When should I call him?

[sally123]

Hey guys

 

I'm in a situation where I've fallen for a guy and it is probably a bad idea to pursue this but I want to try anyway.

 

We met while I was travelling, he was my friend's employee. I was instantly attracted to him and I guess it was mutual as he was always staring at me and we did kiss the night I left but we never spoke about seeing each other again and didn't share contact details but we already had each others' numbers and I think it was pretty obvious we'd see each other again next time I was there.

 

Since I've been back my friends (they're all men) have been acting weird, almost as if they were avoiding me and not telling me anything (if I ask a question about him they might ignore it) but I did eventually get told that he has a lot of problems now and seems depressed.

 

My number has changed since I've been back so I've only got his number now, no email or anything like that so I waited about a month and then text him and got no reply (about 2 weeks ago) so I assumed he wasn't interested and just left it at that but it possible he just didn't understand it and I heard he went home for Xmas so he may have been in a village where no one could translate for him either but I had no plans to message him again.

 

Anyway just 2 days ago my friend admitted that he sacked this guy because he has been using drugs and he is gone and no one knows where he is! I had no idea and I can't believe nobody told me he had all these issues. Call me stupid but I'm so worried about him, he's only 18 and I want to help him even though I know this is his problem and there's little I can do.

 

I tried to call him yesterday from a payphone and he didn't pick up, I don't want to look desperate by keep calling him but all I have is his phone number, all it would take is for him to lose him phone and I'll never see him again. I know even if he feels the same as me he has so many problems now I'm probably the last thing on his mind and he may not want to speak to anybody at all right now. Ideally I want to wait another 2 or 3 months till this has blown over but I'm so worried I'll never see him again and I just want to know if he's OK and if he wants to see me again. Do you think in this situation it's OK to keep calling every few weeks or should I indeed wait 2 or 3 months?

[Shameless87]

Sounds like you had a really strong attraction to this guy. I would try to step back and think rationally even tho I know it's hard. Sounds like he's having a rough time but there is nothing you can do. If he felt the same connection you did, he will eventually find a way to contact you. If not, you may have to accept that he's not the guy for you. If you are still thinking about him in 2 months, I don't see a problem with calling him again. I wouldn't call before then however and try not to get your hopes up. Good Luck.