Let It Go, By T.D. Jakes

[pureinheart]

Here it is again...I posted this a few years ago and think it bares repeating due to the powerful nature of this message:

 

 

Let it go for 2008

> By T. D. Jakes

> There are people who can walk away from you.

> And hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk

> away from you: let

> them walk.

> I don't want you to try to talk another person into

> staying with you, loving

> you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you,

> staying attached to

> you.

> I mean hang up the phone.

> When people can walk away from you let them walk.

> Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left.

> The bible said that, they came out from us that it might

> be made manifest

> that they were not for us. For had they be en of us, no

> doubt they would have

> continued with us. [1 John 2:19]

> People leave you because they are not joined to you.

> And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them

> stay.

> Let them go.

> And it doesn't mean tha t they are a bad person it

> just means that their

> part in the story is over. And you've got to know when

> people's part in your

> story is over so that you don't keep trying to raise

> the dead.

> You've got to know when it's dead.

> You've got to know when it's over. Let me tell you

> something. I've got the

> gift of good-bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I

> believe in good-bye. It's

> not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful,

> and I know whatever God means

> for me to have He'll give it to me.

> And if it takes too much sweat I don't need it.

> Stop Begging people to stay!

> Let them go!!

> If you are holding on to something that doesn't belong

> to you and was never

> intended for your life, then you need to......

> LET IT GO!!!

> If you are holding on to past hurts and pains ......

> LET IT GO!!!

> If someone can't treat you right, love you back, and

> see your worth.....

> LET IT GO!!!

> If someone has angered you .

> LET IT GO!!!

> If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and

> revenge......

> LET IT GO!!!

> If you are involved in a wrong relationship or

> addiction......

> LET IT GO!!!

> If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your

> needs or talents

> LET IT GO!!!

> If you have a bad attitude.......

> LET IT GO!!!

> If you keep judging others to make yourself feel

> better......

> LET IT GO!!!

> If you're stuck in the past and God is trying to take

> you to a new level in

> Him......

> LET IT GO!!!

> If you are struggling with the healing of a broken

> relationship.......

> LET IT GO!!!

> If you keep trying to help someon e who won't even try

> to help

> themselves......

> LET IT GO!!!

> If you're feeling depressed and stressed .........

> LET IT GO!!!

> If there is a particular situation that you are so used to

> handling yourself

> and God is saying 'take your hands off of it,'

> then you need to......

> LET IT GO!!!

> Let the past be the past. Forget the former things.

> GOD is doing a new thing for 2008!!!

> LET IT GO!!!

> Get Right or Get Left. Think about it, and then...

> LET IT GO!!!

> 'The Battle is the Lord's!'

> During the next 60 seconds, Stop whatever you are doing,

> and take this

> opportunity.

> (Literally it is only ONE minute!)

> All you have to do is the following:

> You simply say 'The Lords Prayer' for the person

> that sent you this message:

> The Lords Prayer

> FONT> Our Father, who are in Heaven, Hallowed be Thy

> Name, Thy Kingdom Come,

> Thy Will be done, on Earth as it is in Heaven. Give us

> this day, our daily

> bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those

> who trespass against

> us. And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from

> evil.

> For Thine is the Kingdom, and the Power, and the Glory,

> forever.

> Amen.

> Next, send this message to everyone you know. In a while,

> more people will

> have prayed for you and you would have obtained a lot of

> people praying for

> others!

> Next, stop and think and appreciate God's power in

> your life, for doing what

> you know is pleasing to Him.

> If you are not ashamed to do this, follow the

> instructions!

> Jesus said, If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of

> you before My

> Father'

> If you are not ashamed, send this message... only if you

> believe.

> 'Yes, I love my God. He is my fountain of Life and My

> Savior.

> He keeps me going day and night. Without Him, I am no one.

> But with Him, I

> can do everything,

> Christ is my strength.' This is a simple test.

> If you love God and you are not ashamed of all the great

> things that He has

> done for you, send this to everyone you know, and the

> person that sent it to

> you!

> God loves you and watches over you everyday.

[pureinheart]

Please feel free to verbally let people, places, and things (and hurtful situations) go.

 

Long story short. After the split up with my daughters father, he connected with his now ex-wife. She was continuously jealous of me and my daughter. I tried very hard to cause her to be at ease, telling her I was done and encouraging her to move forward with the relationship with my ex.

 

She is/was a master at decentions and manipulations. She forbid that my ex pay child support as it cut into "her" money (interesting that she was collecting for her daughter from her ex). She forbid my ex to see his daughter, and he went along with it.

 

They constantly harrassed me with phone calls, threats and coming to my home. I think the police were called about 4-5 times due to her and him getting way out of hand...the were both psychos. They would come over unannounced specifically to start trouble, one time she layed hands on me, trying to push me and I didn't move...that scared her, so her mouth became her major weapon.

 

The ex threatened me physically so I went to the DA to file charges and a restraining order under "Terrorist Threats"...this scared him and he sucked up. I then went to the DA and demanded that they cancel back child support owed and all future payments (he never made a single payment). The DA contacted me letting me know he was making over 5K bring home and did I really want to do this...I said YES, I want these two psychos out of my life ASAP.

 

Money wasn't the issue for me, I wanted my daughter to have a relationship with her father, and since that wasn't going to happen, and for the better anyway, I just wanted them GONE.

 

FTR, if this were happening today...I would handle this much differently, much like I handled matters back in the day.

 

They were gone, although both of them continued to run their mouths to the ex's family (I was very close to his family) and they did some horrible things trying to take my kids...it will be very hard to forgive all of that.

 

A few years later she had the ex thrown in jail for spousal abuse, he spent four months in county...and quess who was there for him...me and my daughter.

 

There was constant drama between the two of them and his family began to realise that I was not the bad guy here.

 

I was there for him several times over the years as they had split and he re-married...his new wife saw the real deal fast and bailed (smart girl).

 

This last summer he had a stroke (he had previously had three heart attacks) AND who was there for him...yep....

 

By this time the entire family, shall I say hated his second wife and we all thought they were history...oh and she went after him for child support (they had twin boys together)...classic. Anyway, my daughter calls me to let me know her dad was at the ER...I go there freaked out only to discover second ex-wife is there...didn't think to much about at the time. Figured if she freaked on me in any way, we would get down (remember, I'm different now).

 

All of the family flew in from different states and we all met up at the ex's house...strange thing was second ex-wife was always there. His mother was shocked along with the rest of the family...his mother has the most issues with her as she went through most of the drama with them. His mother was explicit in the past of letting him know she didnot want to ever deal with her again.

 

After a few days we realised that second ex was living there. We ALL felt as if we were slapped in the face, especially his mother...she's 72 and not in the greatest of health and flew all of that way to find this...he always was a liar though.

 

It was horrible, and when I discovered they were together again I wanted nothing to do with the stuation. I couldn't STAND being around her anyway, and really just wanted to lay hands on her this time. She played so many games, but the family saw through it bigtime- it was just a mess, she was still messing with him after having a stroke...but guess he kind of deserves it.

 

So much for long story short, right:rolleyes: and this really is the much shorter version. Anyway, the ex had recovered priddy well from the stroke and stopped by on his way to my grandsons birthday party ...I asked him what the deal was and he told me that he was with second ex and that if any of us didn't like it we could get the F out of his life....NO PROBLEM BUDDY.

 

Did I want to get back together with him after 25 years...not at all, there was some sentiment from the past as he had the ability to be a cool person. He had hit on me several times throughout the years and it made my skin crawl, I seriously liked him as a friend.

 

Can you imagine how awkward that was for all of us??? Here is a stoke victim, he almost died and was very sick. We all walked on eggshells not knowing what was really going on...and his mother, what a HORRIBLE experience for her.

 

Now, if he should come over for what ever reason (he still has ties with our daughter and does stuff for her) I make sure I'm not here.

 

I really needed to release this and am soooo done with toxic people. My daughter is turning toxic now, seems as if unless she has a use for me, I don't hear from her...

 

Ok, Bishop Jakes, I've released it, and am letting it go. God bless you all:D

Edited January 12, 2013 by pureinheart

[TheFinalWord]

Thanks for sharing that with us PIH. You're on my prayer list

 

TD Jakes is the man:

 

Let Them Walk - Bishop T.D. Jakes - YouTube

 

There's a friend that sticks closer than a brother

 

"Though my father and mother forsake me, the Lord will receive me."

 

More to add soon

 

God Bless You!!

[Teknoe]

Thank you for posting this. Timely!

[M30USA]

Well, my XW is the one that divorced me because I refused to reconcile without her taking accountibility for her actions. So she left. Of course, I would bet a million dollars that she is telling her family that I am the one who "abandoned" the family.

Edited January 12, 2013 by M30USA

[pureinheart]

Thanks for sharing that with us PIH. You're on my prayer list

 

TD Jakes is the man:

 

Let Them Walk - Bishop T.D. Jakes - YouTube

 

There's a friend that sticks closer than a brother

 

"Though my father and mother forsake me,the Lord will receive me."

 

More to add soon

 

God Bless You!!

 

Thank you soooooo much TFW! You are on mine too, God knows what you need:D

 

I like this UTube video better. OP was a old email that I saved...but the video I will watch a million times now (no lie) to get it into my system permanently. There is another sermon by TD that is on cassette tape and have listened to it over 3-400 times. We can heal the body, but if the mind is toxic...well...

[pureinheart]

Thank you for posting this. Timely!

 

LOL T, after reading your thread it is...God is so good! Hey thank you for your thread too...and VERY timely! In talking to my friend, it gave me a weird feeling, like there was something wrong with me...and ya, there is a lot wrong with me:)

 

(this response is crossing threads/responses with T's thread)

[pureinheart]

Well, my XW is the one that divorced me because I refused to reconcile without her taking accountibility for her actions. So she left. Of course, I would bet a million dollars that she is telling her family that I am the one who "abandoned" the family.

 

You can count on this fact ( your entire post). There are a lot out there that are unable to look objectively on many things, especially relationships. It's always the other "guy".

 

In my case, the break up was because of me, although if one looks objectively concerning the entire relationship...it was a combination.

 

He demonised me to come out as the victim. He went to friends, his family and MINE even, telling of my horrible conduct. I never defended myself to anyone, I knew the truth and that was all I needed. I figured they never "knew" me should they believe I was entirely at fault. And in the past, I never told anyone of the HORRID things he did to me...felt it was our business, not to be taken to the streets so that others would feel "sorry" for me...no need for that type of validation.

 

M30, that relationship may have never survived anyway. having read most of your story have to say that you got the better end of the deal. I know it hurt you greatly, and has NOT been easy, although at times we need to stand our ground and let go, as then and only then can God take over... GBU Brother:)

[TheFinalWord]

Wow, that's crazy PIH. Life is too short; I agree we have to forgive and just let toxic, bitter people go from our lives. We can't change them, only Jesus can and we're not Him

Be not silent, O God of my praise! For wicked and deceitful mouths are opened against me, speaking against me with lying tongues. They encircle me with words of hate,and attack me without cause. In return for my love they accuse me, but I give myself to prayer. So they reward me evil for good, and hatred for my love.

 

Here is Jesus, being smacked and disrespected for speaking the truth:

 

“I have spoken openly to the world,” Jesus replied. “I always taught in synagogues or at the temple, where all the Jews come together. I said nothing in secret. Why question me? Ask those who heard me. Surely they know what I said.” When Jesus said this, one of the officials nearby slapped him in the face. “Is this the way you answer the high priest?” he demanded. “If I said something wrong,” Jesus replied, “testify as to what is wrong. But if I spoke the truth, why did you strike me?”

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=198QGsa7bwU

 

I was watching this video the other day, and made me realize what is important in life. This life is a vapor, there is not time to spend trying to "fix" people that only use and abuse. Especially if we are helping them at the expense of the people God wants in our lives to edify us and shape us.

 

A DYING MANS LAST WORDS, A MESSAGE FROM GOD - YouTube

[M30USA]

TFW, so true..but what about when these people are our spouses? I am in a situation where there is NO SOLUTION. Having divorced, I know I did something God hates; but if I had remained married, it would have been bad for everybody--including the kids.

[pureinheart]

TFW, so true..but what about when these people are our spouses? I am in a situation where there is NO SOLUTION. Having divorced, I know I did something God hates; but if I had remained married, it would have been bad for everybody--including the kids.

 

Yes God does hate divorce, and I can imagine the struggle you have gone through. I have quite a different perception concerning this matter.

 

I believe you were in Gods permissive will, and not His perfect will. The Bible says, for what GOD has joined together let no man put assunder. Can you honestly say this marriage was of God. IMO, I don't think so..

 

Will pray that God will give you confirmation that will be undeniable. God did this for me with a marriage that was TOTALLY out of the will of God...still I needed confirmation that I was doing the right thing. LOL, he left me, and he persued the divorce, although I wanted to be sure...and M30, God gave it to me bigtime.

[pureinheart]

Wow, that's crazy PIH. Life is too short; I agree we have to forgive and just let toxic, bitter people go from our lives. We can't change them, only Jesus can and we're not Him

 

Be not silent, O God of my praise! For wicked and deceitful mouths are opened against me, speaking against me with lying tongues. They encircle me with words of hate,and attack me without cause. In return for my love they accuse me, but I give myself to prayer. So they reward me evil for good, and hatred for my love.

 

Here is Jesus, being smacked and disrespected for speaking the truth:

 

“I have spoken openly to the world,” Jesus replied. “I always taught in synagogues or at the temple, where all the Jews come together. I said nothing in secret. Why question me? Ask those who heard me. Surely they know what I said.” When Jesus said this, one of the officials nearby slapped him in the face. “Is this the way you answer the high priest?” he demanded. “If I said something wrong,” Jesus replied, “testify as to what is wrong. But if I spoke the truth, why did you strike me?”

 

Passion of The Christ - Jesus before The Sanhedrin - YouTube

 

I was watching this video the other day, and made me realize what is important in life. This life is a vapor, there is not time to spend trying to "fix" people that only use and abuse. Especially if we are helping them at the expense of the people God wants in our lives to edify us and shape us.

 

A DYING MANS LAST WORDS, A MESSAGE FROM GOD - YouTube

 

This is AWESOME (as usual:D ), I just can't tell you how your words minister to me and others. Life IS a vapor, and that is why there is a desire to have this done and go back to the real business of life. Sometimes we don't realise there are unresolved issues until situations bring them to our attention. There is a tendancy (for me) to just want to be happy and love everyone...and this is the right heart to have, although it will manifest in nonconsistant ways if issues are locked up inside.

 

TFW, I had no idea all of this hate, hurt, and anger was so buried. It has come to light now, so am SOOOOO grateful to God for unlocking this door:)

[M30USA]

Yes God does hate divorce, and I can imagine the struggle you have gone through. I have quite a different perception concerning this matter.

 

I believe you were in Gods permissive will, and not His perfect will. The Bible says, for what GOD has joined together let no man put assunder. Can you honestly say this marriage was of God. IMO, I don't think so..

 

Will pray that God will give you confirmation that will be undeniable. God did this for me with a marriage that was TOTALLY out of the will of God...still I needed confirmation that I was doing the right thing. LOL, he left me, and he persued the divorce, although I wanted to be sure...and M30, God gave it to me bigtime.

 

Yes, my ex pursued the divorce too. It's funny...but I was just kind of "waiting it out" to see what she'd do. She kept on asking me if I wanted to reconcile, basically told me she wasn't returning my kids if I didn't reconcile. All I was waiting for was an apology for the physical abuse/tirade episode and her to get therapy. She couldn't even aplogize. She said I pretty much caused her to do it. And if I didn't get her angry, she wouldn't have done it.

[TheFinalWord]

This is AWESOME (as usual:D ), I just can't tell you how your words minister to me and others. Life IS a vapor, and that is why there is a desire to have this done and go back to the real business of life. Sometimes we don't realise there are unresolved issues until situations bring them to our attention. There is a tendancy (for me) to just want to be happy and love everyone...and this is the right heart to have, although it will manifest in nonconsistant ways if issues are locked up inside.

 

That's because you're a nice person

 

Whoever corrects a mocker invites insults;

whoever rebukes the wicked incurs abuse.

Do not rebuke mockers or they will hate you;

rebuke the wise and they will love you.

Instruct the wise and they will be wiser still;

teach the righteous and they will add to their learning.

 

A fool finds pleasure in wicked schemes,

but a person of understanding delights in wisdom.

 

TFW, I had no idea all of this hate, hurt, and anger was so buried. It has come to light now, so am SOOOOO grateful to God for unlocking this door:)

 

Yeah, we have to get the junk out of the soul. I think we've all faced temptation to hate someone for wronging us. When that happens, I give it to the Lord and ask him to remove it from my heart. I refuse to let someone else's folly hinder my walk with the Lord and steal my joy.

 

[pureinheart]

That's because you're a nice person

 

Whoever corrects a mocker invites insults;

whoever rebukes the wicked incurs abuse.

Do not rebuke mockers or they will hate you;

rebuke the wise and they will love you.

Instruct the wise and they will be wiser still;

teach the righteous and they will add to their learning.

 

A fool finds pleasure in wicked schemes,

but a person of understanding delights in wisdom.

 

 

 

Yeah, we have to get the junk out of the soul. I think we've all faced temptation to hate someone for wronging us. When that happens, I give it to the Lord and ask him to remove it from my heart. I refuse to let someone else's folly hinder my walk with the Lord and steal my joy.

 

 

Awwww, thank you TFW...

 

This scripture is quite interesting, and will look it up and study it because it seems to me that it is somewhat like the scripture that says not to cast your pearls before swine...but like said, need to study it:)

 

I know I've been doing things all wrong- many things. The focus needs to be prayer and truth, as all the rest will burn. Lately have been so earthly minded that I'm no heavenly good.

[TheFinalWord]

Awwww, thank you TFW...

 

This scripture is quite interesting, and will look it up and study it because it seems to me that it is somewhat like the scripture that says not to cast your pearls before swine...but like said, need to study it:)

 

I know I've been doing things all wrong- many things. The focus needs to be prayer and truth, as all the rest will burn. Lately have been so earthly minded that I'm no heavenly good.

 

Those are from Proverbs 9 and 10 There are so many gems about dealing with mockers and those that use hate and spite to push their will on others...

 

Better to meet a bear robbed of her cubs

than a fool bent on folly.

 

That illustration speaks volumes. Don't fight a fool using their tactics.

 

"Answer not a fool according to his folly, or you will be like him"

 

An unfriendly person pursues selfish ends

and against all sound judgment starts quarrels. Fools find no pleasure in understanding

but delight in airing their own opinions.

 

I don't waste time trying to help those that are not humble or are bent on evil and mischief. lol Lessons have been learned. You only have to get burned a few times in life to figure out there are users and manipulators in this world. You're a kind person and always give mercy. I have the same temperament, but have found our greatest blessings in life can also be our greatest curse if we don't temper them with God's instructions. For example, when you are nice and forgiving, people will take advantage. It's good to learn how to prevent abuse and what to do when dealing with such a person. Typically these types bring drama into our lives, so I am more of a prevention mindset these days lol The main thing is these people can distract us from helping the people that God really wants us to focus on

 

Here are some of my notes from a study of Proverbs on this topic I did a few years ago I thought you might enjoy since it seems you have a few of them in your life

 

--Access will not change a fool; Proximity to you will not change them (look at Judas; he had access to Christ)

--Confrontation doesn’t change a fool; they just become more clever. Confrontation to a fool is like telling a thief where the camera is;

--Don’t try to build a relationship with a liar

--Gifts do not change a fool

o Give gifts as a reward not as a door

o Stop giving gifts to fools

o A fool will hate you when you stop giving them gifts

 

--Anything permitted increases.

--Misplaced mercy…believing people that are not trustworthy.

--Know you weaknesses; ask yourself, “if I was my enemy, how would I destroy me?”

--Give people opportunities instead of intellectual property

--Don’t give your harvest to someone who didn’t qualify for it.

--The only way satan can destroy a seed sower is to put bad soil in front of him

--The proof of gratitude is the intent to reimburse

--Don’t trust anyone that forgets their debts

--Conversation is an investment; do you want a return on your investment?

--When somebody warns you, take it seriously.

Edited January 13, 2013 by TheFinalWord

[pureinheart]

Yes, my ex pursued the divorce too. It's funny...but I was just kind of "waiting it out" to see what she'd do. She kept on asking me if I wanted to reconcile, basically told me she wasn't returning my kids if I didn't reconcile. All I was waiting for was an apology for the physical abuse/tirade episode and her to get therapy. She couldn't even aplogize. She said I pretty much caused her to do it. And if I didn't get her angry, she wouldn't have done it.

 

Remember Flip Wilson, he'd joke with the saying, "the devil made me do it", and think he coined that phrase...your ex reminds me of this unfortunately.

 

Pride...one very powerful word.

 

M30, remembering a time in which pride was so ever present in me (it still is, but know it and fight it now). In 1993, after just starting a restoration to God program through the Assemblies of God church, I was blaming everyone and everything around me- was going through some keepsakes and broke down. The Spirit of humility overcame me and showed me the horrible things I'd done. I cried for four days straight. That hurt.

 

Pride is a difficult thing to overcome because even when one is humbled, the aftermath can be much more pride. Humility for the very prideful can result in a feeling of weakness and this feeling is extremely uncomfortable. Pride can be a result of extreme deep inner/outward hurt, a defense mechanism if you will. Where ever there is pride there is great hurt IMO.

 

I'm really sensing heavily in the Spirit that this is what needed to happen. Now possibly in the soulish realm, I wouldn't write the relationship off completely because IMO God can fix anything...this could be that eternal optimism of which I love to operate in:)

 

I am reminded though of a friend that I prayed with MANY hours/days concening her marriage. For over thirty years she and all of us prayed for her husbands salvation. He was abusive (really bad), not physically but emotionally. She eventually lost all of the hair on her body and he became much worse. He had many EMA's (extra marital affairs), wouldn't work and so on.

 

We all advised her to leave although she dissed us, so in order to keep her as a friend we all backed her...I mean she would have remained our friend as she is absolutely the most anointed/beautiful person I've yet to see, but we loved her so much that we needed to back her.

 

She finally left abot a year ago...we were all floored. Her words to him will not return void and I see a death bed experience as that is what it will take most likely.

 

M30, no matter how much we wish things could be different, there is still free will...and want to say I agree with predestination because God knows the future.

 

I could go on forever on this subject and go in circles sort of, back and forth from hope to reality so will just pray for all you guys:)

[M30USA]

Pure,

 

I can truthfully say right now...I would STILL take my wife back if I KNEW that she had undergone a real repentance and conviction over her abuse. But the last communication we had, it was the same thing: my fault.

 

I've made peace with fact that she will forever be this way. And if some miracle of God (like Paul on way to Damascus) happens, then I'll reconsider.

Edited January 13, 2013 by M30USA

[pureinheart]

Those are from Proverbs 9 and 10 There are so many gems about dealing with mockers and those that use hate and spite to push their will on others...

 

Better to meet a bear robbed of her cubs

than a fool bent on folly.

 

That illustration speaks volumes. Don't fight a fool using their tactics.

 

"Answer not a fool according to his folly, or you will be like him"

 

An unfriendly person pursues selfish ends

and against all sound judgment starts quarrels. Fools find no pleasure in understanding

but delight in airing their own opinions.

 

I don't waste time trying to help those that are not humble or are bent on evil and mischief. lol Lessons have been learned. You only have to get burned a few times in life to figure out there are users and manipulators in this world. You're a kind person and always give mercy. I have the same temperament, but have found our greatest blessings in life can also be our greatest curse if we don't temper them with God's instructions. For example, when you are nice and forgiving, people will take advantage. It's good to learn how to prevent abuse and what to do when dealing with such a person. Typically these types bring drama into our lives, so I am more of a prevention mindset these days lol The main thing is these people can distract us from helping the people that God really wants us to focus on

 

Here are some of my notes from a study of Proverbs on this topic I did a few years ago I thought you might enjoy since it seems you have a few of them in your life

 

--Access will not change a fool; Proximity to you will not change them (look at Judas; he had access to Christ)

--Confrontation doesn’t change a fool; they just become more clever. Confrontation to a fool is like telling a thief where the camera is;

--Don’t try to build a relationship with a liar

--Gifts do not change a fool

o Give gifts as a reward not as a door

o Stop giving gifts to fools

o A fool will hate you when you stop giving them gifts

 

--Anything permitted increases.

--Misplaced mercy…believing people that are not trustworthy.

--Know you weaknesses; ask yourself, “if I was my enemy, how would I destroy me?”

--Give people opportunities instead of intellectual property

--Don’t give your harvest to someone who didn’t qualify for it.

--The only way satan can destroy a seed sower is to put bad soil in front of him

--The proof of gratitude is the intent to reimburse

--Don’t trust anyone that forgets their debts

--Conversation is an investment; do you want a return on your investment?

--When somebody warns you, take it seriously.

 

WOW, in these few words you just identified ways in which I am extremely misguided! Am going to print this out and make a ton of copies, placing them EVERYWHERE. Thank you!

 

This is beyond a "light bulb" experience, this is the equivilent (sp?) of the light the sun gives.

 

Being an all or nothing person, this leaves little room for balance in some cases. Not that all or nothing is all bad, it's just having the wisdom to know where to apply it. AWESOME!

[pureinheart]

Pure,

 

I can truthfully say right now...I would STILL take my wife back if I KNEW that she had undergone a real repentance and conviction over her abuse. But the last communication we had, it was the same thing: my fault.

 

I've made peace with fact that she will forever be this way. And if some miracle of God (like Paul on way to Damascus) happens, then I'll reconsider.

 

You know, I get where you're coming from. My daughters father was the love of my life. We were both unsaved upon meeting, although in some ways I felt he was answer to prayer. All of the signs/red flags were there, BUT, he would change, right? LOL. Had I accepted the things I began to see, with no expectations of change, things might have been better.

 

In some cases people don't change in ways we would like, and in fact become worse. If I got into the hideous things he did to me and others, it would blow your mind.

 

Years after the divorce, when he'd hit on me my skin did crawl. I had contemplated reconcilliation, some had prophecied it, but my heart and mind were not in agreement.

 

Now, with this thread, the wisdom in it, has confirmed why I always held back.

 

I think you have a well-balanced concept concerning people and behavior. I don't. I can have some priddy powerful suggestions and counsel for others, but when it comes to my own situations, I fail miserably. This thread is cutting off the spirit of self-imposed failures. It's causing me to understand why I made past decisions and it's importance to stick with them:), and now seeing that even friendship with this individual is ot an option...or with ANY ex for that matter- there is good reasons why they are ex's:D ...I feel good and confident, thank you guys:D

[TheFinalWord]

WOW, in these few words you just identified ways in which I am extremely misguided! Am going to print this out and make a ton of copies, placing them EVERYWHERE. Thank you!

 

This is beyond a "light bulb" experience, this is the equivilent (sp?) of the light the sun gives.

 

Being an all or nothing person, this leaves little room for balance in some cases. Not that all or nothing is all bad, it's just having the wisdom to know where to apply it. AWESOME!

 

Glad it helped you Those aren't all my tips...they're tidbits I've picked up from pastors, books, and studying Proverbs, mixed with my own experiences with users and abusers.