Darth Vader Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 My children do know about the A. He told them, all 3 in a very very ugly way. In an ugly way? Did he graphically tell tell them what happened? That's not right to do that, and perhaps that was done out of revenge against you and to pit them against you. That ain't right! However, you have to remember that's part of the consequences of your actions that led to this! So, to sum it up, if you hadn't cheated, none of this would have happened! BS's will attack WS's in several ways including harmful ways. Do your children realize you cheated on them as well? If not, you have to tell them you cheated on them as well, why? Because of all the time you stole from them by not being there with them, missing events, being snappy at them, bad attitudes because of affair, etc., and giving that time stole/lost to your OM. You still may not see all the ramifications of your actions, not to mention you teaching them it's ok to cheat/have affair on one's spouse. Your actions speak louder than words! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Darth Vader Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 Yes they do. But then, they live in my house, they have many things in their past that their father has done that THEY remember. I've kept many things from them so they wouldn't have to deal with it and hold more grudges against him. (unfortunately my oldest remembers the most and that's why she's fot a shi**y relationship with him now) I know you'll never see (since I'm a cheater) but I'm a GREAT mom. I'm my kids everything. And by the way, I have GREAT, smart, responsible, loving kids. However, like I said, their mother taught them to cheat and/or it's ok to cheat! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Darth Vader Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 (edited) Wantingmore......I wanted to let you know something. You are not perfect, you've made a grave mistake by having the affair and you hurt several people, undeserving of that kind of pain.........but many have walked that same road as you, and many have found introspection and light at the end of the tunnel. You are remorseful and you are trying to pick up the pieces of your life and you have the courage to look inside yourself. You are on that journey and don't let some misguided people here bring you down. Also.......I wanted to address one more thing, not being a "cheater" does not make someone a good parent or a good person by default. It just doesn't work like that. I don't know all the details of SO but some things you have posted about give me cause to doubt him getting parent of the year award and from what you've posted, your SO was not parent of the year before the affair, so don't let this projection crap get to you. Also.........for all those people who think a non cheater parent qualifies them for the saint of the year award..........just because they didn't cheat, well screw that, it does not. Many people who haven't cheated have just as many and sometimes more issues that create damage in their children. Unresolved hate and projection from their own childhood is one such issue. Correction! Affairs are NOT a mistake! They are Intentional! You can't trip, fall and accidentally have sex/affair with someone else! BTW, These aren't attacks from me, it's the truth! Edited February 17, 2013 by Darth Vader 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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