chucksagent Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 I am best man in a wedding coming up. Several of my other friends will also be in the grooms party. This guy refused to cut corners ANYWHERE. His hotel rooms are $250.00 a night. All only have 1 bed and no couch - none are suites. So for 2 nights, it will cost us $500.00 (plus taxes and hidden fees). He lives away from all of us....so we ALL need to drive. So gas money....Probably $100.00 roughly. The amount of money we will all put in our individual cards for the wedding; $100.00 minimum probably. He wants us to come up late Thursday or early Friday for Saturday wedding. So breakfast, lunch, dinner all days except for dinner on Friday (Rehearsal) and Saturday. He wasn't happy with our first bachelor party for him even though it was an all day affair and really cool. He wanted to go out of town somewhere - so now he is saying he wants a second bachelor party 2 days before the wedding. And yesterday, he finally delivered the death blow. He sent out an email telling us about our tux rentals. He chose the MOST expensive Tux they had, at $200.00 for a tuxedo rental. Majority of brides maids dresses are cheaper and you KEEP them. This is merely a rental for a TUX. And the tux, alas, looks more like a suit than a tux ironically. Lol. His though, looks like a James Bond tux and looks awesome. We all love this guy and wants him to be happy, but none of us work on wall street or are rich. I am better off than just about every other guy in the wedding party, so if I am noticing, it's gotta be killer for them. Today, I get to work, and they ALL privately emailed me aside from him and were like "What is he doing...he is killing us!" A few have even entertained dropping out and I think 1 is. Where does everyone stand on this? Is the groom being a groomzilla? Are we being bad friends? Based on the above estimation, we are dropping no less than $1000.00 on this. Not even counting the second bachelor party he is demanding, and fee's we haven't thought of that aren't obvious. And stuff is ALWAYS more expensive than you think. Link to post Share on other sites
WhatYouWantToHear Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 Is the groom being a groomzilla? Are we being bad friends? Yes. If you can't tell your "friend" he's being a prissy douchebag and to cool it, then you are not his friend. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SensitiveTJ Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 I am best man in a wedding coming up. Several of my other friends will also be in the grooms party. This guy refused to cut corners ANYWHERE. His hotel rooms are $250.00 a night. All only have 1 bed and no couch - none are suites. So for 2 nights, it will cost us $500.00 (plus taxes and hidden fees). He lives away from all of us....so we ALL need to drive. So gas money....Probably $100.00 roughly. The amount of money we will all put in our individual cards for the wedding; $100.00 minimum probably. He wants us to come up late Thursday or early Friday for Saturday wedding. So breakfast, lunch, dinner all days except for dinner on Friday (Rehearsal) and Saturday. He wasn't happy with our first bachelor party for him even though it was an all day affair and really cool. He wanted to go out of town somewhere - so now he is saying he wants a second bachelor party 2 days before the wedding. And yesterday, he finally delivered the death blow. He sent out an email telling us about our tux rentals. He chose the MOST expensive Tux they had, at $200.00 for a tuxedo rental. Majority of brides maids dresses are cheaper and you KEEP them. This is merely a rental for a TUX. And the tux, alas, looks more like a suit than a tux ironically. Lol. His though, looks like a James Bond tux and looks awesome. We all love this guy and wants him to be happy, but none of us work on wall street or are rich. I am better off than just about every other guy in the wedding party, so if I am noticing, it's gotta be killer for them. Today, I get to work, and they ALL privately emailed me aside from him and were like "What is he doing...he is killing us!" A few have even entertained dropping out and I think 1 is. Where does everyone stand on this? Is the groom being a groomzilla? Are we being bad friends? Based on the above estimation, we are dropping no less than $1000.00 on this. Not even counting the second bachelor party he is demanding, and fee's we haven't thought of that aren't obvious. And stuff is ALWAYS more expensive than you think. Honestly, your friend sounds like a jerk. Who would have the nerve to demand a second bachelor party? I would speak to him about this whole affair. It seems like he's running up the price tag on purpose, which is pretty weird. I think you should let hik know the bill is becoming excessive. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 Only way I can see his behaviour being acceptable is if he's paying for it. Otherwise, majorly selfish friend. I'd take him aside and talk to him, give him one chance to make it right. If he refuses to compromise, you're totally within your rights to bail. I am curious though - if you're the best man, he must have been a good friend for a long time, right? How have you not noticed his douchiness before? 4 Link to post Share on other sites
TigerCub Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 I agree with those that suggested to talk to the groom. I think that's what a best man is for - to handle the groom and help with the planning. I'm the maid of honor for my close friend's wedding and if she was pulling that kind of crap, I would tell her when enough is enough and I would tell her that not everyone is going to break the bank to be there - that although ,yes she's great and it is her special day, it's still not fair or even nice to put so many people out because of it. So either help them with their expenses or take it down a notch. If you're the best man - you should have that talk with him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
serial muse Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 WOW. That is crazypants. I agree with Elswyth, give him the opportunity to know how you're all feeling and to respond to it. It seems they want you to be the spokesman, which is appropriate, since you are the best man. Does your experience of him suggest that he'll be open to listening? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Realist3 Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 Who demands a bachelor party, much less a second one? What about staying at a different/cheaper hotel? Perhaps room together? As his best man you should tell him what the feelings are from the rest of the group. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author chucksagent Posted February 11, 2013 Author Share Posted February 11, 2013 Proud to report...your advice was all VERY good...I spoke to him, told him $200.00 was on the VERY high end for tux's...He claimed ignorance (which I believe him, he isn't modest, if he thought he was right he would have fought me)....Says the girl just acted like it was their normal popular one...aka he was duped.... As SOON as I told him, he left work and WENT RIGHT BACK to the store, and got the $100.00 tuxedos. Big win!!! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
SensitiveTJ Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 Proud to report...your advice was all VERY good...I spoke to him, told him $200.00 was on the VERY high end for tux's...He claimed ignorance (which I believe him, he isn't modest, if he thought he was right he would have fought me)....Says the girl just acted like it was their normal popular one...aka he was duped.... As SOON as I told him, he left work and WENT RIGHT BACK to the store, and got the $100.00 tuxedos. Big win!!! That's good news. What about some of the other expenses? Is he still insistent on solo hotel rooms and a 2nd bachelor party? Link to post Share on other sites
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