Ybur Posted August 18, 2004 Share Posted August 18, 2004 Basically, I fell pregnant with his baby. He started seeing someone else and the person became pregnant with his baby as well. Later I've learnt that she had an abortion. They broke up and he is still in my life . Though, I detest him for making my pregnancy experience a nightmare. For not being there for me. For cheating on me. For rejecting me at a time when I needed him the most. I needed him so much. My first baby, this is a moment that I have lived for for so long and had no idea that it would turn out like this. i felt like I have been stripped down naked and thrown out of my own house, i felt deprived of this beautiful maternal experience. This guy is still around, he is a good father. Our baby is eight months old. He thinks that I forgave him but I cannot. I love him and hate him at the same time. I want to find a way to move on. I cannot be with him, he has dishonored me. The fact that he knows that I know about what happened makes it so much worse cause I am still with him and what self-respecting person would be with someone who has violated them in such a terrible way. I think about the baby. If I leave him, I would not want to be near him and that would mean that he would not be near my baby either. I love him(how sick) and hate him at the same time. How do I close the book on all of this and find a way of standing alone as a single parent and being without this person? How do I forget the terrible pain. How do I get over this. The thought of being without him is terrible, though I will never be able to respect or trust him ever again and what use is a relationship without that? Link to post Share on other sites
honey2005 Posted August 18, 2004 Share Posted August 18, 2004 I'm sorry this happened to you. I think you definitely need to get him out of your life. A guy that would do something like that to you can't have much of a heart IMO. Don't hate your maternal experience, after all, you got a beautiful baby out of it, even if the baby's father is a complete jerk. He doesn't need to be out of your baby's life completely, just out of yours (kinda). You would be free to find someone who will love you and would never think of doing somethign as cruel as what he did. After you leave him and you feel like you need him back in your life (which you don't), just think of the cruel things he did to you, how me made you feel, how he virtually abondoned you in your time of need. You don't need a guy like that, NO ONE needs or deserves a guy like that. I hope things work out for you:(. Link to post Share on other sites
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