jdoe191969 Posted February 9, 2013 Share Posted February 9, 2013 If I had to guess, I'd say jealousy but I've never felt it before so it is new to me. My girlfriend texts with her ex-husband daily. They have kids but 50% of the texts have nothing to do with kids. I've spoken to her about it and she has promised not to do it anymore -- to only communicate about the kids. They still constantly discuss music, movies, etc. I wish I could just ignore it and not allow it to make me upset. Since we last spoke about this, I have kept my emotions to myself and regardless of how bad it made me feel, I still kept quiet. I know that I'm an ass for feeling this way. It is selfish but the thing is...they are NOT good parents and have never been. Their constant communication about random stuff doesn't help the kids. I don't know what to do but I am constantly feeling as if I am in the wrong...yet I cannot help but feel the way I do. Advice? Thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted February 9, 2013 Share Posted February 9, 2013 You are not an ass for feeling these feelings. Your girlfriend is disrespecting you and your relationship. Based on what you said she seems to have an emotional relationship going on with her ex. If the roles were reversed I doubt that she would be forgiving and accepting as you have been. For many men this could be a deal-breaker for their relationship. The fact that she continues to text with him about personal things that has nothing to do with the children against your wishes, then she is sending a clear message to you that you are not her number one priority. Why would you wish to remain in a relationship if you are not her top priority compared to the ex? Link to post Share on other sites
GSB81 Posted February 11, 2013 Share Posted February 11, 2013 I honestly think jealousy, TO AN EXTENT, is normal. In situations like this, it's merely a reaction to something being not quite right. Notice the situations described in this forum. The threads that focus on jealousy tend to read like this one, or someone's spouse has been befriended by someone of the opposite sex and they are getting a bit too close for comfort. I was once in a relationship with a woman who's father was dying from cancer. She's a nurse so she was able to take great care of him. This resulted in us not getting to spend a lot of time together. I was not her number one priority and I was okay with that. I've also dated women with children who are great mothers who put their children first as they should. Again, I was not a top priority and I was ok with it. Never did jealousy rear its ugly head. Jealousy, for me and I'm sure others can relate, only becomes an issue when a girl I'm with starts focusing a lot of her time and attention on another guy. Especially if that guy is an ex. Too often jealousy is discounted as a invalid emotion. Yes it can be toxic to a relationship, but sometimes the bigger issue is what is triggering it.. This is especially true in cases such as the OP's, where it appears to be knew to him. He didn't wake up one day and decide to become jealous, he is merely reacting to the behavior of his girlfriend. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
loversquarrel Posted February 11, 2013 Share Posted February 11, 2013 You should ask her why the phukk they got divorced in the first place? Seems they get along just fine. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GSB81 Posted February 11, 2013 Share Posted February 11, 2013 You should ask her why the phukk they got divorced in the first place? Seems they get along just fine. I bet she'd give him the classic "we make better friends than husband and wife" crap. Link to post Share on other sites
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