Should I make a pass

[Trying too hard?]

I am a single guy that enjoys an active professional and social life. I like to spend my free time with friends and date occasionaly. I am a little shy at times, but for the most part I don't have any problems starting up a conversation and getting to know new people in a social setting.

 

Here is what I want to talk about - there is a girl that works at a store in town that I think is so very attractive. At this point it is purly a physical attraction on my end. I don't see her anywhere else but at the store and I don't go there often. But when I do, I've always got my eye out for her. It is a very busy store and is hard to make eye contact or small talk. I would love to see her in a social setting so that I could have the chance to talk to her and, if lucky enough, get to know her better. I don't know anything about her. She does not wear a tradional wedding ring, so I don't think she is married. I am not afraid of being rejected or turned down by her (Lord knows that has happened enough).

 

Do you guys or girls think it is appropriate to pursue someone based on physical attraction alone? Especially in this case where, if I am going to meet her, I'll have to get real creative. Or, should I just stick to settings where I don't have to force the situation.

 

Comment or suggestions please.

 

Thanks in advance.

[Tony T]

YOU ASK: "Do you guys or girls think it is appropriate to pursue someone based on physical attraction alone?"

 

HELL, YES!!! Why do you think God made attractive people...to attract. I mean, that is just so basic. When you don't know anything in the world about someone and have never, ever talked to them, that's basically all you have to go by.

 

Now, once you've met her and had the opportunity to get to know her a little, you can be a better judge if you want to carry things further. I like your style of putting the energy into meeting someone you're excited about when the first meeting in itself may be quite a challenge.

 

You will have to be rather creative here. Either meet her by buying something in the store and taking it to her...or you can just sort of bump into her at the end of the day when the store is closed and she is on her way to her car. Just make it a very casual scene so she is not threatened.

 

You might also bump into her when she leaves for a lunch break, and if she's alone maybe just be going to the same place she's going.

 

Now, the way I would do it (I was always the champion of this), I would either write her a short note or just wait in the store until she was free and let her know I was an amateur photographer working on building my portfolio and would love to make some photographs of her in a park or anywhere it would be convenient for her. Parade Magazine has an annual photography contest and you want to enter some pictures with her in that contest. This will flatter her beyond belief. There's a 95 percent chance she will say yes. This is non threatening, since you are not asking her out on a date. If you do get to take her pictures, the time you spend with her gives you a very relaxing opportunity to get to know her better, it gives her time to see how nice you are, and ladies LOVE to feel so special that someone would want to take their picture.

 

Then when you take copies of the pictures to her, maybe meet her for lunch, you'll have time to talk to her more. But don't ask her out then. By that time, you would have her phone number. Then wait about five or six days, call her, let her know the great comments you've had on her pictures...and then ask her to attend some event, such as a concert, play or something like that...rather than just going to dinner and a movie. After that, you're in!!!

 

A few times in the past, I have suggested this picture thing and got a lot of criticism for it as being kind of fake or an artificial ploy. But it has worked extremely well for me in the past and all's fair in love...mostly all.

 

Normally I wouldn't suggest such dramatic means for meeting someone but you sound like you've got the spunk and you know what you want. With your attitude, you can meet any lady you want in the world.

 

I like your style.

[Trying too hard?]

Tony, you have just unleashed a monster!

 

My only reservation is that she might think I am some kind of weirdo stalker or something. I really don't have anything to loose though. If a happen-chance meeting hasn't taken place yet, it probably won't. It's time to act, I'm going for it!

 

Thanks

[Tony T]

Well, good for you. And don't give up until you've got her!!!

[Deejette]

She should be flattered that you sought her out and were attracted to her. I am sure you will be a gentleman when you ask her out and she will be captivated by you. Especially if you show sincere interest in her conversation and don't just focus on yourself. Sometimes guys come on too strong with trying to impress a girt they are attracted to and they talk too much about themselves, as if they were trying to impress a new employer.

Well, good for you. And don't give up until you've got her!!!