promod33 Posted August 20, 2004 Share Posted August 20, 2004 just wondering i have a ? my wife went to england 3 weeks ago for work my sister inlaw went also she was there 10 days and came home and wanted to split up and get a divorce. every thing was good before she left. they spent alot of time with her boss. we kinda worked things out but she had to go back to england to work and is alone with her boss after work they eat dinner together she drinks wine at dinner wich she never does with me and also they have been going for long walks . he has a girlfriend ,thats what my wife says am iover reacting thinking something is going on or should i be worried. s Link to post Share on other sites
lawofopposites Posted August 20, 2004 Share Posted August 20, 2004 Pretend you have a week off and want to visit, see what reaction you get, if alarm bells are ringing then something my dear watson is afoot. Why did she want a divorce? what kind of work are they doing? do they both live in the boss' house? why does she need to work so far? Ask about the girlfriend, what's her name, is she friendly (if you drop these things into a conversation, making out your first concern is your wifes happiness, comfortability, you can gain information) the more information you gain, the harder it is for your wife to lie (if she is), and eventually things wont add up or she'll drop herself in it. you haven't really given much information to go on. Link to post Share on other sites
promod33 Posted August 20, 2004 Share Posted August 20, 2004 she works in computer programming the company she works for has an office in england so she is traning the people there and is gone for 10 days her and her boss are staying in the same hotel . the first time she went to england my sisterinlaw was there this time my wife is alone .she said she wanted a divorce because she did not love me . i noticed that one minute she loved me next minute she hated me. first time she went i did not call her that much but this time i call her twice a day she says i am checking up on her.the thing that bothers me is that they go to dinner and walks together and she also has wine with him and when she is with me never orders alcoholshe still has to go back to england in september so i am scared or should i be scared.to back up a bit she also said she had feelings for someone at work but not her bosses name Link to post Share on other sites
TempSain Posted August 20, 2004 Share Posted August 20, 2004 sounds fishy to me. Women usually don't want a divorce unless they have emotional ties to someone else. Maybe it is the boss or someone else there. Who knows, but just seems odd that she changed her behavior and asked for a divorce all of a sudden. Like lawofopposites has mentioned, start grilling her for info. Maybe you can hire a PI there. Link to post Share on other sites
promod33 Posted August 23, 2004 Share Posted August 23, 2004 just a question my wife said went to england for work and when she came back wanted divorce did not want me to touch her or have sex with her. she gave me a whole bunch of little reason but then said she had feeling for someone at work in our country.we kind of patched things up but she had to go back to england again for 10 days. she is hanging around her boss alot there and they go for dinner every night . my question is am i over reacting with my fears.for one at dinner she is having wine wich she never has with me and also after dinner her and her boss have gone for 2 hour walks after dinner and also her her boss and 2 other people went to the show to see a show i wanted to take her to.she has been staying up till 12 o clock midnight and when she is home with me she goes to bed at 9 o clock and she says when she comes back she want to have sex she has not been real sexual with me in a while and wants to give me oral sex wich she does not like very much but on the phone says for some reason feels like it please answer me should i be worried or is it in my head Link to post Share on other sites
lawofopposites Posted August 25, 2004 Share Posted August 25, 2004 She seems to be playing games with your head, you need to find out why. By saying she wants to try and please you sexually when normally she doesn't say's to me, she's either up to no good and is feeling guilt and wants to cover her tracks or she might be seeing and hearing how other relationships work and she wants the same with you. Then again, she wanted a divorce and you never to touch her one minute.................Has she had a fling and relised it's you she wants? did she like what they did and want to try it with you? OR Is she in England at all? she might have gone on off somewhere with the one she said she has feelings for and be telling you this so you don't suspect. She might not have feelings for someone in your own country, it might be to throw you off the scent so you wont kick up a fuss when she goes off to the uk all the time. There are lots of things that spell trouble. You need to turn detective because more information is needed. Link to post Share on other sites
pixie2004 Posted August 25, 2004 Share Posted August 25, 2004 Well, I live in England... and I can tell you one thing.... GOSH these english men are charmers! Link to post Share on other sites
Scott S Posted August 25, 2004 Share Posted August 25, 2004 I don't think you're overreacting. It's apparent that she has an inappropriate realtionship with her boss. Hard to say why she's cultivating it, whether she thinks it may be career-enhancing (Ultimately it won't be!), she's got itchy feet, or perhaps she wants out of your marriage. Lawofopposites has a good idea, except rather than pretend, go ahead & take a week off to visit. Show up unexpectedly, see what's going on. You definitely have some detective work ahead of you. You have a right to know what's going on, & you need to move to protect your interests, so that if this does end up in family court yuo don't get taken to the cleaners! Good luck to you! Link to post Share on other sites
promod33 Posted August 29, 2004 Share Posted August 29, 2004 my wife is back now nothing out of the ordanary happened will have to wait for signs that some thing is up Link to post Share on other sites
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