whichwayisup Posted January 20, 2013 Share Posted January 20, 2013 All of you were correct...all of you. He's a sociopath. I read about it online and everything fits. And he's been lying to me all week too. I went to Facebook and his wife's profile is now unlocked (hmmm...I wonder why I couldn't view it before). Clearly he's talking out of both sides of his mouth- her page is full of inspirational posts from the past few days. And there's a post from today about the dinner the two of them went on last night. So literally 3 hours after I cried to him on the phone and gave him an ultimatum where he swore to me he wanted to leave her- he went on a date with her. And I bet they held hands and I bet he rubbed her knee while he drove and I bet they went home and had sex and he told her that he was so sorry and that she was the other half of his soul. What a piece of work! That's it, between your tears, get ANGRY! Use that anger to propell you away from him forever. Yes he is living life with his wife. I wouldn't be surprised if you aren't his first affair. Men like that (boy he is groomed and knows how to play a woman like a fiddle) get what they want because they can manipulate and know how to push the right buttons. You didn't do anything wrong so please, don't blame yourself..And most of all, DO NOT let that scumbagshi.tstain ruin you or your self esteem. You are a beautiful person and are too good for him anyway! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lue Posted January 20, 2013 Author Share Posted January 20, 2013 I just feel sick- thinking about the crying and the sleepless nights and the longing I've experienced over the past two weeks. It has literally felt like I have a whole in my chest. And how I haven't been able to sleep in my bed for two weeks because I can feel him in that room so much. And he's been sleeping with her. That's sounds crazy I know because she's his wife and why wouldn't he have sex with her? But I'm so heartbroken I couldn't have sex with anyone right now. And clearly in the past few days, the days where he's been trying to woo me back he's been sleeping with his wife. It makes me feel worthless. Like how can someone go from one person to another like that so indiscriminately??? Because I know what he's like in bed, and he doesn't hang from the rafters. It's all about eye contact and gentleness and whispered words. So he went from whispering words into my hair to whispering them in hers within days- maybe even hours- of us being together??? How can he turn it off and on like that??? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lue Posted January 20, 2013 Author Share Posted January 20, 2013 I realize that question is rhetorical. He can do that because there's something wrong with him Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted January 20, 2013 Share Posted January 20, 2013 I realize that question is rhetorical. He can do that because there's something wrong with him Amen sister! Link to post Share on other sites
FightClub Posted January 20, 2013 Share Posted January 20, 2013 (edited) All of you were correct...all of you. He's a sociopath. I read about it online and everything fits. And he's been lying to me all week too. I went to Facebook and his wife's profile is now unlocked (hmmm...I wonder why I couldn't view it before). Clearly he's talking out of both sides of his mouth- her page is full of inspirational posts from the past few days. And there's a post from today about the dinner the two of them went on last night. So literally 3 hours after I cried to him on the phone and gave him an ultimatum where he swore to me he wanted to leave her- he went on a date with her. And I bet they held hands and I bet he rubbed her knee while he drove and I bet they went home and had sex and he told her that he was so sorry and that she was the other half of his soul. What a piece of work! Hey Lue, I'm a single exOM, although my situation was somewhat different, I knew the exMW was married but something that really hit a memory was what you wrote above. When NC ( No Contact ) was firmly in place, she disappeared through various forms of communication. In the early stages, I did search out of curiosity on the social networks and eventually found a page with her profile picture as a wedding photo between WS and BS, which at the time was a major blow because while in the depths of the affair, I was told there was no real 'love' there anymore. And then the knife really twisted when I found BS social network page, that just like your MM's BS, was unlocked and open to the world. It was there that I saw declarations of affection, them spending time together and even photos from during our online affair from places/experiences I was never told about. After that, that's when I finally told myself no more, truly inside. I fought with it, tried to understand, turned over all the reasons but it wasn't until I faced myself and what was really happening within me did I see that it didn't matter what transpired between them. Deleted and blocked all avenues away from that mess so that I wouldn't have to look back. My life, my choices, my responsibility to own what I knowingly became a part of once and atone for that accordingly. I know that you didn't really see what was happening because everything felt so right but now that your eyes are open, from this point on you are able to make the best choices for yourself. The MM will fade in time, trust me. Until then, don't beat yourself up to much, you took a chance with someone and the gamble didn't pay off, you got hurt. Work through the hurt and use this as a means to go forward and recognize the red flags you couldn't see before, it helped me quite a few times in the last two years with other women that were attached and tried to bring me along for the roller coaster, only this time I was more aware and strong in my convictions to step away from that madness again. In time, this too shall pass, until then keep working at refining the world around you. Best of luck! -FC Edited January 20, 2013 by FightClub 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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