loxagos_snake Posted January 9, 2013 Share Posted January 9, 2013 Hello! I'll try to take this from the beginning with as less details as possible. Excuse me if it gets long though, I really enjoy sharing stories! I'm studying Physics in University and am currently in my third year. When I entered the school, I was in a relationship with a girl, so I didn't really look for girls as I was happy. But from the first days, I noticed a very warm, sweet face in the crowd: a beautiful girl that when we first crossed our eyes, something inside me told me we would have a story someday. I call this instinct! Of course, I'm loyal in my relationships so I didn't pursue anything. A year ago, I broke up with my ex-girlfriend. Last school year was a nightmare because of my bad psychology, so I just couldn't look for romance. But this year, I thought I should be more outgoing and actually meet girls from my school. When I saw that girl again, my heart skipped a beat and I was determined to talk to her. Note that all this time we had become Facebook friends. We do exchange likes often (we both listen to some unknown bands) and we got into a small chat before this school year. Actually, she wished me 'Happy birthday fellow scientist!'. I decided to return the favor and 9 days after my birthday it was hers, so I sent her an inbox message wishing her happy birthday and asking her how come we haven't met. She joked about it, replying that 'with the increasing difficulty of this school, don't worry, we'll have plenty of chances to talk!'. At first, as a pessimist, I took this as a gentle rejection. Now that this year began, I completely chickened out. I even avoided her from a distance because yeah, I'm very shy sometimes. My best friend told me that after this chat, I should definately talk to her but one time she passed right in front of me and I didn't even say hi! At some other occasion, I visited another lecture hall in a break to greet some friends. She was sitting above them with her group. When I left, one of my friends told me that he heard her saying 'that's the one I was telling you about' when I approached them, but he is not sure. Anyway, I've been thinking a lot about her lately. I think she is a perfect match for me because she is quiet yet looks fun, and I get a strong feeling, that somehow -in a way even Physics can't explain- I have to be with that girl. It's like intuitively I feel a connection to her...I know, I suck for avoiding her, but you get me, it's not out of disliking her, I'm far too nervous to even talk to her! Actually, what can I say? I thought about music, but I'm not the person who knows every song of a band and she is very educated, so she might pass me for a show-off who just tries to hit on her. And unfortunately, I feel like I lost my chance with her. What do you think? What can you suggest? Should I go for it? If yes, how can I decrease my stress levels? Link to post Share on other sites
kyle77 Posted January 9, 2013 Share Posted January 9, 2013 Just next time you see her say hey hows it going. Think of a pool, the best way to get in is to jump all the way in, not dangle your toes in the water and realize its freezing. The same goes with girls jump right in and start a conversation, the worst that could happen is you find out she just sees you as a friend which it looks like is not the case. Even then that is better than not knowing what could've been. Link to post Share on other sites
sid3 Posted January 10, 2013 Share Posted January 10, 2013 Go for it. Statistically speaking what do you consider your odds? Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted January 10, 2013 Share Posted January 10, 2013 Hello! I'll try to take this from the beginning with as less details as possible. Excuse me if it gets long though, I really enjoy sharing stories! I'm studying Physics in University and am currently in my third year. When I entered the school, I was in a relationship with a girl, so I didn't really look for girls as I was happy. But from the first days, I noticed a very warm, sweet face in the crowd: a beautiful girl that when we first crossed our eyes, something inside me told me we would have a story someday. I call this instinct! Of course, I'm loyal in my relationships so I didn't pursue anything. A year ago, I broke up with my ex-girlfriend. Last school year was a nightmare because of my bad psychology, so I just couldn't look for romance. But this year, I thought I should be more outgoing and actually meet girls from my school. When I saw that girl again, my heart skipped a beat and I was determined to talk to her. Note that all this time we had become Facebook friends. We do exchange likes often (we both listen to some unknown bands) and we got into a small chat before this school year. Actually, she wished me 'Happy birthday fellow scientist!'. I decided to return the favor and 9 days after my birthday it was hers, so I sent her an inbox message wishing her happy birthday and asking her how come we haven't met. She joked about it, replying that 'with the increasing difficulty of this school, don't worry, we'll have plenty of chances to talk!'. At first, as a pessimist, I took this as a gentle rejection. Now that this year began, I completely chickened out. I even avoided her from a distance because yeah, I'm very shy sometimes. My best friend told me that after this chat, I should definately talk to her but one time she passed right in front of me and I didn't even say hi! At some other occasion, I visited another lecture hall in a break to greet some friends. She was sitting above them with her group. When I left, one of my friends told me that he heard her saying 'that's the one I was telling you about' when I approached them, but he is not sure. Anyway, I've been thinking a lot about her lately. I think she is a perfect match for me because she is quiet yet looks fun, and I get a strong feeling, that somehow -in a way even Physics can't explain- I have to be with that girl. It's like intuitively I feel a connection to her...I know, I suck for avoiding her, but you get me, it's not out of disliking her, I'm far too nervous to even talk to her! Actually, what can I say? I thought about music, but I'm not the person who knows every song of a band and she is very educated, so she might pass me for a show-off who just tries to hit on her. And unfortunately, I feel like I lost my chance with her. What do you think? What can you suggest? Should I go for it? If yes, how can I decrease my stress levels? Yes you should, and having a common interest such as music is not showing off it is exploring.knowledge is meant to be shared, it is why we learn, youalso have science as a common ground.....play on that common groun duse it is an icebreaker if you have too...music to me is a common ice breaker its a subject that is never boring.....its universal from chamber pieces to thrash metal there is not one person who doesnt like music..if there is a person out there i havent met them yet.......god set it up this way........its a generation bridge builder for a reason it reaches out and its meant to ...so use it...go for it.....i can sense a success story coming up and i want an invite to the wedding please......to the hopeless romantic fruit from loveshack you can adress it that way.......im kidding....but update on the eventual date would be appreciated.......best wishes and loads of hope in success...decrease you stress levels by thinking....if i ddint make a move i would feel a whole load of regret so i prefer the nerves to regret......hugs.....oooh i have a vicarious sense of instinct about this so go boy go...do it.....:bunny::bunny::bunny: hop to it now...deb Link to post Share on other sites
Author loxagos_snake Posted January 12, 2013 Author Share Posted January 12, 2013 Thank you all for your quick replies. I know this is far easier than I make it seem, but for some reason I'm beating myself up because I believe I'm too late. I acknowledge that music is a common interest, but she is the kind of girl that goes to concerts, doesn't miss a single release of her favorite band, knows their fun facts etc., while I only listen to them casually - we just happen to share an interest in a couple of less popular bands. In a potential question about facts that I wouldn't be able to answer, she could easily think that I'm not an actual fan, but using the bands as an excuse to talk to her! I also have a good feeling about it, I'm just not sure I don't know if I should count the Facebook likes as a positive. Also, maybe the one they were talking about when my friend heard them wasn't me. My worst obstacle is that I'm a bit intimidated by girls my age. Because up to now all my girlfriends have been younger than me and I have never tried anything with an older girl, I sometimes feel like I'm not that mature for them. I see so many varying interests (for example, most girls like acting serious and like 30-year-old women, while I still play videogames occasionally and one of my favorite activities is paintball!) that I'm afraid I can't keep a normal conversation with a girl my age, and that she will pass me for a childish person... Link to post Share on other sites
tomhomme13 Posted January 12, 2013 Share Posted January 12, 2013 You're studying physics which means you must be pretty smart. Stop over thinking it and just go ask her out. Grow a pair! If she turns you down, so what? Is the Universe going to collapse? Of course not. Just do it! Link to post Share on other sites
WordvAction Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 First off, her response to that was not a bad one. Next, your chances of getting her if you don't talk to her= 0% Your chances of getting her if you start a convo= much higher than 0. Therefore, go for it! Link to post Share on other sites
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