What do you think?

[cuddlebug20]

Ok here's the deal....I've been great friends with this guy for 6 almost 7 months now. Since June we've been friends in person and not just online....two weeks ago things got extremely hot and heavy between us and we had s*x....it was awesome and everything I had hoped it would be however, I don't think I was emotionally ready to move to that.

 

We are "just friends" he said he wanted to stay friends for a while then we would see how things are and he said that he deffinately could see us as a couple that we had great potential...thing is: I'm ready to be an actual couple right now....I'm ready and I'm wanting more from our friendship. I love what we have but I also want to feel like I'm his and he's mine, I want that security that comes with being bf/gf....I hate saying, yes, I'm single but I am talking to someone....it makes it so tempting to just forget about it and move on, it's very tiring at times, but I do care a lot about him, it gets a bit frustrating...I feel like he's playing hard to get.

 

I'm afraid to let him know how I feel. I've sent him a couple of mushy emails and he loved them he said they made him feel really good....he tells me that he cares for me a lot but I just don't know....I'm scared that I'm being used but it's different then the last time a guy used me....he's always wanting to please me and etc. So, I don't think he is using me.

 

What should I do? should I just sit and wait and let it happen naturally...I pretty much told him I loved him in a subtle way if he didn't notice it then he's stupid lol. I think he's just taking his precious time and thinks that I'll be here for him no matter how long he takes.....he's 35 and will be 36 in november...I'm 20. He talks in general about wanting to get married and having kids someday...heck if he doesn't get started soon it's gonna be too late lol....not really but he sure is taking his time lol. He says that we have become very close friends and that he considers me a very very close friend.....is he throwing hints at me that he IS ready for more? The guys I've been with in the past always made that first move into a serious relationship....never me! So...I'm clueless!

 

Any advice is appreciated!

 

Here is a conversation we had online a couple of nights ago....what's your opinion on it?

 

Me: that's good...I could pay it if I wanted to but dad's a bit greedy with his money lol well...that's if it isn't for him

 

Him: well if u really need to see a doctor, i will do what i can im not rolling in money, but i can handle a doctors visit

 

Me: that's so sweet of you....but I'm pretty sure I'll be fine I've did this before packing huge ass boxes of oranges and apples for the band....a heating pad tonight should help

 

Him: well i worry about u, i consider u a very very close friend, and i dont want to see anything bad happen to u

 

Me: got b*tched out this mornin for using the bathroom had only been in there a few mins. and well I was having some complications...think I hurt something yesterday, so I came out and mom said youve been in there an hour about time you get out....I said well hell I'm sorry I'm on my period and it's a bit heavy this morning

 

Him: whew, that really sux, i hope u didnt hurt yourself bad yesterday, im not sure u woudl tell me if u did, but i can tell u did some damage to yourself

 

Me: well I really don't know...I don't think I did, but I have been a bit heavy today....more than usual, I don't hurt though, so I don't think I hurt anything

 

Him: ok, i want u to promise me that if u do feel any pain there, u will tell me, and that u will go to teh doctor, thats not something u mess around with ok?

 

Me: I promise....really nice to have someone that cares....told mom and she said well it's not my fault lol I was like well ok

 

Him: that is one area where i have a big problem with your parents, they can be really cold sometimes, im hoping they dont mean to be on purpose, but i dont know, i have just never seen people that could talk that way to thier child, i wasnt raised that way, if i said i had a pain at all, my mom was all over me trying to find out what it was... but i do care about u, alot besides the obvious, u and i have gotten to be really close friends, so i dotn want to see anything happen to u, and i know how u are, u have to be in alot of pain before u will tell anyone

 

 

Him: thast what u call one of those serious talks

 

Me: Yep sure is

 

Him: probably dont want to even bother calling tonite now, since we have had such a good talk on here huh?

 

Me: lol nah

 

Me: silly

 

Him: i figured it was time to make u smile

 

Me: awwww hehe well it worked

 

Him: well i know how to make u laugh

 

Me: yes you do lol

 

Him: since u arent at 100% tonite, u have 5 minutes to call me

 

Me: hehe awwwww thank you, I do have to use the ladies room then I'll call ya lol

 

Him: ok, seriously, take ur time ok?

 

Me: ok I will

 

Him: bye for now

[moimeme]

....I hate saying, yes, I'm single but I am talking to someone....it makes it so tempting to just forget about it and move on

 

This I don't get. If he's that great and wonderful and fantastic, why would you be so eager to move on? Great things and great relationships take time to build. He's very smart in not wanting to rush it. However, if your need is to be in a relationship with no-matter-who, then by all means move on and do it quickly since he deserves someone who wants him for him and not for the sake of having a relationship.

[cuddlebug20]

then by all means move on and do it quickly since he deserves someone who wants him for him and not for the sake of having a relationship

 

That's not it at all...the only thing that is bothering me is....am I wasting my time waiting just to find out that he may not want something serious with me...I can wait for years if I know that he does want that kind of relationship with me eventually...I know he said that he could see us "together" someday....but was he just blowing at the mouth? I have some major trust issues and I'm working on them....do you think I'm reading too far into the conversation....to me it sounds as if he is growing fond of me and does in deed care a LOT for me....

[tokyo]

I don´t think he will have a relationship with you, you are very young and you are

probably not going to have kids now, do you? I think he would like to keep you, but

not have a serious relationship with you. He sleeps with you and still doesn´t know

what he wants? Doesn´t look like he´s taking it very serious. Sorry to say that.

[kbambam]

you just need to do it quick

 

 

he would rather want someone who wants him for him and not just for a realationship