Fat bashing....what do you think?

[honey2005]

Just because someone SAYS something negative using their judgment doesn't mean their right. Get it straight! I don't have to change myself just because someone makes a judgment?!?!? That's basically like confirming their judgment isn't it?!?!?

 

I agree with MadamSwirl on this point. The fact that someone else doesn't like the way other people look doesn't mean that they should have to change themselves. If they are happy with the way they look no one else should have any say about it.

 

Dyer, you may not realize this, but it's easy to be thin when your a teen.

 

Sadly that's not really the case. Some young people find it easy to be thin, but not all of them. It look alot of effort on my part to become thin, and now that I'm taking medication it's getting even harder. I don't like the way I look or feel when I'm overweight (I'm 130 right now, which isn't greatly overweight for my height, but it's more than I want to be) so I try my hardest to get thinner.

 

I don't dislike anyone for their own prejudices against overweight people. That's how they feel and it's not any of my business, and it's alright as long as they keep it to themselves. Some people, though, have to make hurtful comments about people's weight. They don't think about the fact that they don't even know this person or their situation. They could be overweight for medical reasons and be trying with everything they have to become thinner and the negative judgments CAN'T become a motivating factor because they are already motivated as they could possibly be. So along with the fact that they dislike how they look and can't lose weight, they have to live with the hurtful comments other people make about them.

[littleflowerpot]

double post

[littleflowerpot]

Originally posted by dyermaker

Can you care to explain how?

 

I think by condemning my honesty, you're asserting your moral superiority. Reminds me of 'Some of my best friends are black'.

 

I never attempted to justify it. I wasn't seeking to defend my prejudices with rational arguments, I was contributing to a tally on who feels this way, and I think more people would have the courage to come forward and admit/recognize their prejudice if there wasn't a group of people waiting to pounce on them.

 

I'm nothing but respectful to the majority of people I come across, and I've never hurt somebody because of their weight. I think a lot more harm is done by self-righteous people such as yourself than prejudiced people, but that's just my opinion.

 

People often confuse 'defending their opinions' with 'attacking the opinions of others'.

 

i'm not self-righteous. no need to attack me for my beliefs. and i never condemned your honesty and i'd challenge you to show me where i did. so how in the hell do you justify calling prejudice with the patronizing claim that "some of my best friends are black"? it makes no sense. you are just shooting blanks trying to hit me because you don't like that i said i was disappointed in your prejudice of fat people. saying i was disappointed in no way says i was condemning you.

 

there are many types of prejudice and racism is one of them. because it's a prevalent prejudice and because you used it as a way to try put me down as a hypocrite, i'll use it to try to explain what i mean. racism is deplorable and unacceptable. is it okay to accept racism? you may not go up to a person of a different color and call them a name to their face but does that mean that your racism doesn't effect them? do you think it is inconceivable that it could directly or indirectly be hurtful to them? and is it okay to voice a negative opinion about racism but not about prejudice against fat people? some people think it's more okay to be accepting of fat prejudice and that's not fair.

 

no one pounced on you, dyer. it is not an attack to express disappointment. calling me self-righteous is offensive to me. i AM defending my opinion and i'm not attacking you. me and my self-righteous self have an obese sister that's tried to off herself because of this last accepted prejudice. i think it's ugly, i don't like it, and i have every right to say it. you can call me self-righteous all you want for thinking this way but you'd be a hypocrite to deny me the right to voice it especially you think it's okay to dislike fat people because they are fat.

[dyermaker]

Originally posted by littleflowerpot

i'm not self-righteous. no need to attack me for my beliefs. and i never condemned your honesty and i'd challenge you to show me where i did.

To say that you're dissapointed means that you held me to an expectiation, and I failed to meet the expectation. That's what dissapointment is. To say that one fails to meet an expectation of righteousness is a condemnation. Let's call a spade a spade. You had no business criticizing my opinion, and now that you have, you can't hide behind this 'I was just expressing my beliefs' nonsense.

 

the title of the thread is about fat "bashing." bashing is entirely different than having a prejudice that you think doesn't hurt anyone.

I read more than the title.

is it okay to accept racism? you may not go up to a person of a different color and call them a name to their face but does that mean that your racism doesn't effect them?

A racist who doesn't hurt anybody doesn't hurt anybody. A racist whose racism in no way affects another human being is only doing a disservice to themselves, and there's nothing destructive about it.

you are right that prejudice has no rational but if you think it doesn't hurt then i just can't agree with that.

Explain how I've hurt a fat person. I dare you. If you can't, please refrain from making baseless statements.

you don't think that fat people reading that you are prejudiced against them wouldn't make them feel a little crappier?

I didn't do it in a hurtful way. I think a fat person knows people are prejudiced against them.

 

A person started a thread asking for honesty, not comfort.

 

even if you think no one would ever know that you were prejudiced against them, i would'nt be too sure of that. people can be a lot more perceptive than you think and it is hurtful.

Explain how I've hurt a fat person. I dare you. If you can't, please refrain from making baseless statements.

 

You are not entitled to assume how well I can behave in society.

 

calling me self-righteous is offensive to me.

Your self-righteousness offends me.

 

i AM defending my opinion and i'm not attacking you.

To defend an opinion means that your opinion was attacked. I never attacked your opinion.

 

me and my self-righteous self have an obese sister that's tried to off herself because of this last accepted prejudice.

I'm sorry to hear that. I had nothing to do with it though, and I won't take responsibility for it.

Once again, Explain how I've hurt a fat person. I dare you. If you can't, please refrain from making baseless statements.

 

You CANNOT assume to know how I behave and treat people, You CANNOT.

 

i think it's ugly, i don't like it, and i have every right to say it.

That's self-righteousness.

 

you can call me self-righteous all you want for thinking this way but you'd be a hypocrite to deny me the right to voice it when you think it's okay to say you dislike fat people because they are fat.

Please don't misquote me, that's lame.

 

I never said I disliked fat people, I said I have a prejudice towards them. It's something I've recognized, to a point where I can function in society without hurting anybody.

 

I also never 'denied you the right' to voice your opinion, I only said that your assertions of superiority detract from an atmosphere of honest discussion, and I still believe that.

[littleflowerpot]

you're right. you didn't say you didn't like fat people and that's why i edited it. i was heated and i reread what i said and make changes where i thought i needed to make changes. too bad my computer is running funky tonight and i didn't catch it fast enough.

 

now, you can stop daring me. it is an aggressive and nasty bit of bait.

 

i'm soooooo sorry i said i was disappointed. the truth is i had read some of your posts before and i thought you were a great guy. so i was disappointed to learn this about you. my opinion is changed so i'm no longer disappointed. that should make you feel much better.

 

based on your post, you think it's okay to be racist or fat prejudiced as long as you are quiet about it. we disagree on that. i think prejudice has a way of rearing it's head. no need to personally dare me again because i think prejudice is insidious and not the harm is not always easily proven. i can't change your mind and you won't change mine about it either.

 

let's call a spade a spade is right. barbie started this thread because she was talking about people with fat prejudice that make hurtful comments.

 

btw, you did attack my opinion. you called me self-righteous for it and equated it with someone making a patronizing statement about black people. i don't think i'm superior to you but i think your prejudice is wrong and i won't be a good little girl and keep my mouth shut.

[dyermaker]

Originally posted by littleflowerpot

now, you can stop daring me. it is an aggressive and nasty bit of bait.

There's no bait at all. I think it's destructive to make baseless claims, especially regarding my character.

You thrice tried to imply I've somehow hurt people because they're fat. Anyone who knows me knows that I'm not hurtful, so your statements are baseless. I *dare* you to provide an example of how my prejudice manifests itself as hurtfulness. You can't, so you shouldn't be saying things you can't back up.

the truth is i had read some of your posts before and i thought you were a great guy. so i was disappointed to learn this about you. my opinion is changed so i'm no longer disappointed. that should make you feel much better.

It should certainly make people think twice before they're honest again.

based on your post, you think it's okay to be racist or fat prejudiced as long as you are quiet about it. we disagree on that.

You're not going to be able to misquote me and get away with it. I never condoned racism nor prejudice. I said there's nothing hurtful about a racist with manners, I liken it to a pedophile who controls himself.

i think prejudice has a way of rearing it's head.

You're speaking now about prejudice in general, before you were speaking about ME. Your statement that somehow it 'rears its head' in MY life or how I interact with people is false.

btw, you did attack my opinion. you called me self-righteous for it

I still think you're being self-righteous about it. I think you'll have a difficult time convincing anyone you're the victim of an attack, you're the one who quoted my post to begin with.

[littleflowerpot]

i'm not a victim and certainly not to you so don't worry, i'm not trying to get anyone to see me as a victim here.

 

i was disappointed that a person i thought was a nice person had a prejudice that i STILL believe is a bad thing. i shouldn't have voiced that. and i no longer care if you think me self-righteous. to me it's better to be thought of as self-righteous than if i were prejudiced and okay with it. i think your prejudice is wrong. i have a personal stake in this particular prejudice and perhaps it makes me more opinionated about it but i'm okay with that.

 

but again, if you came on here and said "i'm a racist," (and i know you didn't) would you not think anyone at all would find something wrong with that and say it? maybe you are correct that people should be allowed to say "i'm prejudiced" and we should just accept it and say okay this guy is prejudiced. i'll have to think about it and decide if i should do that in the future or not.

[havNfun]

LittleFlower,

are you fat too?

[Matilda]

Dyer,

 

I must agree with littleflowerpot that you are being extremely naive to think that having a prejudice, whether it is expressed or not, is not harmful to others. (I also think it is harmful to yourself, but that's another story.)

 

I do agree with you that we all have prejudices, whether we admit them or not. I also think it is wise to be aware of our own prejudices, so we can try to actively avoid prejudging others, even though that is our bias.

 

Do you think it's fair for others to prejudge you on the basis of one of your own physical characteristics?

[Mr Spock]

Dyer,

 

I must agree with littleflowerpot that you are being extremely naive to think that having a prejudice, whether it is expressed or not, is not harmful to others. (I also think it is harmful to yourself, but that's another story.)

 

I disagree. Everyone has ingrained prejudices that they carry within them. It's how we act around those prejudices that displays our personal character. If ANYONE says that they have no prejudices towards a race, religion or creed they are full of sh*t. Or perhaps the Dali Lama. So in reality, we're all naive and harmful because we think the fact we like a certain group of people (uber fatties, really skinny people, blacks, whites, natives, asians, the french) less than our own isn't harmful.

 

 

 

i was disappointed that a person i thought was a nice person had a prejudice that i STILL believe is a bad thing. i shouldn't have voiced that. and i no longer care if you think me self-righteous. to me it's better to be thought of as self-righteous than if i were prejudiced and okay with it. i think your prejudice is wrong. i have a personal stake in this particular prejudice and perhaps it makes me more opinionated about it but i'm okay with that.

 

If you're dissapointed that someone you barely know in an internet board has real opinions and a different outlook on the world than you thought how do you ever make it in the real world?

 

now, you can stop daring me. it is an aggressive and nasty bit of bait.

 

I seem to remember you doing the same, (to me)a fewpages back, before the silent janitors swept it under the rug.

 

 

me and my self-righteous self have an obese sister that's tried to off herself because of this last accepted prejudice. i think it's ugly, i don't like it, and i have every right to say it. you can call me self-righteous all you want for thinking this way but you'd be a hypocrite to deny me the right to voice it especially you think it's okay to dislike fat people because they are fat.

 

 

I'm sorry to hear your sister tried to take her own life because of her obesity. That's terrible.

 

I myself like the person, dislike the fat. I TRY to hang out with really fat people. It makes me feel like Kate Moss.

[littleflowerpot]

Originally posted by havNfun

LittleFlower,

are you fat too?

 

do i look fat in my picture?

[littleflowerpot]

Originally posted by Mr Spock

If you're dissapointed that someone you barely know in an internet board has real opinions and a different outlook on the world than you thought how do you ever make it in the real world?

 

I seem to remember you doing the same, (to me)a fewpages back, before the silent janitors swept it under the rug.

 

I'm sorry to hear your sister tried to take her own life because of her obesity. That's terrible.

 

I myself like the person, dislike the fat. I TRY to hang out with really fat people. It makes me feel like Kate Moss.

 

i make it in the real world because disappointment doesn't kill or cripple me. duh.

 

what silent janitors? no one made me shut up. is that how you perceived it? i quite speaking to you because i realized there was no point to it. and i NEVER dared you (much less did it over and over again like dyer did - get your claims straight.) this discussion is not about me and you spock.

 

so you hang out with fat people to make you feel better about yourself? nice.

[Taken_Angel]

I myself like the person, dislike the fat. I TRY to hang out with really fat people. It makes me feel like Kate Moss.

 

 

This doesn't dignify a response!

[tiki]

Originally posted by Mr Spock I myself like the person, dislike the fat. I TRY to hang out with really fat people. It makes me feel like Kate Moss.

 

WOW.

 

Glad to see that you get your rocks off on hanging out with fat people so *you* look better. Maybe you could work on self esteem issues? - without dragging other victims into your games!

 

Mr Spock, wanna come hang with me so I seem like an angel compared to your nasty attitude? so that I feel better (in general) about myself. Brilliant idea. Please come hang with me Mr Spock, I want to make people realize how awesome I am! I can't do it on my own...I need to leech off of your weakness! Hit me up yo! Gosh people truly AMAZE me.

 

So for the count, we've got a couple people that outright state they discriminate against fat people, hang out with fat people to gain confidence in themselves, and are pro "fat tax". YAY! If mean, crude, offensive people were taxed like those stated above, we'd make a significant wedge in the national deficit!!!

[littleflowerpot]

LOL - while i cleaning out my inbox i just remembered that havnfun knows i'm a part-time model so it's funny he asked me if i'm fat JUST because i defend my belief that it's wrong to be prejudiced against fat people.

[Matilda]

I must say I'm a bit shocked that there is so much fat bashing. I guess I'm extremely naive too.

 

I really don't understand why there is a such a fat vs. thin issue.

 

I disagree. Everyone has ingrained prejudices that they carry within them. It's how we act around those prejudices that displays our personal character. If ANYONE says that they have no prejudices towards a race, religion or creed they are full of sh*t. Or perhaps the Dali Lama. So in reality, we're all naive and harmful because we think the fact we like a certain group of people (uber fatties, really skinny people, blacks, whites, natives, asians, the french) less than our own isn't harmful

 

Spock, I also said in my post that everyone has prejudices, and yes I do think they're still harmful even though everyone has them.

[sinner]

This thread won't die, so let me try to kill it.

 

I concede it's wrong to be prejudiced against, mock, humiliate, abuse or ridicule anyone on account of a physical or mental characteristic. Most would concede that.

 

Substituting morbidly obese for fat, I can say that, all things being equal, I prefer to interact in person , whether as a friend, lover, colleague, with people who are not morbidly obese.

 

To me, it's not a question of believing that certain personality characteristics necessarily flow from obesity. They don't. It's all about the look.

 

I do not like to look or be around morbidly obese people. I especially would not want one as a lover. I have an aesthetic aversion for fat people. I suspect many share my mild aesthetic aversion to the morbidly obese.

 

And since I don't behave in accordance with my aversion, I don't believe there are any ethical issues. Many of us avoid folks whom we find unattractive.

 

It's relatively easy to stop the bashing, the much harder part is for fat people to be aesthetically liked by the majority. I don't see that happening anytime soon.

[SARose61]

I think most people that are fat bashers are just trying to cover up their own fears of being or becoming fat themselves. It is very sad.

 

I use to be extremely obese close to 400lbs. I had a gastric bypass over 2 years ago. Never really got thin, but I am just a bit chubby now. I no longer get the stares, the smirks, the jokes that I use to get. What is disturbing is that I now get more eye contact, more smiles and more courteous behavior from people and I have to ask myself why? What was worse the bashing or the feeling that I would get from some folks like they wished I was just not there, the quick looks and then looking away.

 

Every time I see a really heavy person now, my heart aches for them. I know some folks that are heavy and very much into the NAFFA movement. In my 20s, I was very much in the BBW attitude zone. Yeah, I'm fat and beautiful and if ya dont like it, kiss my grits. As I got older and health problems started and I no longer felt I had a tough exterior to buffer the abuse, I had to do something for myself and I am glad that I did. However the change opened up my eyes to just how differently I was being treated before.

 

Rose

[Taken_Angel]

Who cares if the thread won't die Sinner? You didn't start it so why try and end it? If you don't like it don't reply to it!

 

And just for the record for anyone who asks..no I'm not fat my highest weight ever was between 115-120lbs and I am about 5'3 (not that it matters but I see the history of people asking "are you fat too")

 

 

SARose61........I am soooooooooo happy for you that you were able to have WLS and that it worked for you. I know this is a procedure that helps people who are UNABLE to get a hold on their weight be able to finally begin and maintain weight loss. It isn't for everyone and it's good that just because of closed minded losers (we won't mention names) you didn't do it, it wasn't a vanity issue for you but a need for health reasons.

 

I realize not ALL obese people will develop co-morbities but for those who do or who run the risk to develop health problems it is a good solution.

 

You mentioned being in the "bbw" attitude, well you know not all "bbws" only develop this out of "protection" some truthfully know that they are beautiful people. Maybe not by "society's" standards but by truthfully being a beautiful person INSIDE and OUT!

 

Anyway I'm curious what was your ending weight? You don't have to express it here you can PM me if you'd like. The reason I ask if a cousin of mine is similar she is actually about at your starting weight and has been so for over 6 years and is about to have WLS I'm just curious about where she could expect to end up.

[tiki]

Originally posted by sinner

This thread won't die, so let me try to kill it.

 

I concede it's wrong to be prejudiced against, mock, humiliate, abuse or ridicule anyone on account of a physical or mental characteristic. Most would concede that.

 

Substituting morbidly obese for fat, I can say that, all things being equal, I prefer to interact in person , whether as a friend, lover, colleague, with people who are not morbidly obese.

 

To me, it's not a question of believing that certain personality characteristics necessarily flow from obesity. They don't. It's all about the look.

 

I do not like to look or be around morbidly obese people. I especially would not want one as a lover. I have an aesthetic aversion for fat people. I suspect many share my mild aesthetic aversion to the morbidly obese.

 

And since I don't behave in accordance with my aversion, I don't believe there are any ethical issues. Many of us avoid folks whom we find unattractive.

 

It's relatively easy to stop the bashing, the much harder part is for fat people to be aesthetically liked by the majority. I don't see that happening anytime soon.

 

Thank you sinner for posting your opinion in a CIVIL fashion!

 

The statement that you made did not seem hurtful, rude or even intended as an attack. Maybe it's in the way some of these "bashers" word their statements?

[sinner]

You're welcome, Tiki. This has been a tough, very painful, anguished thread. It almost makes me long for the lamentable "Is my penis big enough?" thread. Comic relief is most definitely needed.

 

In its way, though, the thread has sensitized me to issues of weight, respect, tolerance and decency. That's not a bad thing.

[littleflowerpot]

Originally posted by sinner

This thread won't die, so let me try to kill it.

 

I concede it's wrong to be prejudiced against, mock, humiliate, abuse or ridicule anyone on account of a physical or mental characteristic. Most would concede that.

 

Substituting morbidly obese for fat, I can say that, all things being equal, I prefer to interact in person , whether as a friend, lover, colleague, with people who are not morbidly obese.

 

To me, it's not a question of believing that certain personality characteristics necessarily flow from obesity. They don't. It's all about the look.

 

I do not like to look or be around morbidly obese people. I especially would not want one as a lover. I have an aesthetic aversion for fat people. I suspect many share my mild aesthetic aversion to the morbidly obese.

 

And since I don't behave in accordance with my aversion, I don't believe there are any ethical issues. Many of us avoid folks whom we find unattractive.

 

It's relatively easy to stop the bashing, the much harder part is for fat people to be aesthetically liked by the majority. I don't see that happening anytime soon.

 

to each his own but i believe the thread was meant in reference to people that think it's okay to make rude and ugly comments to and about fat people. does it really matter if shallow people don't like fat people? it shouldn't but i think it does because it causes fat people to feel even more shame, humiliation and have hurt feelings because people dislike them based on their physical characteristics. so why should the thread die? should no one ever stand up and try to defend people they care about? (in my case, my sister)

[littleflowerpot]

Originally posted by SARose61

I use to be extremely obese close to 400lbs. I had a gastric bypass over 2 years ago. Never really got thin, but I am just a bit chubby now. I no longer get the stares, the smirks, the jokes that I use to get. What is disturbing is that I now get more eye contact, more smiles and more courteous behavior from people and I have to ask myself why? What was worse the bashing or the feeling that I would get from some folks like they wished I was just not there, the quick looks and then looking away.

 

my sister has expressed the same thing. even when people aren't being outright derisive, she can intuit fat prejudice just from the behavior, looks she gets and attitudes and it bothers her. that bothers me. unfortunately, there are a lot of people that are otherwise very nice people that don't feel comfortable addressing their own prejudice and are unwilling to try to change it because it makes them uncomfortable. no one likes to think they are hurtful even if it's indirectly.

[littleflowerpot]

Originally posted by sinner

You're welcome, Tiki. This has been a tough, very painful, anguished thread. It almost makes me long for the lamentable "Is my penis big enough?" thread. Comic relief is most definitely needed.

 

In its way, though, the thread has sensitized me to issues of weight, respect, tolerance and decency. That's not a bad thing.

 

communication is a good thing.

[HokeyReligions]

Many people assume that fat people deserve their discomfort. They don't carry signs that explain their slow metabolism, defective thyroids or genetic history. They must endure in silence in a world where obesity is equated with gluttony and laziness.

 

Excess weight is a chronic condition, and maintaining a healthy weight is more complex than simply willing oneself to eat less food. Some people are obese throughout their entire lives. People who are morbidly obese cannot take a break from their condition. The effects of obesity are with them every hour of every day.

 

Two people who follow the same diet and exercise program will not necessarily weigh the same or wear the same size clothing. There are many more factors to weight loss/maintenance than simply eating less and exercising more. Uneducated or prejudiced people refuse to acknowledge this.

 

http://www.about-obesity.com/

 

Psychological and Social Factors That Affect Self Esteem

 

Parents of teenagers know that their kids are often subject to wild fluctuations of self esteem. At times, they seem invulnerable: they're able to dive off high cliffs, take leaps on their skateboards and strut with utter confidence. At other times, the only thing taking a dive is their self esteem. They are depressed and feel too fat, too thin, too ugly, or too embarrassed to face the world.

 

While such swings are normal, the extremes are also quite rare. Overweight teens, however, are almost always self-conscious about their appearance, their ability to participate in athletic events and their popularity. And sadly, more and more young children are facing the prospect of life on the sidelines.

 

Teenage obesity isn't the only culprit, though. Obese adults also suffer from self esteem issues.

 

--------------------------------------------

 

Obese people feel unwelcome in public. They know that their bodies will overflow the standard size seats on airplanes, in movie theaters, in public auditoriums, and at the opera. The narrow seats of school bleachers, church pews and park benches are uncomfortable and crowded places.

 

Children, teens and adults who are overweight often feel isolated and lonely. Some are outgoing, compensating for what they perceive to be a lack of physical appeal. They are often willing to give more time and attention to others than they get back for themselves.

 

Some obese young people report that they enjoy corresponding with internet pen pals and joining chat rooms where they participate as "normal" people. The anonymity of the Internet protects them from their peers' judgments. Unfortunately, the time spent online takes them away from emotionally nourishing, real-world relationships.

 

---------------------------------------------------

 

Most employers tend to be quite secretive about the criteria they use for selecting the employees that they hire, fearing lawsuits from the candidates they reject. However, under the cover of anonymity, many admit that employment discrimination against the obese does occur.

 

Why are obese people subject to employment discrimination? People often assume that obese people are lazy, sluggish and even grumpy. An overweight secretary isn't likely to leap out of her seat to offer coffee to visitors. Some obese people can't walk very far or very fast; many companies want the public to perceive them as young, dynamic and energetic.

 

------------------------------------------------

 

Obese people often develop low self-esteem in no time at all. They’re embarrassed to be seen in public and they’re often ashamed of how they look. Other people's first impressions are most often negative, and obese people are acutely aware of this.

 

Gwyneth Paltrow donned a "fat suit" for her role as a part-time obese person in the movie Shallow Hal. One day, she walked out in public to see how she would fare as an obese woman.

 

"Nobody would make eye contact with me at all," she said. "Everybody was very dismissive. I got a real sense of what it's like to be a heavy person in this country and how people are so insensitive and degrading."

 

Paltrow went on to say that the experience taught her what it was like to be heavy. Except, of course, that obese people can't unzip the fat and step out of it.

 

--------------------------

 

If you're obese you can shop in special stores for your clothing, if you can afford it. Just don't expect the clothes to be too trendy. Covering up folds of fat requires tent-like designs that drape rather than shape.

 

If you're obese and you're a person of modest means, you can shop for clothing at the large person's section of a discount department store. Obese children can wear adult sizes. Being seen among the racks of voluminous garments, hoping you can find something large enough to fit comfortably can be an embarrassing experience one never gets used to.

 

Imagine being so morbidly obese that even those extra-large sizes don't fit. But you probably don't get to go out much anyway so a few custom outfits should be enough.

 

Shopping for shoes is extra challenging if you're obese. Fat feet are wide, not long. Again, finding the rare footwear that fits is both demeaning and difficult.

 

Many personal items that the non-obese take for granted pose problems for people who are morbidly obese: belts, suspenders, rings, necklaces, slippers, beachwear, underclothes and coats.

 

Tight clothing and apparel can bind, ride up, chafe and cause rashes or blisters. Cool, loose clothing in hot weather is rarely an option for the obese.

 

Side Effects

 

Having limited clothing choices is not just a vanity issue for the obese, particularly the morbidly obese. First impressions count. Try looking confident, professional and energetic for a new job interview when you're more than 100 pounds overweight.

 

You may be compassionate and empathetic, but if you own a business or lead a sales team, you probably won't want an obese person to represent your firm. No matter how open your own thinking may be, you know your clients may react poorly to an obese customer service representative.