Will he ever want to see his daughter and leave me in the dark?

[hotgurl]

But do you see a problem with me spending the weekend with my mother in law while he's Away? My friend says they've manipulated me into this, why on earth would they? Lol

 

She probably doesn't like you spending time with the MIL. Since MIL covered for your husband while he was cheating on you and she pays his child support allowing him and you to abandon a child.

 

Frankly if I was your friend it wouldn't sit well with me either. Nor would your current behavior. A long term friend probably cares about you and wants the best for you.

 

You keep saying your marriage is better. But is it? Have you done the work to make it better after the affair?

 

Have you been to counseling? Have you talked about why he had an affair in the first place? Have you fixed the problems that were present in the marriage prior to the affair?

 

IS he an open book? Do you have all his passwords and access to his phone, computer, email, fiances? Is he honest with you? IS this his only affair? Did you get checked for STDs?

 

How does he actively show you he is sorry and has changed?

 

Also you need to realize 4 years is a long time. Many people are married after dating for 3 years. This isn't just a run of the mill OW where he just wanted sex this was a serious relationship? Has he admitted that? How have you worked on your marriage?

[Milo12412]

Hi yes we attended counselling for 18 months.... It helped us overcome problems neither of us realised were there.....

 

The major breakdown appeared to be lack of communication, we'd both been so used to just doing our own thing! We both worked, he went to football and out with his friends and I was massively career orientated and not one to enjoy going out, and before we knew it we'd just lost our way..... Drifted.... Hence him seeking solace in another woman's arms..... He doesn't blame this solely, he knows that he doesn't even know why he done it, I do believe him

Tho that he tried to end it numerous times with her and yet couldn't, he couldn't hurt her, couldn't hurt me.... Sad really....

 

Communication is impeccable these days we talk about everything, and not because we have to because we want to we want to understand each other, never want to lose our way again, we now know each others passwords for everything, even our phones, his is left around all day and night..... I genuinely never really worry , our marriage is better than ever, will never be perfect but then whose is? We love and respect each other, now he wants me to go on his nights out, he takes me everywhere, we holiday more than ever, have weekends away..... It's lovely, it actually feels better than when we were first married it's like god has gIven us another chance :-)