oral sex

[bj]

i was just curious on seeing others' opinion on this:

 

let's say i've been dating some girl for like 2 months.

 

and we've spent the night with each other like 3 times,

 

but we havent had sex.

 

she ends up giving me a blowjob.

 

girls: how does your view of the guy change after that?

 

guys: how does your view of the girl change after she does that?

 

if it's happened to you, what went through your mind after she did that? did you think of her differently?

 

how so?

[Tony T]

It really depends on the relationship. If I like the girl and the context of the oral sex was a healthy one, there's no reason for my opinion of her to change. It all sounds OK to me. I have no less respect for her. For a girl to give oral sex to a guy is a pretty good tribute.

 

It may depend on my previous experiences, if I was young. But I have learned to expect almost anything. People behave according to their experiences and how they feel.

 

Now, if you're wondering why she has yet given herself for intercourse, you need to ask her. Maybe she likes to wait much longer. Maybe she's a virgin. Maybe she has medical problems. That's a question you need to ask her, when the timing is right.

 

I'm still not sure if I've given you the answer you want. Your question is sort of vague. If you don't get the answers you're looking for, re-post the question and be more specific.

[sarah]

bj -

 

as a girl who has been in this situation, this is what i will say. i will not give a guy oral sex, or any kind of sex, unless i am sure i care about him and he cares about me. so my view of the guy doesn't change after the deed is done, but before it has happened. at the same time, i find that any sexual act changes the dynamic of a relationship - makes me feel more committed to the other person - strengthens my feelings for my partner - that's why i tend to wait before getting sexual with a boyfriend. also, oral sex is generally not a pleasant thing to think about or perform at first - if this was one of her first times, she may come away feeling a little weirded out, but i have found that those feelings subside and, if the relationship is a good one, the desire to please your partner grows, allowing you to enjoy what may seem like an unenjoyable activity. hope this helps.

[Deejette]

It sounds like you have second thoughts about this girl because she was willing to do such an intimate act on such short acquaintance. Maybe you are wondering whether she does or did that with other people too.

bj - as a girl who has been in this situation, this is what i will say. i will not give a guy oral sex, or any kind of sex, unless i am sure i care about him and he cares about me. so my view of the guy doesn't change after the deed is done, but before it has happened. at the same time, i find that any sexual act changes the dynamic of a relationship - makes me feel more committed to the other person - strengthens my feelings for my partner - that's why i tend to wait before getting sexual with a boyfriend. also, oral sex is generally not a pleasant thing to think about or perform at first - if this was one of her first times, she may come away feeling a little weirded out, but i have found that those feelings subside and, if the relationship is a good one, the desire to please your partner grows, allowing you to enjoy what may seem like an unenjoyable activity. hope this helps.