine to kill yourself, go ahead!" I'm not going to judge someone for having suicidal thoughts. Thoughts are just thoughts. Feelings are feelings and can't be controlled; I don't blame anyone for wanting a way out. Actually following through with it, though, that's a different matter. I don't support the act of suicide. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 I don't get it. I admit it. I understand being sad; feeling worthless; being lost and confused. But there are other choices. You want something different? Make something different happen. Go somewhere you've never been. Do something you've never done. Even if you don't feel like it, just force yourself to do it. If your life is truly horrible, grab a bag and hitchhike away from it. See where you end up. Death is such a final decision. You never get another chance to do something different. If what you are doing isn't working for you - do something else! Link to post Share on other sites
Ross MwcFan Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 It's not ethical to support a person's choice to kill themself. Think of the amount of guilt, regret, remorse, possible time in jail that you're asking someone to take upon themselves by telling you "oh yeah it's just fine to kill yourself, go ahead!" I'm not going to judge someone for having suicidal thoughts. Thoughts are just thoughts. Feelings are feelings and can't be controlled; I don't blame anyone for wanting a way out. Actually following through with it, though, that's a different matter. I don't support the act of suicide. I don't think it's ethical to force someone to live, it's quite cruel and disturbing really. Link to post Share on other sites
Ross MwcFan Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 I don't get it. I admit it. I understand being sad; feeling worthless; being lost and confused. But there are other choices. You want something different? Make something different happen. Go somewhere you've never been. Do something you've never done. Even if you don't feel like it, just force yourself to do it. If your life is truly horrible, grab a bag and hitchhike away from it. See where you end up. Death is such a final decision. You never get another chance to do something different. If what you are doing isn't working for you - do something else! That wouldn't really work. Link to post Share on other sites
Ross MwcFan Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 If it's not ethical to let someone die, then why do we put pets down who are suffering for ethical reasons? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sweetkiwi Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 I've had two uncles who killed themselves. My dad's brother was very young and just going through some really hard times. He never let anyone see how sad he really was. My mom's brother was depressed and taking very hard drugs for weeks on end. The both used guns to end their own lives. Its extremely sad. And families who go through it always feel cheated from their loved ones. I do not think I could help someone commit suicide. But I suppose I would try to help if at all possible. Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 I don't think it's ethical to force someone to live, it's quite cruel and disturbing really. It depends on the health of the person. If a person is suicidal but physically healthy then they are mentally ill. If they get help for that they would be less likely to be suicidal. But if someone is in poor health and wouldn't live if they weren't hooked up to a machine then that is a whole other animal. I don't consider that suicide. I call that a living will. Link to post Share on other sites
Ross MwcFan Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 It depends on the health of the person. If a person is suicidal but physically healthy then they are mentally ill. If they get help for that they would be less likely to be suicidal. But if someone is in poor health and wouldn't live if they weren't hooked up to a machine then that is a whole other animal. I don't consider that suicide. I call that a living will. I agree that if they're mentally ill, then they should be given help for it over helping them or letting them commit suicide. But if there isn't anything that can help them, and they'll probably continue to be that way for the rest of their lives... Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 I don't get it. I admit it. I understand being sad; feeling worthless; being lost and confused. But there are other choices. You want something different? Make something different happen. Go somewhere you've never been. Do something you've never done. Even if you don't feel like it, just force yourself to do it. If your life is truly horrible, grab a bag and hitchhike away from it. See where you end up. Death is such a final decision. You never get another chance to do something different. If what you are doing isn't working for you - do something else! From what i know the last thing thing you want to do when you are suicidal is something, complete absence of motivation or the will to live,you certainly dont want to go back packing and find something to do , its when you dont have any hope at all for anything , anyone or even yourself,its a bad place for a reason........the poster has motivation to type to post to write, to debate the point.......thats a a start..he wants to hear reasons to be motivated....he is affected...he hasnt given up yet.........deb 3 Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 But if there isn't anything that can help them, and they'll probably continue to be that way for the rest of their lives... How would it be possible for there to be nothing that could help them? Unless they've tried EVERYTHING, they don't know that. Mental illness is usually able to be improved, if not cured. I know many many people who are very happy now who at one point attempted or considered suicide. My reasons for suicide being wrong have nothing to do with how it affects others. It's just a cop-out. There is so much beauty and joy in the world. So many things to experience. So much to see. So much to do. Just saying "no thanks" or "I can't" and choosing to opt out of trying to get better is a pussy move. It's the ultimate in weakness. I think people should demand more of themselves than that. And if they are truly in a place where they feel completely hopeless, they need HELP, not death. Find help. Call 911 and say you are thinking about killing yourself and let people help you if you aren't in a place where you can help yourself. Call a family member and let THEM help you. Call a hotline. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 I agree that if they're mentally ill, then they should be given help for it over helping them or letting them commit suicide. But if there isn't anything that can help them, and they'll probably continue to be that way for the rest of their lives... That sounds like a cop out. Unless they've exhausted themselves by trying to get well then yeah maybe. But there are ways to get well. Mental health is tricky. People won't seek it sometimes because they aren't in their right frame of mind. It's like, no joke, there's something wrong in their head. They aren't thinking clearly so they don't get the help they need. It's a sad sad thing. Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 From what i know the last thing thing you want to do when you are suicidal is something, complete absence of motivation or the will to live,you certainly dont want to go back packing and find something to do , its when you dont have any hope at all for anything , anyone or even yourself,its a bad place for a reason........the poster has motivation to type to post to write, to debate the point.......thats a a start..he wants to hear reasons to be motivated....he is affected...he hasnt given up yet.........deb I understand that there is a lack of motivation. I get that. But if someone is in a position where they truly think their life just sucks and there's no reason to live it, it's time to do SOMETHING different. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 If it's not ethical to let someone die, then why do we put pets down who are suffering for ethical reasons? Ross, you're an intelligent young man, but this from you is puerile. There is a difference between euthanasia and suicide. Euthanasia is usually for very understandable and often sound, sensible and logical reasons. Suicide isn't. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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