Wife has New Job - Is She Cheating?

[joblow245]

ok yall here is problem i have only been married for 7 months now.My wife has gotten a new job .Which is great cause we need the money couldnt do it without her.Keep in mind that she can be flirtous at times but when confronted she says she is just being friendly .Well she is sick alot and showed very little intrest about her job until her lately we have a kid on the way in a couple of months .i work 3rd shift she works days we see very little of each other as is /Here is my problem she cam home and said her boss offered her a new job on that would take even more time away from us and without askin me how i fealt she made OUR minds up for us and is going to take the job well at first i was no happy about it because she didnt even talk it over with me 2nd i ask did this new job come with more money she said no I ask why she is doing this to us she said she thought it would be good for her to learn more stuff and better herself but in the process of it she maybe be hurting our relationship and she said not if we loved each other I love her tons more then anyone else ever in my life but her doing this is ripping my heart open . i have a bad habit of telling her no on somethings and she knows that .Part of me is wondering if she is cheating on me or not because when i call up to her work she is most of the time on the phone .

 

and i ask who was you talking to she always tells me the same person her buddy vickie .Am i overreacting or should i stand up to her ???And confront her on this??Please help yall~~!!!!

[honey2005]

Just ask her about it, she is your wife. Tell her that you miss spending time with her and you would really appreciate it if she would get her old job back. If she says no, ask her about what's going on.

[joblow245]

i have sit her down and talked to her she says that this is the first time she has ever been asked to go higher up in a company .And she jumped on it ,but there is no more pay less time together and with our son being born in two months less family time just for her job?? Maybe i am being selfish but i just want her to put us first i no she has to work but whta she is doin may well tear a family apart .When i call iand she is on the phone with"vickie" i ask whats up where they saty on the phone together alot she says vickie is like a second mom to her and they talk about work and thats it but sometimes i dont believe she is talkin to her i ask her one time if there was any cute guys up there she said just a couple maybe but she said there attitudes ruin their looks but i think maybe she might be talkin to one of them????I have ask she swears its just vickie i dunno .i am scared of the unknown lol

[Karlise13]

It's very possible she's NOT cheating...just excited about her new job...

 

But there are some telltale signs that someone MIGHT be cheating.

 

Look out for:

 

Sudden interest in appearance (dressing up more, dressing more provacatively, sudden increase in visits to manicurist, stylist, etc.)

 

Sudden major INCREASE or DECREASE in sexual appetite

 

Leaving the room when on the phone, ending phone conversations abruptly when you enter the room

 

Very defensive when questioned about working late, coming home late

 

Having very detailed stories about where she was, why and with who. May say things like "You can call and ask so-and-so where I was!"

 

Suddenly spending A LOT more time with a new 'friend', mentioning friend's name a lot more often (this could be a 'friend' of the opposite sex with whom he/she is having an affair, or this could be a real friend of the same sex who acts as the 'beard' (alibi) for when she's really spending time with a lover)

 

The odometer on the car shows many more miles on it then would make sense when you take into account daily commute and shopping habits

 

Mysterious charges on credit card, mysterious receipts from places or for things you dont' hear about, don't see in the house (example; charges to florists, charges for hotel rooms or fancy restaurants, jewelry purchases, lingerie purchases)

 

Seeming exceptionally preoccupied, lost in thought a lot of the time

 

 

His/her mail stops coming to the house (he/she's gotten her mail forwarded to a P.O. box....getting ready to leave relationship)

 

 

Spending much more time on the internet, suddenly minimizing screen or signing off when you enter the room

 

 

Keep in mind, your wife MAY NOT be having an affair. Perhaps there's a rift in your relationship that needs fixing and she's just spending more time at work.

 

But those are some of the signs I listed

[Matilda]

As far as the affair goes, your wife is 7 months pregnant!!! I may be wrong, but I don't think during pregnancy is one of the major times affairs happen.

 

As far as the job goes, I agree with the others, talk with her more about it. Both of you should try to compromise on your positions.

[Karlise13]

I don't know about that.....

 

one of my BF's relatives experienced his wife having an affair while she was pregnant.

 

It's one of those times a woman may feel particularly insecure...and if things aren't going well, she may be susceptible to flattery from others.

[Moose]

jobblow,

 

You sound like I was say 14 or 15 years ago.

 

You know what, it was ME!!!! I had serious insecurity issues. I know a lot better now!!! You do need to tell her how you feel, then you need to lighten up on the thoughts of her cheating on you and questioning her about it.

 

Family should come first in my opinion, but it's also my choice, ( And my wife's choice ), that she stay at home and raise our kids. We aren't really too old fashioned....but we now where our priorities lie.