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California Divorce/affair Legalities !!!


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KnottedTummy

Does anyone know of the legal repercussions that affairs have on divorces?

 

i.e: if a MM files for divorce and the W finds out he has had an affair, what, if any, legal advantages can she have over him? ( in California)

 

Thanks for ANY input....

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overseas2004

California is a no fault state and hence you have no advantages over him for the affair. Your marital property will be split in half and you will go your seperate ways.

 

Sorry if that dissapoints you. I always thought California sucked for enacting such laws.

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I know other states are very strict...NC, MD, SC....but look like you are ok in CA from the previous post. Are you the OW?

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KnottedTummy
Originally posted by beth5201

Are you the OW?

 

yes, i am, for now.... but, i am concerned at the repurcussions my MM may face if the W were to ever find out about us, since divorce for them is in the process...

 

so, if she can have a legal advantage over him i may not be the OW for long...

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if this is a new relationship.....I strongly suggest to wait until the div is final. I did not and it is too much for me to handle. He is going thru all the court crap now and it is soo hard on him and we are not even talking at this point. It sux. Be careful. If she catches wind of you, not only could you be called to court, he could lose a lot if kids are involved. However, that is just in my state.

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KnottedTummy

Unfortunately, this is not a new relationship, we've come back to the drawing board more times than I can count, thus I am in pretty deep...

 

Fortunatley, they have no kids together, which would be a whole different ball game if that were the case...

 

But, I am a little relieved to hear that California is a "no fault" state, which my understanding is, regardless of divorce reasonings everything is split 50/50... is that correct????

 

Beth, when you say "called to court" are you speaking from experience? please explain... I'm dying to hear...

 

Does anyone know the laws of alimony???

 

Thanks for everyones feedback, I'm about to stab my eyes out, I'm pretty naive when it comes to the whole legal/court/attorney/papers/filing/seperation/6 month wait/alimony/divorce issue....

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Well, yes I am speaking from experience(partly). It is a plus you do not have kids involved and I was too naive about the court process. I heard"I have to wait til I gt the letter in the mail for court, court was delayed, I have no choice but to just wait, I am doing all I can, blah blah blah". I was with him for 2 yrs and 3 months. During this time he was legally sep and working on the divorce. The state I am referring to is also a 50-50 state(but not when adultery is involved). We were advised when my MM's wife got a PI that we need to lay low until the court proceedings are over and he is divorced. In his state, it is actaully considered adultery EVEN when he is sep. Which at first I thought was a lie......Let me tell you the internet is a GREAT source for law...I went to divorcesource.com and got a lot of answers and found out it REALLY is a slow process when the 2 parties fight over little things...as far as being called into court.....it is a long story,. however, from phone reecords and credit card bills they found out about me....the reason we do not even talk now! I have not talked to him in 3 weeks and it sucks!!!! Not sure if they can do this where you are, but I could have been called to court if she got pics or evidence, but it is truly very hard to prove adultery. Lucky for me. It has been nothing but heartache. I love him very much, but I want this to be final(divorce). I have been waiting 2 yrs and he says it could be another. They really are not in agreement and may have to go to mediation. It really does depend on the state. Read up! and good luck.

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