I'm in love with my ex and we are talking again but now he's married

[onehotmamafromMI]

I have recently been reunited with my ex fiance who is now married . We talk every day and see each other about every 3 days. we do not have a sexual relationship but we have kissed. I'm still in love with him even after 2 years of not seeing each other and he says he feels the same for me .

 

The problem is that about 5 months ago he filed for divorce then his wife ended up having a miscarriage even though they never knew she was pregnant. He stayed with her for a while to help her get through it but one night, under the influence, they slept together and she is now almost 3 months along . I know for a fact they are not happy because his sister is my BF and he tells me all the time. I still love him and his son (we were together for almost 3 years) and his entire family but I don't know whether to see if he is really going to leave his wife after the baby or if I even want to wait. I have no interest in seeing anyone else and no desire to look. This is the man I want to be with but at the same time I'm not really sure he wants to be with me right now. He says he does but I don't see any action being taken on his part. I wish I could just move on but I can't I have no real interest. So my question is how do I make him want me and only me or how do I tell him to decide now cause I don't know if I can do this any longer. Plus it is hard to keep this from my BF. Any ideas. Please help!!

[honey2005]

He says he does but I don't see any action being taken on his part.

 

Well he's married and his wife is pregnant right now, what do you expect him to do, leave her while she's carrying his child?

 

Why is he your ex fiance? What happened between the two of you before? If it was because of problems, don't forget that they will be there if you two do get back together.

[onehotmamafromMI]

We split up because I panicked a few months before the wedding. I thought that I was way to young a little too late. Just as I was writing out the deposit check for the the hall, I realized that this was really going to happen and I just freaked. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. boy do I regret it now.

By the way he married his wife 2 months later out of spite because we never got along.

[onehotmamafromMI]

I mean that his new wife and I never got along. and to this day when she see's anyone from my family she simply ignors them

[SoleMate]

one night, under the influence, they slept together and she is now almost 3 months along

Ah ha, she tricked him into bed and forced him to have sex with her!

 

I'm not really sure he wants to be with me right now. He says he does but I don't see any action being taken on his part.

Well...actions speak louder than words. But people posting on Loveshack do not often realize that.

 

how do I make him want me?

You can't and you shouldn't. You had your chance with him and blew it. Now he belongs to/with someone else. And BTW, I happen to know he's full of baloney whenever he says that he doesn't love his wife or have sex with her. He'd have to be a major psycho if he truly "married your arch enemy purely out of spite", as you believe.

 

how do I tell him to decide now cause I don't know if I can do this any longer?

You can say just that. I guarantee you'll get lots of words and NO MEANINGFUL ACTION. If I'm wrong, send me the paperwork and I'll write you a $100 check.

 

I wish I could just move on but I can't; I have no real interest.

Moving on is a decision and an action, not a feeling.

 

Plus it is hard to keep this from my BF.

Yeah, that must be tough. "OOOhhh, baby, you're the best. Excuse me while I moon over one of my previous rejects."

[onehotmamafromMI]

Thanks all but I guess I forgot to mention that I'm now well over it. His marriage is falling a part and he just wanted to lean on me for support because he knew I would let him fall on me. He sure was right. But once I realized that , that was the reason I sent him back on his way to a horrible and very messed up life. Good thing I never messed around with him. My life is going great and I don't need him or his situation bringing me down. It is like my brain went on vacation and finally came back, good thing!!

[Naive]

Well good for you!!! You saved yourself a lot of heartaches and lies.

[SoleMate]

Welcome back, mama's brain!

 

Don't ever leave like that again.