Hopeless relationships

[Scottie]

What happened? we dated for a year, i found out that she lied about secretly talking to another guy, so i broke it off. i started dating another woman that was tremendusly

 

beautiful and she hated it.

 

after a while so did i, my life went down hill while dating this new one. d.u.i., lost job at hospital had to move out of my apt. because my roomates were tired of it.

 

i got a job at the bar i worked at for the past 7 years,and

 

we got back together. i moved in with her, everything was great. we started having money probs. so i luckly got back in at the hosp. she got a job at a different bar. after a few mos. we started to argue , she wouldnt let go of the fact that i dated the other one. said things like i broke up to go out with her and stuff like that.

 

the past 3 mos. i've found guys #'s around , i cant go into the bar she works at because someone told me she was cheating on me there, when i confronted her she blew up, got me 86ed, and said that she doesnt think its a good idea that we live together any more because she is going through a crisis and needs space. weve spent less and less time together laitly, she bought a cell phone and pager, still finding guys #'s around. and she comes home and sleeps on the couch. we havnt had sex in 4 mos and she wont even touch me, i cant even see her naked. i'm moving in with a good friend whose going through it also, but i cant stop loving her so easaly. what did i do? why is she acting this way? i feel like a fool for taking her back in the first place. someone give me some straight advice. please!!!!!!

[Tony T]

Dozens of men just hand their numbers over to women who work in bars. That's just part of the job. If she was cheating on you, she would put the numbers out for you to see and she would be away from your place for hours beyond those she works. Because she's pissed at your, she hasn't been throwing them away at work anymore, she's been bringing them home to ruffle your feathers. She isn't dumb!!! You're not a very good detective.

 

Someone told you she was cheating on you where she works. Pretty good trick. She is probably talking to people. Guys like to pour their troubles out to the people who work there. Happens every day. It could look like she's cheating but unless she's having sex with them on the bar table, she's just doing her job.

 

Anyway, it sounds like you don't trust her anymore because of these wild thoughts. She doesn't trust you because of dating this other woman. You're not having sex anymore. You sleep separately. She has 86ed you from where she works. It seems to be just an ugly situation. There is no communication and the two of you are totally unable to resolve your differences. The relationship is in critical condition.

 

If you can't sit down with her and get all this resolved, either by yourselves or with the help of a counsellor, you need to split. For the sake of future relationships, you need to try to at least resolve some of these misunderstandings calmly so you can go into your next relationship without some of the goofball notions you carry with you.

 

The situation you're in now is not a pretty one. Fix it or get out of it. Life is way too short...and don't let things get this bad every again.

[Scottie]

Dozens of men just hand their numbers over to women who work in bars. That's just part of the job. If she was cheating on you, she would put the numbers out for you to see and she would be away from your place for hours beyond those she works. Because she's pissed at your, she hasn't been throwing them away at work anymore, she's been bringing them home to ruffle your feathers. She isn't dumb!!! You're not a very good detective.

 

Someone told you she was cheating on you where she works. Pretty good trick. She is probably talking to people. Guys like to pour their troubles out to the people who work there. Happens every day. It could look like she's cheating but unless she's having sex with them on the bar table, she's just doing her job. Anyway, it sounds like you don't trust her anymore because of these wild thoughts. She doesn't trust you because of dating this other woman. You're not having sex anymore. You sleep separately. She has 86ed you from where she works. It seems to be just an ugly situation. There is no communication and the two of you are totally unable to resolve your differences. The relationship is in critical condition. If you can't sit down with her and get all this resolved, either by yourselves or with the help of a counsellor, you need to split. For the sake of future relationships, you need to try to at least resolve some of these misunderstandings calmly so you can go into your next relationship without some of the goofball notions you carry with you. The situation you're in now is not a pretty one. Fix it or get out of it. Life is way too short...and don't let things get this bad every again.

[Scottie]

I understand that I might be a bad detective but,why all of a sudden the cell,and pgr? Why all the after hrs drinking with guys that I don't really enjoy being around?

 

Did we make a mistake by moving in, or have we been through

 

way to much already and it's too late.

[Tony T]

It seems like she's trying to give you a message. She is showing the relationship a great deal of disrespect. You will be showing your ownself a great deal of disrespect if you don't take some action soon. You are obviously not happy with this situation.

[Deejette]

It sounds like she has not forgiven you for seeing that other woman and is taking a form of revenge. But I don't see how you can patch it up with her, unless you sincerely tell her how miserable you were with that other woman, that it was a mistake, and that you really want to build a great relationship with her.

It seems like she's trying to give you a message. She is showing the relationship a great deal of disrespect. You will be showing your ownself a great deal of disrespect if you don't take some action soon. You are obviously not happy with this situation.