I picked my boyfriend over my friends

[jnb637]

My situation dates back to about 2 years. Through High School my group of friends were so close. All we needed was each other and didn't really let anyone else in. Our memories are amazing!! Years later I was engaged to a guy in our group and my best friend girl was engaged to another guy from our group. We had all been best friends for over 5 years and we had been with our fiances for 4 of the 5 years. We turned 21 and decided (us girls) that we wanted to do our own thing. We didn't really know anything else...

 

Things got very complicated. We broke off our engagements and things kept getting more and more out of hand. She ended up getting back with her ex-fiance but I did not want to go back to mine which caused even larger complications. Long story short I met another guy started dating him and everyone in my circle of friends dis-owned me. My boyfriend hates them so much it is kind of scary.

 

About a year after I cut off ties with my friends my boyfriend started acting crazy. He doesn't trust me at all (I have NEVER given him a reason not to). I checks my cell phone constantly, I have to provide him with receipts to prove where I was and when I was there. When he is at work and I am not I am expected to be there with him. I am not allowed to go out without him. I don't even have any friends left to go out with.

 

That is about 30% of the time. The other % of time our relationship is amazing. We love each other and have an awesome time together. We could just stay home all day and all night and talk and laugh. When things are good they are amazing. He treats me like a princess and would do anything for me.

 

Sometimes I miss my friends! I talk to them behind his back but only on instant messanger I would never risk him catching me. They still beg me to leave him. SO much has happened thought, I don't think things will be the same. She asked me to be her maid of honor like we talked about for years and I said no b/c he wouldn't let me go (things like that).

 

I don't know what to do!! Should I give up my boyfriend and hope my friends forgive me or should I cut my losses and concentrate on the love of my life?

[Firegirl04]

GET RID OF HIM!!! Most of the time, when they are accusing you of doing something wrong its because they are doing it.

[red-rose-in-winter]

I agree: DUMP HIM!!!

 

Why should you have to give receipts about where you have been during the day? That is just ridiculous!!! You said that when he is at work and you are not, you have to be there with him. Do you work at the same company? I have heard of guys making their wives or girlfriend sit in the car in the parking lot while they are at work.

 

It sounds like he is very controlling. Every relationship needs some breathing room. Why is he so opposed to you talking to your friends or going out with them once in a while? Does he talk to his friends and go out with them?

 

I know how it is to have really close friends. It's almost like all the people in the group fit together like a puzzle ~ almost like an extended family. But your friends shouldn't have dis-owned you just because you didn't want to get back with your ex-fiancee. You had to do what was right FOR YOU!!! But they are right when they say you should dump him ~ you shouldn't have to explain where you've been every second of the day and go behind his back to talk to your friends.

 

And if you want to be maid of honor in your friend's wedding, DO IT!!! He doesn't OWN you!!! You are your own woman!!! If he doesn't like it....TOO BAD!!!

[jnb637]

Thank you for answering me. I knew that is what people would say and think but I really needed to hear it from non-biased parties. Things are just complicated but I guess that's life. I think I would just walk away but my boyfriend and I have ties... We live together, we bought all of our furniture and things in the house together, and he has bad credit and we have quite a bit of credit built up on my name. I feel like I am getting divorced. Has anyone been through a break up like that? When alot of money (in debt) is owed??