Ladies, what's the deal with The Chive (date content)

[jakelongot]

So I was out on a great date with a girl a few days ago. Can't exactly remember how we got there, but at some point we begin to discuss The Chive. For those of you who are unfamiliar, it is a website which is divided up in to multiple sections and is primarily driven be user submitted photos. Some of those sections are things like "I miss college" or "So you got drunk this weekend" or "Cat pictures"...but the most popular sections are by far the "Girls" section which itself is divided up into multiple catagories. "Future Lower Back Problems", "Girls in Sports Bras" even "Mind the Gap" where women submit pictures of themselves with their legs spread.

 

Anyway...she tells me the on multiple occasions she has submitted pictures to this website. Now don't get me wrong, as a guy I am a big fan of The Chive , but I just have a hard time wrapping my mind around the upside from the girls perspective. Is it a thrill? Is it all for attention? Do you like to be treated as an object and have multiple random guys masterbating to you?

Edited January 10, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[jakelongot]

no feedback?

[sid3]

Seems a bit of a silly question. What girl wouldn't want multiple guys masterbating to them.

Nothing creepy about that.

[jakelongot]

still hoping to get some female insight.

 

TheChive just seems like a forum to objectify women. However, it seems like the women push to enforce this standard as they are submitting photos to the website.

[mammasita]

Well, I'm older and I think submitting pictures like that, especially to the chive, is a cry for attention. Yes, she enjoys the attention and thrill.

 

How many facebook pictures does she have? If it's more than 200 pictures and 500 friends, you've got an attention whore on your hands.

[jakelongot]

Well, I'm older and I think submitting pictures like that, especially to the chive, is a cry for attention. Yes, she enjoys the attention and thrill.

 

How many facebook pictures does she have? If it's more than 200 pictures and 500 friends, you've got an attention whore on your hands.

 

She has more than 500 friends and more than 200 pictures.

 

Is that all the Chive boils down to? A bunch of attention whores? Girls that a bucking the trend? Or do most women secretly want to be objectified? There are plenty of pictures on there with the heads cut off...a way of getting attention without having to be identified?

[monicaelise]

I'd love to give you some insight but I thought a chive was a little green onion-like thing you put on baked potatoes.

[jakelongot]

I'd love to give you some insight but I thought a chive was a little green onion-like thing you put on baked potatoes.

 

ha!

 

thechive.com

 

look under the heading "girls"

[monicaelise]

Well you learn something new every day.

 

Yeah, I'd say it's an attention/power thing. Lot's of women do sort of get off on the idea of jerking the chains of strangers who can't actually get near them. I wouldn't read too much into it if she's single. If this woman was your gf, and not just a date, it might be problematic, but even then, if she's not handing out contact information who cares? If she takes care of herself and is attractive, she probably just likes the validation. It doesn't necessarily mean anything bad.

Edited January 14, 2013 by monicaelise

[Fondue]

Well you learn something new every day.

 

Yeah, I'd say it's an attention/power thing. Lot's of women do sort of get off on the idea of jerking the chains of strangers who can't actually get near them. I wouldn't read too much into it if she's single. If this woman was your gf, and not just a date, it might be problematic, but even then, if she's not handing out contact information who cares? If she takes care of herself and is attractive, she probably just likes the validation. It doesn't necessarily mean anything bad.

 

I have to be honest, this is arguably me least favorite quality in person's character, man or woman.

 

I see it more often with women though, and it really saddens me. I lose a lot respect for otherwise good women whom have to validate themselves in such manner.

 

Be it by posing online, taking glamour shots and posting it for FB to garner the "likes" and horny comments from lonely guys, or anything similar.

 

People must really have self esteem issues if they're going so far to just have somebody approve of their body. It is pitiful.

[thefooloftheyear]

I have to be honest, this is arguably me least favorite quality in person's character, man or woman.

 

I see it more often with women though, and it really saddens me. I lose a lot respect for otherwise good women whom have to validate themselves in such manner.

 

Be it by posing online, taking glamour shots and posting it for FB to garner the "likes" and horny comments from lonely guys, or anything similar.

 

People must really have self esteem issues if they're going so far to just have somebody approve of their body. It is pitiful.

 

I agree...

 

Something wrong with that..And I agree with the FB comment. Too many "friends" and photos and there indicates something is wrong there. Some of these same ppl are the ones that find it necessary to start a statis update for every damn thing they do!!

 

TFOY

[monicaelise]

I have to be honest, this is arguably me least favorite quality in person's character, man or woman.

 

I see it more often with women though, and it really saddens me. I lose a lot respect for otherwise good women whom have to validate themselves in such manner.

 

Be it by posing online, taking glamour shots and posting it for FB to garner the "likes" and horny comments from lonely guys, or anything similar.

 

People must really have self esteem issues if they're going so far to just have somebody approve of their body. It is pitiful.

 

Well that's you, but I don't think the OP has to assume any of the things you're assuming. I don't think it means the girl necessarily has self esteem issues. I think that read may be a needless over-complication of things. Some people just like being recognized for their physical appearance, be it in a sexual way or otherwise. It doesn't necessarily reflect a huge character deficit.

 

I'm not a flashy sort myself, so I don't have any reason to defend the girl in question's motives, but I think it's probably a bit unfair to read as much into things as you are. There are a bazillion girls on that site and, from what I could tell, it's just a way to show of your goods, not a hookup site. Some of those girls appear to have worked very hard to create their bodies, why shouldn't they want to show them off? If they were creating great works of art and putting them out there for the public to appreciate would you feel the same way?

 

Would it be better if she were asking for money instead of looking for validation?

[jakelongot]

Well that's you, but I don't think the OP has to assume any of the things you're assuming. I don't think it means the girl necessarily has self esteem issues. I think that read may be a needless over-complication of things. Some people just like being recognized for their physical appearance, be it in a sexual way or otherwise. It doesn't necessarily reflect a huge character deficit.

 

I'm not a flashy sort myself, so I don't have any reason to defend the girl in question's motives, but I think it's probably a bit unfair to read as much into things as you are. There are a bazillion girls on that site and, from what I could tell, it's just a way to show of your goods, not a hookup site. Some of those girls appear to have worked very hard to create their bodies, why shouldn't they want to show them off? If they were creating great works of art and putting them out there for the public to appreciate would you feel the same way?

 

Would it be better if she were asking for money instead of looking for validation?

 

I know my question is in regards to the woman I went on a date with, but in general, do women feel the urge (or fight it) to put themselves on display?

 

I'm not saying it's right, but many women are objectified today. They become objects of men's desires. I'm wondering that because society supports this objectification, do women play into it? Because you are desired, do you feel the need the play into it? Is that why so many women post to The Chive?

[monicaelise]

I know my question is in regards to the woman I went on a date with, but in general, do women feel the urge (or fight it) to put themselves on display?

 

I'm not saying it's right, but many women are objectified today. They become objects of men's desires. I'm wondering that because society supports this objectification, do women play into it? Because you are desired, do you feel the need the play into it? Is that why so many women post to The Chive?

 

I don't really think there is a right or wrong about it, anymore than there's a right or wrong to being introverted/extroverted. I'm quite happy with my body so I don't much care who sees it, but I'm essentially a more introverted person so I don't get that rush that I know many women do from an external source of validation. (I'd be lying if I said it didn't make my day when someone pays me a non-sexual compliment regarding my body though.)

 

There is no general rule to be had here either. Some people enjoy attention, some folks feel uncomfortable with it. Some of us don't care much either way. As far as the girls on that site go, I say good for them. I'm sure the motivation for some of them may not be healthy, but whatever, if it brings them what they need, who cares?

 

Men are objectified every bit as much women, both by other men ("have you seen that guy's lats??") and by women ("mmmm, he's got the best tush/shoulders/eyes...") so again whatevs...