Realist3 Posted January 23, 2013 Share Posted January 23, 2013 And to be a bit clearer, your way of putting it about it being a "bummer" because it impacted our plans was never my point, nor was it the way it was intended. That maybe the way it was perceived, and I recognize that. The broader point was that things change and what had been devised previously did require a bit of imagination. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 24, 2013 Share Posted January 24, 2013 The connection is real. The changes being made at our school are a direct result. Why not create another thread and discuss it there, instead of talking about it on someone else's thread that has nothing to do with what happened in Newton. Thanks. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sunflower22 Posted January 27, 2013 Author Share Posted January 27, 2013 Thank you all for your advice and help. At this point he knows I am very suspicious but I am backing off. When he got home from this last trip he was acting very moody agitated and anxious for no reason I could pinpoint. I asked him what was wrong he was just rushing, cursing about any little thing and I said to him hey whats going on with you. You were fine an hour ago at your Lay over and now you seem out of sorts. I told him I haven't seen you in a couple of since yesterday morning and you don't even acknowledge me or ask my how my day is or anything. He got very quiet and then says how was your day almost sarcastic like and I have been upset with him since for treating me this way. In the last year since I had our second child we have had problems. Well he was gone all the time after our baby was born like 4 days a week and I had these two babies and no husband and it was hard on me. We had just moved into a beautiful new home and everything was falling apart. We moved in 1 day before our baby was born. A lot at once and I had a c section. He was looking for a new job one that he traveled less and he got this job. Only it didn't seem less right away. And about a month into the job I found a text between him and a women in the company about a party dress and this and that and I flipped out. I may have been wrong but I was overwhelmed with stress and lonely. I gave him an ultimatum to get a job that had no travel or get a divorce. We have been struggling ever since. We kept going back and forth about divorce. He was so cruel and I was so surprised he'd pick divorce. I mean this man use to adore me. At one point he had his lawyer friend call my house but one night after being bullied for several months I gave him my attorneys number and told him if it's what he wants I'm ready to accommodate. He told me the next morning he couldn't afford to divorce me and that if I wanted to divorce him to go ahead. He hasn't really brought up divorce again but we just aren't the same. And he hides things from me. I know he loves our kids but I dont know that he loves me. He got really crazy over the finances also. He has always been open to counseling but it hasn't helped us. Over Xmas he told me I was the love of his life but I don't believe him. He has hurt me greatly because since I have asked him to quit his job for a job where he can be home he has been very cruel like someone I don't know. He has gotten better over the year but we are not the same together. We can live together cordially but I want my husband back. I want him to be honest with me. I will let him go if that's what he wants. Our kids are both babies and I'm still young enough to possibly have a good life with someone who loves me. Many nights I have laid up crying over him a year with no answers. He has made our marriage since I have given in on the travel piece a dictatorship. I have to be cold to him to be treated decently. The minute I let my guard down and turn loving he's out to hurt me again. He does do A LOT of online gaming. The last game he did on line I played a little. Recently he has stopped playing that. He said because he couldn't get anywhere on it. Now he is playing some other game that he says is not on line. I will pay more attention to that. Jesus wouldn't just being honest be easier. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted January 27, 2013 Share Posted January 27, 2013 Can you track his computer and phone? You need to find out what he's up to... It's not looking good and you shouldn't put up with him being an azzhat to you! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sunflower22 Posted January 27, 2013 Author Share Posted January 27, 2013 No I can't trace either. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sunflower22 Posted January 27, 2013 Author Share Posted January 27, 2013 He seems to go back and forth. At Xmas time he didn't travel for 2 months and he told me he wanted to work on things with us but then out of the blue he will treat me like crap and start being a jerk again. So I go from making myself cold toward him to opening up to getting hurt and being cold again. Each time I get cold he seems to be nicer. It's so strange. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted January 27, 2013 Share Posted January 27, 2013 Voice recorder then. Put it in his work area and send one in his bag too when he travels. Link to post Share on other sites
egalew Posted January 27, 2013 Share Posted January 27, 2013 If you suspect, he is probably cheating. I get hit on by married men all the time. So, much so that I do searches now before accepting a date. Often they are the "nicest guys" and "family men" who are doing the hitting on. As for me and my exOM, we saw / and talked to each other a lot. Daily, in fact. Link to post Share on other sites
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