tryingveryhard Posted August 25, 2004 Share Posted August 25, 2004 Hi everyone, I hope someone can help me shed some light on my relationship. I'ts been really hard and i don't think the whole breakup has completly set in yet. I have so many different thoughts going through my head and i think its very doubtful we will get back together. FYI, We were together for 4.5 years, We met and moved into together 1 week later, no ****. I was 19 and she was 18. We also just had a baby three months ago (its not post paternity anything she says). Everything went really good for while, we were very happy and in love. We had plans for the future and hopes and dreams for the rest of our lives. Then the fights got worse. It seemed the worse the fights got the more we pulled eachother in more. I always wanted to make her happy and I always thought whatever i tried to do to make her happy would be good enough. I think she tried to do the same thing. Well the last time she left, she told me to get a job and she will come home. Now its been three weeks and she has told me to go on with my life. It was a shock to the system. Everything changed. Everytime i showed her how much i was willing to change for her, the farther she got. I'm at the point now where im trying to be so good to her because ultimetly I F*cked up and i know i did. I was (in a mild sense) controlling, verbal abusive, and not letting herself or myself grow anymore. Right now, i don't think she is attractted to me at all. She can get a more attractive guy then me, to date her, even with a baby i think (that would ****in hurt). My questions: - Since i screwed the relationship up by not having a job and being a heartless jackass; how can i get her back after this? - Can a girl lose her love for a guy, emotionally and physically, and not get it back? - why do i always try to make things up with her when she leaves me?????? am i just the stpidist guy around or what... - I need my new born son and the love of my life back. Thank-you and any advice or personal experiences would greatly be appreciated. Link to post Share on other sites
Breathe Posted August 25, 2004 Share Posted August 25, 2004 Don't give up. Show her with your actions that you realize that you have done wrong and you are taking the steps to change for the better. Sometimes it's not what you say, but what you do that makes all the difference. Link to post Share on other sites
pixie2004 Posted August 25, 2004 Share Posted August 25, 2004 Well she made a promise to come back when you get a job... I think she just did something drastic in order for you to see how much it means to her when you are less independent and get a job. I think the message is clear - GET A JOB Don't even try and persuade her to come back before you get a job - you should be ashamed. *sorry* don't mean to be harsh - but this is the real world! You've got responsibilities - a girl and baby to look after. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tryingveryhard Posted December 7, 2004 Author Share Posted December 7, 2004 hello all, I have an update for you. well, its december now and I've been back together with my ex again for about three weeks. she moved back in with me three weeks ago. i got a job and everything and showed i really wanted her back and my to raise my son with her. it has been really hard up until now. at the end of september, she came back to me for about a week and we were like old times but didnt move in that time. she ended up blowing me off again. then she served me papers for a court appearence after that for our son. all october looked very grim for our relationship; it was really wierd. she told me about her bofriends, would act like a totally different person and get ready for dates at my house. it was really depressing and wierd. she would say things to me like i dont deserve to be a father and she waiting for me to "F" up, it was really hard and rocked my heart. then she started to want to hang out all the time and call me alot around the beggining of november. I got my house going good, with a phone and furniture and my job was going really good. when we would hang out with our son, we would have a really good time. we would get alittle high together, smoking alittle weed and screw like animals (excuse the valgurness). she started telling me personal stuff. she told me she was very lonely and she had slept with a guy and fooled around with another. i found out my ex and current girlfriend is kindov a slut and fooled around with 4 guys during our 3 month break-up. i also found out she might have just come back to me because im the best she has for right now (i really hope not). also, she is a cronic dope smoker and can smoke all the weed she wants with me because she isnt living with her parents anymore. I'ts really hard. is there anyway i can find out her true intentions? i guess i will never know. i have to just stay on my own course and hope we can be happy together. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tryingveryhard Posted December 7, 2004 Author Share Posted December 7, 2004 one more thing, her family stood in between us getting back together and made it alot harder for her to come home. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted December 7, 2004 Share Posted December 7, 2004 I hope you're getting tested for STDs. She sounds like a troubled lady. I suspect you're in for more of the same if you continue with her. Can a girl lose her love for a guy, emotionally and physically, and not get it back? Absolutely. I suspect she has, unfortunately. Link to post Share on other sites
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