Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

[revitup]

My experience tells me that BPDr's (mine at least) know exactly WHAT they are doing.....I don't believe they know WHY they doing it.

[aMguilts]

My experience tells me that BPDr's (mine at least) know exactly WHAT they are doing.....I don't believe they know WHY they doing it.

 

revitup

 

Maybe (your) does know exactly what he/she is doing...but they don`t know WHY they are doing it?

Isn`t that a condradiction in terms?

Doesn`t that just define BPD in a nutshell?

 

What makes 1 persons actions accountable or justifyable may not be to someone else`s `view` of what is right or `acceptable`

Doesn`t make that person right or wrong does it?

Maybe it`s wrong in your eyes, but for the person with BPD, they `see` it as right.

And who can say that they aren`t right? Who`s to say that you are?

 

One thing you are right about... yes this IS a very interesting thread:)

 

aM

[NoMoreJerks]

Who cares about motives. What matters is their actions. Anyone who does what BDPers and NPDers do, for whatever reason (intentional or not, consciously or not), is a horribly messed up person who should be isolated and left to themselves. Sometimes I feel like deep down that is what they want, but they can't live with that either. They need the attention, the drama, etc. But at the same time, they don't want to let anyone get close to them, so they yo-yo between hot and cold, push and pull, and make our lives a living hell. They should be left alone, completely isolated from society, IMO. Sorry, harsh, but that's the way to go, if you want to avoid messing up more people in the process of "reaching out" to those messed up people who really have no hope, nor any desire, to be fixed.

[aMguilts]

Who cares about motives. What matters is their actions. Anyone who does what BDPers and NPDers do, for whatever reason (intentional or not, consciously or not), is a horribly messed up person who should be isolated and left to themselves. Sometimes I feel like deep down that is what they want, but they can't live with that either. They need the attention, the drama, etc. But at the same time, they don't want to let anyone get close to them, so they yo-yo between hot and cold, push and pull, and make our lives a living hell. They should be left alone, completely isolated from society, IMO. Sorry, harsh, but that's the way to go, if you want to avoid messing up more people in the process of "reaching out" to those messed up people who really have no hope, nor any desire, to be fixed.

 

really?

Maybe with your such a strong view on it, you are in the wrong?

 

While we are at it, how many more people do you want to `isolate`??

depressives?

bi polars?

uni polars even?

lets not stop there?

How about people with cancer? lets `isolate` them too?

Or shall we just isolate EVERYONE that doesn`t conform with `normal` human behaviour?

lol.. EVERYONE would be in isolation!

 

What an attitude you have

Better to turn away than to face it head on and help isn`t it?

 

aM

[NoMoreJerks]

really?

Maybe with your such a strong view on it, you are in the wrong?

 

While we are at it, how many more people do you want to `isolate`??

depressives?

bi polars?

uni polars even?

lets not stop there?

How about people with cancer? lets `isolate` them too?

Or shall we just isolate EVERYONE that doesn`t conform with `normal` human behaviour?

lol.. EVERYONE would be in isolation!

 

What an attitude you have

Better to turn away than to face it head on and help isn`t it?

 

aM

People who are depressed, who are bipolar, etc, all realize that they have a problem and seek treatment. Unlike BPDers and NPDers who go on with their lives ruining everyone and everything in their view. You don't appear to have experienced life/relationship with a BPDer or a NPDer. Or you are a BPDer / NPDer, who loves playing the victim card (typical) and accusing others of being assh*les. And spare us the comparisons with cancer, and all the fallacies that appeal to emotions.It's not making your case stronger.

 

Stay and help? You must be insane, or simply a BPDer / NPDer who wants to be told that it's ok that they treat people like sh*t. Yes, it might be hard to live with someone with depression or bipolar disorder, but you know what? No, they should not be isolated, because the overwhelming majority of them know that they have a problem and DO go into treatment with a GENUINE desire to be cured/ bring their problem under control. Good luck with doing that with a BPDer/NPDer. I ain't gonna play this game of voluntary torture with them. You can do so if you wish.

[aMguilts]

People who are depressed, who are bipolar, etc, all realize that they have a problem and seek treatment. Unlike BPDers and NPDers who go on with their lives ruining everyone and everything in their view. You don't appear to have experienced life/relationship with a BPDer or a NPDer. Or you are a BPDer / NPDer, who loves playing the victim card (typical) and accusing others of being assh*les. And spare us the comparisons with cancer, and all the fallacies that appeal to emotions.It's not making your case stronger.

 

Stay and help? You must be insane, or simply a BPDer / NPDer who wants to be told that it's ok that they treat people like sh*t. Yes, it might be hard to live with someone with depression or bipolar disorder, but you know what? No, they should not be isolated, because the overwhelming majority of them know that they have a problem and DO go into treatment with a GENUINE desire to be cured/ bring their problem under control. Good luck with doing that with a BPDer/NPDer. I ain't gonna play this game of voluntary torture with them. You can do so if you wish.

 

i play my own `card` in life and not judge others

No one is forcing you to `stay and help`.

To see just 1 side is not right... IMO

As for `making my case stronger`... that is something that someone with BPD would say, not someone that wants to `isolate` them.

To make such a statement in your defense just goes to show that you are neither wanting to help or indeed have the capacity too

 

I`m not making excuses for that certain type of behaviour. There is always 2 sides to everything.

Right and wrong.

What you deem to be wrong may not seem that way to someone else.

and vice versa.

Doesn`t make you more right by saying what you just said. Ergo, it doesn`t make you more wrong either.

It`s how you deal with ppl like that that matters.

(like me for instance)

 

To say `put them in isolation` is ludicrous.

How will that help? out of sight , out of mind?

 

aM

[Anela]

Ugh. Last year, I wa wondering if I might have BPD. I was wondering if it could come on suddenly, or if my responses were natural given my circumstances - and I've been too nervous to get therapy on my own. I wanted therapy with my sister and my mother, due to things that have happened in the past couple of years, and then to talk to someone else about anything that didn't involve them.

 

I used to isolate myself, hell I was agoraphobic for years. Extremely socially phobic. The only symptom I ever felt of BPD, was the fears of the abandonment/rejection - people tend to like me, but after being moved away from my father, and having to live my grandmother (who berated me regularly) I didn't want my mother going out and night and leaving me - she ended up punishing me for that, thinking I just wanted attention, when I was most likely dealing with a natural separation anxiety. I was also almost killed by one of her boyfriends, and then bullied at school, as well as living with a sociopathic ******* who almost drove my mother crazy. Fun times! Even with all that, I managed to maintain a basic level of emotional health, and when my parents were busy, I was alone all day and a good portion of the night with no problems - this was in my teens and twenties.

 

Now, when I'm stressed, I need to get out of the house. I need to be around people, without interacting with them - but I also feel pressured to do all sorts of things, like I'm running out of time. I've dealt with **** from my sister, hostility every single day that we're around each other, and my mother's drinking has escalated in the past two years, and she's mean when she's drunk (and I worry about losing her). I had my heart broken a few years ago, and it seems that the new fun pastime for people in my life, is to break my heart. My dad is one of the few, when it comes to family, who has told me that I'm fine and that he sees what's happening - and then I flip out when I'm really stressed, run out into the woods, or somewhere else, and I feel suicidal - I calm down when I'm on the move. this is something that I related to when I read a book by someone who is apparently now living a good life, even though she has BPD.

 

When I read that I should be isolated, that I shouldn't be around anyone else, and I should rot in my own fears - well, it just makes it seem like my suicidal feelings are something that should be acted on. I'm having a good day today, but two days ago, I felt utterly repulsive. I just curled up on the couch until I fell asleep, after hiding in the bath tub for a few hours, so that I wouldn't flip out, and wouldn't hurt myself (I was laying in that tub, looking at the shower hose as a potential noose, and that's when I got out of there). As I told freestyle, elsewhere, when you feel *that* repulsive, then you don't see any point to seeing someone about it. My sister is a selfish, abusive little twat, and yet I wouldn't want her to be isolated, even though any good traits that she possesses are invisible to me now. My mother backed up her BS, because she was afraid of losing her, all because she is in lurve with an old pervert who has hit on me more than once - so I've been in "I'm drowning, not waving" territory, and getting my head stepped on, because I'm supposedly so strong, and expected to take it.

 

I feel like ****, much of the time, and as though I have no future - and why should I, if I actually do possess symptoms of this Borderline Personality Disorder? Apparently, I'm just a stain on humanity, as are people who have been dealing with this all of their lives. We can't possibly have anything good to offer, right? I feel *huge* amounts of empathy, guilt and shame. I know the world doesn't revolve around me. I'm not out to hurt anyone, I'm just trying to feel better.

[NoMoreJerks]

i play my own `card` in life and not judge others

No one is forcing you to `stay and help`.

To see just 1 side is not right... IMO

As for `making my case stronger`... that is something that someone with BPD would say, not someone that wants to `isolate` them.

To make such a statement in your defense just goes to show that you are neither wanting to help or indeed have the capacity too

 

I`m not making excuses for that certain type of behaviour. There is always 2 sides to everything.

Right and wrong.

What you deem to be wrong may not seem that way to someone else.

and vice versa.

Doesn`t make you more right by saying what you just said. Ergo, it doesn`t make you more wrong either.

It`s how you deal with ppl like that that matters.

(like me for instance)

 

To say `put them in isolation` is ludicrous.

How will that help? out of sight , out of mind?

 

aM

Ah yeah, more relativist talk.. it's all relative, eh? There is no good and bad behaviour, after all... No. It's all relative, and depends on who is thinking about it... right? I call bullsh*t on that. Sh*tty behaviour is sh*tty no matter who you ask (unless that person that you asked has BPD or NPD himself/herself). Give me a break. There's decent, civilized behaviour, and then there's sh*tty, selfish, dickish behaviour.

 

As for me wanting/not wanting to help: I ABSOLUTELY DO NOT -- and I cannot stress this enough - DO NOT want to help someone with BPD/NPD. Nope. Never. F*ck that. F*ck helping. F*ck being nice to someone with BPD/NPD. I gotta look out for my own mental, emotional, and physical health. I sacrificed enough of that for the past 6 months, for someone with NPD-BPD, and I ain't doing that again, not for one more second. I don't know what that makes me: cruel, a b*ch, or whatever else you can think of. It doesn't matter what you, or the person with NPD/BPD thinks it makes me. What matters is what it really makes me: SANE.

[NoMoreJerks]

Anela, first off, you do not strike me as BPD. And 99.99% of people with BPD or NPD do NOT entertain the possibility that there is a problem with them, or admit that they do have BPD/NPD, even if they might go into therapy. And when they do go to therapy, they do it in order to manipulate their partner, and throughout the sessions, they manipulate both their partner and the therapist. There just is no winning with these people. There just isn't. I'm sorry, but there isn't. I mean, I would've been the first to wish that this weren't true, but it is what it is, and there is no use going insane over someone when you can't help them. They are just beyond help, for one reason or another. They do not want to be fixed, and whatever the reason for their inability and unwillingness to change, who am I to say that they should do otherwise??

 

When I read that I should be isolated, that I shouldn't be around anyone else, and I should rot in my own fears - well, it just makes it seem like my suicidal feelings are something that should be acted on.

Someone who is BPD/NPD should be isolated, not you. You do not strike me as BPD. Not everyone who is depressed or has mood swings/is stressed has BPD or NPD. That said, if someone will commit suicide because they are feeling isolated, and if they are not isolated, they will wreck my life, I say: better them than me.

[NoMoreJerks]

How will that help? out of sight , out of mind?

Pure self-preservation. My parents did not bring me to life so that I would throw away my life in an attempt to fix someone who does not want to be fixed. I do not want to suffer for someone who is not worth it, who does not appreciate it, who thinks my efforts to fix him are selfish, and who has no qualms discarding me at whim. Nope, sorry, I'm a survivalist. I want to have a good life, be happy, have children -- not throw my life away. There is too much to live for, to be happy for. I do not wish to make my life a living hell. Do you realize that I have so many white hairs (at the age of 29), that started appearing in the past 2-3 months, because of my experience with my NPD-BPD ex? No, I can do without that. He can go kill himself and I wouldn't give a sh*t at this point. I am serious. I love the person I thought he was, and I pine for that person, but not for who he really was. I need to stop trying to fix people, especially ones who don't want to be fixed. I have a caretaker personality, and I need to shift the focus onto myself, and take care of myself now. I tried fixing my ex, I tried supporting him, I tried so hard. But now it's time to throw in the towel on these people and support myself, love myself.

Edited January 19, 2013 by NoMoreJerks

[M30USA]

Anela, first off, you do not strike me as BPD. And 99.99% of people with BPD or NPD do NOT entertain the possibility that there is a problem with them, or admit that they do have BPD/NPD, even if they might go into therapy. And when they do go to therapy, they do it in order to manipulate their partner, and throughout the sessions, they manipulate both their partner and the therapist. There just is no winning with these people. There just isn't. I'm sorry, but there isn't. I mean, I would've been the first to wish that this weren't true, but it is what it is, and there is no use going insane over someone when you can't help them. They are just beyond help, for one reason or another. They do not want to be fixed, and whatever the reason for their inability and unwillingness to change, who am I to say that they should do otherwise??

 

 

Someone who is BPD/NPD should be isolated, not you. You do not strike me as BPD. Not everyone who is depressed or has mood swings/is stressed has BPD or NPD. That said, if someone will commit suicide because they are feeling isolated, and if they are not isolated, they will wreck my life, I say: better them than me.

 

If a BPDer truly humbled themselves before God and asked for deliverance from their disorder, it would happen. I have seen it happen. But I think what people on here have been saying is that, for whatever reason, they just DON'T. In fact, they are more likely to PRIDE themselves on how they are. They might even receive praise for it by family and friends--especially if their disorder makes them a pushy business person or helps them succeed in competitive things. This is part of the deception and reason why BPD has an abysmal recovery chance. They believe their disorder is actually a positive personality trait.

[NoMoreJerks]

If a BPDer truly humbled themselves before God and asked for deliverance from their disorder, it would happen. I have seen it happen. But I think what people on here have been saying is that, for whatever reason, they just DON'T. In fact, they are more likely to PRIDE themselves on how they are. They might even receive praise for it by family and friends--especially if their disorder makes them a pushy business person or helps them succeed in competitive things. This is part of the deception and reason why BPD has an abysmal recovery chance. They believe their disorder is actually a positive personality trait.

I don't know about that God comment. I am an atheist. But you are right about them thinking that their disorder is actually a positive personality trait... reinforced by society and the people around them. The other problem is, IMO, people who think that by embracing such people, rather than isolating them, they are doing them good, when in fact they are doing them, and themselves, more harm than good.

 

It's like people with BPD/NPD are programmed in such a way so as to prevent the disorder from ever being treated; an evolutionary "defense" mechanism of sorts. It's insane. They're insane. I don't want to have to deal with anyone remotely showing characteristics/traits of a BPD/NPD. I will run for the hills the next time any man shows any symptoms of either of those 2 disorders... even if they are not actually suffering from those disorders.

[revitup]

I also believe this BPD is a spiritual attack on a person.I know God could make a BPDr whole,I also know God is the ONLY way a BPDr will ever be whole.There may be one therapy that will help mask the symptoms of this nightmare,but even that won't last unless the BPDr is spiritually sound.

 

Anela,I also do not believe you are BPD.You seem too interested in actually getting better,you are on a post seeking input and putting your true feelings out for review.There never (18 yrs with mine) was one time in which my STBXWW BPDr actually tried to be truthful with a therapist or Dr.You have a future,you can get beyond this thing you struggle with,simply because you are fighting to get understanding.BPDr's do not try to get "better" in my view.

 

Any time we made any progress (in spite of her gaslighting the Dr and me constantly)It would end in her running away from any professional who got close to the real issues in her past and her behaviors.She simply likes being "her real self".

 

The danger in my situation is that my STBXWW wants desperately to make our DD14 "just like her".STBXWW has promoted all sorts of dangerous behavior in our DD14.STBXWW has allowed and condoned actions and behaviors which would have ended in disaster for my DD14 if DD14 was a weaker person spiritually and emotionally.STBXWW would make the comment "she's just like me" in regards to all situations.Examples-She cant's get all A's-she is just like me,school is never going to be her thing!Oh you can get anything you like "pierced" You're just like I was at your age!Oh you can dress any way you like -You are just like me at your age.This was after STBXWW did the identical thing to her DD22 at the age of 14,only to see her (DD22 now) throw away own future at that age.

 

The STBXWW is knowlingly hurting other people and has no remorse and no empathy for anyone in her path of destruction.This is fact,not conjecture.Some here want to argue about the facts and twist them into a defense of evil behaviors by a BPDr.To them I say,have at it and be not surprised when you end up disappointing yourself.

 

Addiction definition-Short term behavior with long term destruction.In the short term you may see "improvement" in the BPDr you seek to "help" ,in the end they will seek a new victim and you will be emotionally destroyed.It doesn't matter whether they intentionally destroyed you or if it was accidental.You are still destroyed.

 

I will never again be part of a BPDr's relationship.I recommend anyone who is in a relationship with a known BPDr be very cautious with your optimism and remain guarded in your emotional attachment.Just know that the "relationship" will change you for the worse and you will have many scars before it is over.

 

REVITUP

[M30USA]

I agree. I have reasons to believe that BPD is the result of demonic possession. Non-believers can laugh at this, but we each have our opinion.

Edited January 20, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Emilia]

funny how you bring religion into anything it starts getting seriously freaky

[M30USA]

funny how you bring religion into anything it starts getting seriously freaky

 

"Because it is sometimes so unbelievable, the truth often escapes being known."

-Heraclitus (circa 500 BC)

 

Also, by saying someone is "demon possessed", I'm not damning them as a bad person. They just have an external force acting upon them, which is stronger than themselves. They can be delivered from it. (Sounds just like the concept of a psychopathology.)

[dreamingoftigers]

I agree. I have reasons to believe that BPD is the result of demonic possession. Non-believers can laugh at this, but we each have our opinion.

 

I WAS NOT "possessed." I WAS raised in a virtual prison where I was exposed to inconsistent, abusive behaviours for my first 16 years. If a man were imprisoned for 16 years that was innocent, no one would expect him to regain a sense of wellness right away, if at all.

 

Same with BPD. A decent percentage of us actually improve over time after exposure to real life and less abuse from home.

 

Some, like me, were ABLE to realize that getting hospitalized three times due to relational issues did not add up to normal, so we wanted to know why. I found out why. I even found an alternate therapy and got better. It took awhile. I no longer qualify as BPD.

 

When people like you say things like this, it perpetuates a myth and makes us seem scarier and beyond help.

 

It continues to isolate people who feel toxic levels of shame and isolation as it is. Had I not been obliterated in childhood, I wouldn't have had to go through my own struggle which has taken half of my adult life so far.

 

I am not asking anyone to stay with a BPD sufferer. On the contrary I think people should leave a encourage their former partner to seek PTSD help. Because that's what BPD is, layers of childhood PTSD. Like most chronic pain sufferers, BPD people can't see past their own pain and shame. Yours just isn't "as real" to them and they think you hold all of the cards to their happiness, but you keep shifting the deck around. They can't see their behaviour playing a role in what they are getting dealt.

 

Every time a myth like this comes up about BPD, it sickens me to know how people who suffer with it are characterized by someone who is neither a professional or truly helping them in some way, even if it's just having good boundaries against the disease. Ridiculous. I thought by 2013 we'd come farther regarding mental health perception.

[M30USA]

Dreaming,

 

What is your idea of "possession"? How would you define it and what are its characteristics?

[dreamingoftigers]

Dreaming,

 

What is your idea of "possession"? How would you define it and what are its characteristics?

 

If I get a few moments later on, I will also be going through the thread regarding treatment and research regarding BPD.

 

SG's posts are fallacious, to say the least. Much has been done regarding treatment over the last 15 years. And no, it isn't my deluded fantasy, it is mental health research and fact. Eternal sunshine is correct in referring to DBT/CBT. in conjunction with EMDR MOST BPD people can live a rather normal life.

 

Also, regarding medication. When I was hospitalized they recommended that I DID NOT have medication as anti-depressants etc weren't helpful and in fact may provide enough liftoff to a BPD person to finish off their suicide with "success."

 

Demon Possession:

 

Demonic possession - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

Very unlike my experience with BPD. Or any other BPD I have ever known.

[NoMoreJerks]

@ demonic possession / anti-Christ / religious discussions of BPD....

 

That sh*t sounds as insane as BPDers...... Sorry, but it had to be said. Let's keep on topic and discuss BPD, not religion or some religious interpretations of BPD.

[dreamingoftigers]

@ demonic possession / anti-Christ / religious discussions of BPD....

 

That sh*t sounds as insane as BPDers...... Sorry, but it had to be said. Let's keep on topic and discuss BPD, not religion or some religious interpretations of BPD.

 

LOL, I had the same thought. I was reluctant to engage, but only to disprove. So as not to allow it to spawn 6 more pages of "BPDs must in be league somehow with the Devil.":eek:

 

I was evaluated last year and no longer have most of the traits are BPD traits save for compulsive eating/spending and a fear of abandonment BUT I have breathing exercises that help with that trigger when it comes up. Also "How to Break Your Addiction to a Person" helped me recognize more what caused that physiological reaction so it helps to know now that it is a part of me but that I will survive it and that the pain, no matter how overwhelming, will lessen over time. So instead of trying to manipulate or do other rather sociopathic behaviours, I can just face it and pop out the other side.

 

Plus, the EMDR deadened a lot if my other trauma triggers. It doesn't feel like I am "rising and falling" with the waves and have no control. Some of my life is just "life" and there are ups and downs. Some of it is "me" even still but I can only work on what I am aware of and go day by day.

I don't get "emotionally flooded" like I used to. Honestly I survived the last few years of confusion with my husband because they didn't feel as horrid as going through untreated BPD. So in some ways it's been a blessing.

 

It was worked with early enough that I didn't leave a string of broken exes and families. I can't say other BPD have been so lucky.

 

Life just isn't as scary black and glorious white as it used to be either, but overall, when averaged out I feel much better and healthier. As a BPD the highs (like a new love) weren't worth the lows (loss of love) but as someone a little more balanced, life's highs are worth life's lows.

 

I hope that you can recover from your experiences (if you haven't already, I've only read up to page 6 of the thread).

 

I actually want to offer everyone who has suffered from a BPDr's actions an apology on behalf of them. Their very way of perceiving the world is so skewed that many will not be able to see it. I truly am sorry to everyone hurt by this disorder and hopefully over time there can be more light shed on the subject so that no more people have to suffer at the hands of a BPDr.

[NoMoreJerks]

Of course, my post was not to say that I think BPDers can be cured. No, they simply cannot be. You are not a BPD, most likely. You might have some BPD traits, and hell, just about everyone might do, some more so than others, but there are also a lot of misdiagnoses of BPD (false positives). I have yet to hear of any BPDer getting "rid" of their BPD traits. They don't have the self-awareness to admit that they have a problem, and if they do go into therapy, they go in with the intention of gaining an ally, and getting the therapist to side with them against their partner. And, being unable to shift the therapist onto their "side", they accuse them of being "biased", of conspiring against them, etc. They are always the victims. Always. That is why they cannot see that they can do something wrong, that maybe, just maybe, the problem lies within them. Nope, sorry, they do not. This is the sad truth about BPDers. You are not a BPDer, though you might've had BPD traits alongside PTSD or some other disorder.

 

I don't think you owe anyone an apology for the behaviour of others. I do not want an apology from my NPD/BPD ex (mine was more NPD than BPD to be fair, though he had strong streaks of BPD in there -- the two can often co-exist, and I think men are less likely to be BPDers anyway). I just want my ex to disappear from my life, and I want to forget the entire experience. It would've been easier to do that, had it not been my first relationship EVER (and yes, I might've made mistakes myself , due to inexperience -- but no, that was not the reason I suffered so much in this relationship), and the guy I lost my virginity to. I think he is basking in the satisfaction of knowing that I will never forget him because of that. That hurts.

[William]

From moderation:

 

I had to go back to the starting post to pull up this question:

 

Does anyone know of anything I can do to help me overcome my disorder?

 

Seeking spiritual guidance certainly can be a potential source of treatment. Let's keep the discussion focused on the condition and treatment. If members wish to open a thread in the Religion and Spirituality forum regarding viewpoints on mental illness and personality disorder, I encourage them to do so. Thanks.

[dreamingoftigers]

Of course, my post was not to say that I think BPDers can be cured. No, they simply cannot be. You are not a BPD, most likely. You might have some BPD traits, and hell, just about everyone might do, some more so than others, but there are also a lot of misdiagnoses of BPD (false positives). I have yet to hear of any BPDer getting "rid" of their BPD traits. They don't have the self-awareness to admit that they have a problem, and if they do go into therapy, they go in with the intention of gaining an ally, and getting the therapist to side with them against their partner. And, being unable to shift the therapist onto their "side", they accuse them of being "biased", of conspiring against them, etc. They are always the victims. Always. That is why they cannot see that they can do something wrong, that maybe, just maybe, the problem lies within them. Nope, sorry, they do not. This is the sad truth about BPDers. You are not a BPDer, though you might've had BPD traits alongside PTSD or some other disorder.

 

You may take or leave my apology. It sounds like you have suffered a lot.

 

However in regards to treatment of BPD and whether or not "I am one."

I was one. Yes I certainly was. Classically so in fact. I was also diagnosed on two SEPARATE occasions. One by a forensic psychiatrist who is quite noted and on top of his game. There wasn't much mistaking it, I was the usual suspect with the usual MO.

 

Please refer to the treatment and prognosis section. I reviewed two other sites. But as usual wikipedia tends to bring a lot of info together. Not only that but "sometimes I act crazy" also confirms treatment possibilities. Plus I HAD TREATMENT and no longer test as BPD.

 

There are options and solutions. It was widely believed that there simply weren't and for plenty of BPDs they don't respond to treatment largely because the underlying PTSD triggers cannot be treated through talk-therapy. Wrong part of the brain.

 

So instead of taking your word for it, check out the link. Even try googling Borderline Personality Disorder treatment and effectiveness if you don't want to take my word for it. A decent portion of us do recover and our brains start to make those connections in the frontal lobe with in increased experience etc.

 

If DBT and treatment was completely ineffective, we would just be locked up like we were in the old days.

 

I do not recommend stating with an untreated borderline or trying to go for couples counseling with one. That is disastrous.

[dreamingoftigers]

Borderline personality disorder - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

All that, and I forgot to paste the link, LOL.