Therapy

[CarboniteCammy]

So, maybe some of you know, some of you don't, but I had my first therapy appointment last night. It was mostly background information and why I felt like I needed therapy etc.

 

But, in the middle of the appointment, my therapist said that she just found out that she had stage 1 breast cancer. We had just gotten done talking about our kids. I guess she's going to start chemo this week.

 

I don't know what's normal in therapy and what's not. But, now I feel like all of my problems are insignificant compared to what she's going through and I would feel...guilty? Selfish? unloading my issues on her.

 

I get that therapists are people too, and all I could think about was what she was going to do, being the mom of a four year old and an eight year old and trying to work while going through chemo, and while she didn't mention it, she didn't have a wedding band on, and I thought it would be awful to go through all that as a single mom on top of everything else.

 

I don't know what to do. Should I find another therapist? What are your thoughts?

[will1988]

I know this is going to sound a little shallow... but you should get a new therapist. I mean if the shrink is talking about their own problems during a session then that is taking away from why you are going there in the first place... to get your issues fixed. I mean it is a very sad thing that is happening to her, but on your first visit you don't need to hear that and feel guilty. Get a new head shrinker.

[Ladybugz]

I think she should have told you before asking you all of that.

But i think she maybe started so she can continue when she gets better.

 

But its about you now, and she have her own family etc. who will take care of her.

 

You should get another therapist. cause you dont know how long her situation will take, its not a little thing.

[jwi71]

So, maybe some of you know, some of you don't, but I had my first therapy appointment last night. It was mostly background information and why I felt like I needed therapy etc.

 

But, in the middle of the appointment, my therapist said that she just found out that she had stage 1 breast cancer. We had just gotten done talking about our kids. I guess she's going to start chemo this week.

 

I don't know what's normal in therapy and what's not. But, now I feel like all of my problems are insignificant compared to what she's going through and I would feel...guilty? Selfish? unloading my issues on her.

 

I get that therapists are people too, and all I could think about was what she was going to do, being the mom of a four year old and an eight year old and trying to work while going through chemo, and while she didn't mention it, she didn't have a wedding band on, and I thought it would be awful to go through all that as a single mom on top of everything else.

 

I don't know what to do. Should I find another therapist? What are your thoughts?

 

Go to your second appointment or perhaps call her.

 

If she were not going to be in a position to effectively do her job I would hope she would be aware enough to actually not take new clients. Yet she took you.

 

So I would ask point blank "Is your upcoming chemo going to be a detriment to your ability to help me? Is it going to force us to miss or delay sessions?"

 

Voice your concerns - they ARE valid.

 

But your IC also deserves the ability to "defend" her taking you on.

[will1988]

Go to your second appointment or perhaps call her.

 

If she were not going to be in a position to effectively do her job I would hope she would be aware enough to actually not take new clients. Yet she took you.

 

So I would ask point blank "Is your upcoming chemo going to be a detriment to your ability to help me? Is it going to force us to miss or delay sessions?"

 

Voice your concerns - they ARE valid.

 

But your IC also deserves the ability to "defend" her taking you on.

 

Yes, but at the same time that could come off as rude. Plus the OP shouldn't have to be put in a situation where they have to ask their shrink if they are in a position to actually give sound advice! The OP has his/her (I forgot what gender. sorry) own issues to worry about, why should they have to worry about their shrinks issues? That worry would impact his/her sessions with the shrink. So OP your best bet is to start fresh with a new shrink.