If its meant to be they will come back to you.

[djones]

Hey Guys,

 

I am up again its 2:33 am here I did not get a call from her...I sent her the e-mail reply like wantans4 said, but she did not reply to it, so I dont know if she got it and/or she was just too busy to call me last night...so I dont know if she was going to call me last night.. I guess I will wait and see if she sends me an e-mail today. I did not get my hopes up too high that she would call but just a little but not to the level I would have just after the breakup in the begining, so I guess thats a good thing.....but I dont know why I still wake up in the middle of the night...well I guess I know that....I still miss her and love her....take care guys...i 'll read all your posts in the morning...i am going to try to get some sleep...take care

[Papillon]

300 posts! Woooohooooo!

[kodiak]

Hey Everybody-

 

Well much like drjones i am up too at this late hour. Its become a ritual for me, go to bed really late and wake up late as well. I cant really say that it has alot to do with my ex because I have always been kind of a night owl i guess. Anyways I went out tonight with a couple of buddies and I really missed her. I mean I was at a bar seeing alot of couples and all i wanted to do was go back in time so I could be with my ex. I got hit on by alot of girls tonight too but it just doesnt matter to me right now. They will be talking to me and I just sit there and think about her. Im just so tired of feeling this way everyday guys!!!! Why is it so hard with this one, why???? You know i would have never thought of joining a forum liek this when I broke of with my ex ex. It just did not bother me as much. Sure I missed her and wanted her back at first but it only lasted a month at the most. It was a little over a month when I met my most recent ex and fell so madly inlove with her. She was the first one to say "I LOVE YOU" but when i think back I probably wanted to say it alot earlier. That used to be a running joke with us because she always told me that I fell inlove with her first. I havnt sent her any kind of text for about a week or so and I feel pretty good about it. Sure I hope that she calls soon to check in but im not sure if I will talk to her. Maybe our last talk two weeks ago was our last, who knows???? For those who dont know there was alot of unsettled things that i wanted to tell her that I never got a chance to over the phone. So I wrote a letter but I never sent it. I still have it in my desk drawer and who knows what I will do with it. Im not sure if there is a future for us and each day that goes by, ithe odds get slimer and slimer. However next month is her bday and I think that i will mail her a birthday card and the letter. The letter is nothing chessy at all and I dont beg or plead. ITs just a simple letter telling her the stuff that I need to get off my chest. What do you all think about that? Anyways i hope everybody else is doing ok. Each day that goes by I liek to think that it gets easier. Im not sure if I beleive that but I try to think that way. I look at it as if each day either my ex will get closer to coming back or I will get closer too moving on and forgetting about her. Take Care everybody. Im going to try to get some sleep and hope I dont have to much of a hangover in the morning. Too many beers tonight..................Kodiak.

 

 

drjones- dont worry that you havnt got a call yet. Dont read too much into i either. There is a reason that my ex never called about the card and there is a reason that your ex hasnt called you yet. Dont worry my brother. ALso i couldnt post those lyrics to that song but you have to try to listen to it. It will help you, I promise. Songs are very ironic. Our song used to be "here without you" by three doors down. Its about a long distance relationship that goes bad. How ironic is that???? I still listen to that song everyday though

[WantanS4]

Thinking more about my last post.....

 

It's only abuse... it seems... if it's a constant everyday type of thing. It wasn't in my case. It was only when she would throw things in my face about how I felt on certain things....... then I had to get vicious and say something worse because it would hurt...... and we got into the cycle.... and well... I guess i would always win... that is be more vicious.

 

But she always did the silent treatment whne it came to her..... she never spoke.... and well.... it's hard to trust someone who doesn't tell you how the feel... let alone really feel...........

 

Hmm.... coming to terms with things........... hmmmm

 

 

As far as mj108 and not going out.................. I haven't been attracted to a women (like I was to my ex).... ever since the breakup......... it's like i've lost all sexual desire.......... and I don't think it's coming back............. now i look at beautiful women... and think "hmmm... I wonder what her story(life) is all about........ I wonder what she thinks about this... I wonder what she thinks about that....... hmmm......." whereas before it was "Wow...... I wonder what she kisses like.... I wonder what she tastes like....... hmmm......."

 

hhahaha... maybe I shoulda told you all that...... ahhahaah........ but seriously... has anyone else experienced that?

[djones]

Hey kodiak,

 

Thanks....yeah I will wait and see what happens....yeah I have to look for the lyrics...I am now listening to Sting Fields of gold....and the 1st song I forgot some of the lyrics and I just broke down and made me miss her so much...its like how I am feeling for her right now...I know its cheesy but its how I feel for her....which was weird...the songs titlie "when we dance"....there is a proposal line I always said when I meet the right girl I would say to her if that ever happens to me....

 

here read the lyrics, I know some of it is intence but ,I just think about her when I hear it:

 

If he loved you

Like I love you

I would walk away in shame

I'd move town

I'd change my name

 

When he watches you

When he counts to buy your soul

On your hand his golden rings

Like he owns a bird that sings

 

When we dance, angels will run and hide their wings

 

The priest has said my soul's salvation

Is in the balance of the angels

And underneath the wheels of passion

I keep the faith in my fashion

When we dance, angels will run and hide their wings

 

I'm still in love with you

[i'm gonna find a place to live

Give you all I've got to give]

When we dance, angels will run and hide their wings

When we dance, angels will run and hide their wings

 

If I could break down these walls

And shout my name at heaven's gate

I'd take these hands

And I'd destroy the dark machineries of fate

Cathedrals are broken

Heaven's no longer above

And hellfire's a promise away

I'd still be saying

I'm still in love

 

He won't love you

Like I love you

He won't care for you this way

He'll mistreat you if you stay

 

Come and live with me

We'll have children of our own

I would love you more than life

If you'll come and be my wife

When we dance, angels will run and hide their wings

When we dance, angels will run and hide their wings

When we dance, angels will run and hide their wings

When we dance, angels will run and hide their wings

 

I'm gonna love you more than life

If you will only be my wife

I'm gonna love you more than life

If you will only be my wife

I'm gonna love you night and day

I'm gonna try in every way

 

(I had a dream last night

I dreamt you were by my side

Walking with me baby

My heart was filled with pride

I had a dream last night)

 

Well theres my song to add to the group...take care guys

Kodiak, she got to call you....yeah the letter I think you should send it, but maybe ask the girls MJ108 or atlous here can give you a better idea if you should send the letter....take care

[djones]

Hey Wantans4,

 

I know what you mean, I have no interest in women right now, I mean you see hot women all round and I just dont care anymore....Its like I am just an observer and taking up in all the sites....I just keep comming back to her and how I miss her....and the empty feeling i get inside comes rushing in.....and I dont want to go through that with someone again....when you get burned somany times you tend to grow a thick skin and I have have a huge one now

[mj108]

Kodiak---If you send the card with the letter---remember she didn't respond to the other card. If she didn't respond to the other card, do you think she would respond to her b-day card? I think when she calls you---you should read the letter to her so you'll know then she would have to respond. Just an idea. Then see how she responds to the letter & you'll have your answer about sending her a b-day card.

 

I know how you feel when people approach you & the only person you're thinking of is your ex. It happens to me all the time. Guys come up to me constantly & I won't give them a chance...I mean, I'll talk to them but I have my mind fully on my ex. That's when I get mad at myself because there have been some great guys that I've talked to. I guess, we just have to heal first & then we can move on.

 

I think I'm looking for the feeling I had when I first met my ex. When him and I first met----it was like BAM---magnetic---magical---the feeling. He even said the same thing. We were instantly connected & still have the feeling after 2 1/2 years. It never went away. You know how some people always say that the 'feeling' isn't that strong anymore (after years?). Well, our connection got stronger. That's why Him and I figured we are soulmates. I could look into his eyes & know what he was feeling & vice/versa. I would finish his sentences & he would finish mine. Took me 31 years to experience this feeling...& even if him and I never get back together---I thank God to had experience it. So--I think maybe I'm searching for the next guy....& that feeling again, but it's not happening. Maybe I'm asking too much?

 

Hang in there Kodiak---she will call. Just don't go on a 2 week drunk like I did...it didn't help.

 

Backspun----I'm so glad everything is working out for you! Keep us updated & I hope you have fun on Friday.

 

drjones---I know how it is to wake up during the night. I do that all the time. It sucks waking up & missing them. Then you have the dreams & the dreams are so good you don't want to wake up---you want to be in the dream with the one you love. Hopefully, all these dreams will fade away in time.

 

Oh---and about the anxiety attacks, are you still having them? I use to have them a few years back...& I may can give you some info on them. You can have an anxiety attack throughout the night so maybe that's what your experiencing too?

 

WantanS4---- You know you can tell me anything. ha When I look at guys I think their going to hurt me. I just see hurt & pain. I use to look at guys & think---wow he's cute---look at that fine looking....well, you know....ha Now I look at them & think of my ex & think every guy is out to hurt me (just being honest). I know it's not true...just a stage I'm going through I suppose.

 

Everyone, stay strong & positive! I've posted some songs below that have been helping me---variety of songs.

 

"My happy ending" Avril Lavigne

"You'll think of me" Keith Urban

"Are you happy now?" Michelle Branch

"Burn" Usher

"Break down here" Julie Roberts

 

Talk to you guys later. Oh---and one question for all of you. A guy friend that I haven't seen in 4 years called me yesterday. Him and I have been friends for 15 years. I guess you could say---most of my friends are guys. Anyway, him and I never hooked up or anything & he wants me to come over his house on Sunday & watch football game (which I love!). In a way---I want to go...but I don't know if I should, because knowing my luck I'll think about my ex & not have a good time. Should I go?

[djones]

Mj108,

 

I say you should go....

 

Guys, you all know I sent her the e-mail and I thought she would call last night but she did not, she did not say that she would....just a question how long should I wait before I e-mail her again, if she does not contact me....I am just wondering, I dont know I thinking something happend to her i just want to see that she's ok, maybe its just me....should I e-mail her again...or just stay cool?

[LexiB]

MJ how can you listen to Burn? After 4 months that song still brings tears to my eyes. (sigh...). You know its so crazy. I remember one day my ex and I were coming out of the subway and someone was playing that song in their car. I jokingly said "Aw, that song is so sad--if we ever breakup that can be OUR song". Guess what--now it IS (he said pretty much the same stuff mentioned--"there's so many other things I gotta deal with", he loves me but has to let it go, blah,blah,blah...)!!! Lol. Life sucks sometimes, what are you gonna do?

 

It's been a while since I posted on this site, but I have been keeping up w/ reading everyone's updates.

 

Guys (and my fellow ladies) hang in there!!as much as it still hurts even after all this time, it is getting better, isnt it? Any sign of improvement is better than none at all. I still have my times when I'll get a flashback of something we did together (even stupid little things like standing on the never-ending line at Coldstone Creamery or how he always stood behind me and gae me backrubs whenever we got on an escalator...). Yes, some f those thoughts are hard not to be affected by and I do still have crying marathons every so often. But (believe it or not, lol) I really do feel alot better than I did June 20th.

 

My situation is a little different from most on this thread. My ex and I have mutually decided to work on our friendship. In earlier post I said I was avoiding contact with him despite the fact that he still wanted us to be friends. I did for over two weeks but during that time it seemed like he was on my mind even more b/c I had to use so much energy NOt to call him or return his messages. He knows i still have a grudge against him for the way he went about ending things but he's apologized and were slooooooowwwwwwwlllllllyyyyyyy working on it. (we havent made plands to hang out any time soon).

 

Guys try not to get so distraught about not talking to your ex alot right now. I can tell you, that even if you talk to them everyday, unless they're saying the things your heart wants them to, ie-- "I ws such an idiot for even thinking I cld live without you...ur my world and my life--wanna get married???" (At least thats my hope, anyway, lol)

--its still going to be incredibly difficult.

 

I am grateful that we still want to be aprt of each other's lives but its just soooooo hard seeing that its not anything thing like it was four months ago. Before I had to force him to get off the phone with me at night b/c he has to wake up at 500am for work, now he tells me when he has to go to sleep and no longer protests in the slightest when I say I have to get off the phone. Its all the little things that hurt so much. Feeling that hes soooo close, but so very far...all these scanarios I keep playing in my head of when we finally do hang out again and how things would happen f we did reconcile seem so real that I even get lost in them at times but then I realize how far anything like that is from coming close to happening--if it would at all...

 

Like I said lets hang tough--what ever happens with these crazy ppl who mysteriously got us to fall in love with them. Lets look at it this way, there really is no where left for our emotions to go but up--right?

[WantanS4]

drjones,

 

JUST WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Slow down...... let it simmer for a while......... worst case scenario, she won't reply or call...... meaning......... that IF SHE DOES EVENTUALLY REPLY... you'll know it's only to ***** with you..... and play with your mind.... You don't need that... adn you SHOULDN"T want it!!!

 

Let her do her thing...... one day...... she'll be beggin you for another chance....... play it cool for now.

[mj108]

dr. jones---I agree with WantanS4----wait it out. Don't reply yet. Wait a few days to see what happens.

 

PS---I think I will go watch the football game with my buddy!

 

LexiB---Yeah that song is sad. It helps me though---my emotions are so haywire that I'm sad one minute & angry the next. So, I was posting sad & angry songs. lol Since I don't know what emotion is going to hit me next.

 

So...June 20th--that's when ya'll ended? We ended just 2 weeks ago...I hope a few months down the road maybe I can build a friendship with him like you have with your ex. Him and I will always bump into eachother because his friends are my friends. The last time I spoke to him (2 weeks ago)...I was hurt & told him so (very calmly). I told him how I felt & he told me "Please don't hate me...I thought we would always forever be friends no matter what happens." I didn't know what to say then. I felt so numb---in pain. We didn't finish our conversation but I have been getting a lot of hang-ups & private no.s I do miss him a lot....but I am trying to be strong. One question: Why did you & your ex break up? Just wondering. I hope I can be friends with my ex one day. Right now there is a lot of pain & I feel as if I was to call him right now...I would hurt even more. Make sense?

 

Thank you for your post. It really helps.

[Hurt]

Great advice!! I have been thru the pain and still in it, but it is softer now, no one to blame, the has been rung and it will never unring! What ever was done is done as of a moment ago.

[LexiB]

Yeah MJ what u feel makes perfect sense. I felt the same way which is why I originally told him I couldnt talk to him anymore for a while until I felt I could hang up with him and not start a flood immediately afterwards--or at least be able to control myself if I did (unfortunately Im only at the latter stage right now but its getting better .

 

When we broke up he was in a really bad place--sort of a mini depression. He said he didnt feel like he knew how to make me happy anymore, that we were too different and he couldnt have a girlfriend until he figured it all out, etc. He was being honest, I knew he wasnt cheating on me or anything like that but it was soooo stinkin frustrating. No matter what I said he wouldnt change his mind. Didnt want my help--to work thru it together b/c he felt it was something he had to do on his own. (sigh). The first two weeks were HORRIBLE. I of course cldnt just let go that easily (we broke up over the phone ) and kept trying to persuade him, talk to him, get answers, anything. I guess I was in shock bc he went from being so affectionate and loving towards me to seeming to not have a problem whatsoever with being away from me. He was just so rude and harsh to me abt everthing. I mean I know I was persistant but my God, we had just broken up he cldve shown some sorta compassion....errr, makes me bitter just thinkin abt it, lol. I can laugh abt it know bc he has acknowledged how terrible he was and apologised saying he had treadted everyone that way during that time. I guess that makes some kind of sense...

 

Hes doing alot better now but no sign of reconciliation. Weve both been casually dating other ppl and been upfront abt it, nothing serious. I dont know. This is all so crazy! whats up with this???

 

I need a vaction Actually I think we all do---Fiji anyone?

[kodiak]

Hey Everybody-

 

Hows it going with you all today? Im kinda am having a very sad day. I dont know why I guess its jsut missing her. Its so weird how everything that you do in your daily routine you can relate to something about your ex. I just ate a lunch with a buddy at a place that reminded me of her. Last time i ate there I remember her calling to just tell me that she loves me. After I started thinking about that I got very sad and had a hard tiem finishing my lunch. I get so anxious and worked up that I get nausea. Its been four almost four months and I still feel so ****ty at times. I beggining to think that maybe there is something wrong with my emotions mentally. I dont know. What do you guys think? You can be honest. I truly think that this girl was my soulmate and I just am not hers obviously. Anyways i have to go run some errands right now. Drjones how are you doing today? HAs anyone heard from dugs? Hows everybody else doing today? Mj, go watch the game. Force yourself to have fun and try your best not to think about him. I know that its hard, beleive me I know. But ask yourself is sitting at home and not having fun going to help you get over him or will it effect whether or not he comes back if you go watch the game. Believe me it wont!!!! So go out and have fun. I have learned one thing and that is you never want your ex to know that you are sitting around being miserable. Hope that little advice helps you. Talk to you all later......................Kodiak

[kodiak]

lexb,

 

 

 

My ex broke up with me over the phone too because it was long distance. It sucks so bad because there is so much that you wish you could tell them in person. Hang in there, I need a vacation too. We need to all go on liek a broken hearted, miss your ex, cruise..lol........................Kodiak

[netrie]

Originally posted by mj108

Eventhough I feel like I don't have the energy---from all the crying & emotional pain & all the beers the last 2 weeks---I have decided to go back to my class today---it's been 2 weeks (excercising)---& they are probably going to all kick my butt because I've been on a 2 week drunk.

 

Girl, you need to get some therapy. This is NOT good. I say this very sincerely. It sure helps to get to the bottom of "what is going on inside of our souls."

 

Good luck to you.

 

Sincerely,

Netalia

[dugs]

hey guys!!!

 

I just caught up on all your posts. whew!! there sure are alot since I was last here. Anyways all of you hang in there, it will get better somehow.

 

Mj- Go watch the game, it will hopefully get your mind off of things for awhile. Is your ex still calling you from blocked numbers? If so I think that you should maybe answer it sometime soon. That is, if you are actually still interested in him. He's calling you for a reason, maybe he misses you, maybe he wants to try and be friends. I know that it might be hard to talk to him again, how long has it been since you guys last talked? I think that you should take a risk, I would have never gotten into my present situation if I hadn't taken a risk and called her one day after not talking to her for like two months.

 

Drj- I think that you should chill out for a while and not do anything. Give it like two months without contacting her. In that time she will contact you or if not you can give her a call and she will most definintly answer your call, and if she ever cared about you then she will be excited to hear from you.

 

Kodiak- I think you should do the same thing, if she ever really cared about you then she will call you, or be happy to hear from you if you call her.

 

The way I see it, the longer the time period is between contact then the better it is. It's kinda like a cleansing thing. If you go a couple of months without talking to them then its like they will forget about every desperate action you took in the past. They will see you in a different light and then you can start over from there and try and build somthing up if you want to. This is how it was for me anyways.

 

backspn- High fives and slaps on the butt. Good play man. It seems as though you and me finally made it through this living nightmare.

 

As for me, I hung out again with the ex ex girlfriend last night and it was great. It was even better than old times, we actually talked about us for alittle bit, and it seems as if everything is getting back to normal.

 

I was thinking, my whole history of my breakup is somewere on this site and you guys don't exactly know what all happened during the darkest hours of my breakup. So I decided to post this link to show you just how bad and hopeless things can get before thay can get better.

 

before you read this post let me explain a few things:

 

1. I was extremely mad when I wrote this post, I blew some thing out of proportion. the way I describe the sex pictures ( yes, it's pretty juicy) is not entirely acurate. They weren't really sex pictures at all, all bathing suits were on and there wasn't any penatration or stuff like that. It was more like just kissing and poses for the camera, they were drunk and messing around for the camera.

 

2. SHe feels extremely BAD for what she did, I hear she cried her eyes out the next day because she fekt so stupid, and yes we have talked about the whole thing and dealt with it.

 

3. She is young and hey, thats what young newly single drunk girls do in Lake Havasu I suppose.

 

4 Me and my friend have talked it over and he apologized alot for taking some of the pictures.

 

Anyways, Enjoy...and please don't give me too hard of a time!

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?threadid=43279

[kodiak]

dugs-

 

Good to hear from you my brother. I dont know you but im very happy for you and your ex and I hope this time things work out for the best. Its awesome to see that people do get a second chance. As far as how you felt about the pics, I dont blame you. I would be pissed of too. But hey **** happens and we do our best to put it behind us. Thanks for the advice about my ex. It so hard because we broke up with no anger and still much love. Long distance roared its ugly head and thats pretty much why things went wrong. I dont have any reason to be mad at her so the break up I feel is harder to get over and missing her is a constant daily battle. I guess Im just going to put it on the backburner for awhile. Take Care buddy and once again congrats on getting your ex back..........Kodiak

[backspn]

"You'll Think Of Me"

 

I woke up early this morning around 4am

With the moon shining bright as headlights on the interstate

I pulled the covers over my head and tried to catch some sleep

But thoughts of us kept keeping me awake

Ever since you found yourself in someone else's arms

I've been tryin' my best to get along

But that's OK

There's nothing left to say, but

 

Take your records, take your freedom

Take your memories I don't need'em

Take your space and take your reasons

But you'll think of me

And take your cat and leave my sweater

'Cause we have nothing left to weather

In fact I'll feel a whole lot better

But you'll think of me, you'll think of me

 

I went out driving trying to clear my head

I tried to sweep out all the ruins that my emotions left

I guess I'm feeling just a little tired of this

And all the baggage that seems to still exist

It seems the only blessing I have left to my name

Is not knowing what we could have been

What we should have been

So

 

Take your records, take your freedom

Take your memories I don't need'em

Take your space and take your reasons

But you'll think of me

And take your cat and leave my sweater

'Cause we have nothing left to weather

In fact I'll feel a whole lot better

But you'll think of me

 

Someday I'm gonna run across your mind

Don't worry, I'll be fine

I'm gonna be alright

While you're sleeping with your pride

Wishing I could hold you tight

I'll be over you

And on with my life

 

So take your records, take your freedom

Take your memories I don't need'em

And take your cat and leave my sweater

'Cause we have nothing left to weather

In fact I'll feel a whole lot better

But you'll think of me

 

So take your records, take your freedom

Take your memories I don't need'em

Take your space and all your reasons

But you'll think of me

And take your cat and leave my sweater

'Cause we got nothing left to weather

In fact I'll feel a whole lot better

But you'll think of me, you'll think of me, yeah

 

And you're gonna think of me

Oh someday baby, someday

 

Perfect song for all of us......their losses.

[kodiak]

hey everybody-

 

 

That is a great song. I first heard that with my ex and that was liek a song with both sang and listened too together all the time. So its a great song for a breakup but it kinda hurts for me a little.....Kodiak

[kodiak]

Het Everybody-

 

 

Well it looks like im the only up at this late hour posting right now. Good for you guys, I hope you are not like me right now, sitting by yourself, missing your ex. Well its been a tough day for me and I dont know why. I didnt talk to her, but I guess I just miss her. Why cant I get over her? I was telling my mom today that all i want is to wake up one day and not think about her. Not miss her, not get sad and teary eyed. Thats all i want. I guess there is a reason why it is taking so long for me and why I seemed to have made no really progress. For everybody who is in my boat please dont use me as an example. Im a rarety. Most people by now would have probably moved on a little bit, but not me. My mom told me that there is a reason why I cant move on. Sure maybe this is the girl that I am suppose to be with but just not right now. Whi knows? I mean why did I have to fall inlove with this gilr that lived nearly three hundred miles away. Why? I told my mom that and she replied with this. Why did she(my ex) have to pick you out of all those hundred other guys at the place that night, and out of all those guys that lived in the same city she does. I guess there is a reason for that. I wish i could get my second chance and mnake it really work. I mean I could see myslef marrying this gilr. I would love to be able to tell my grandchildren one day how their grandmother and I met. It would be a great love story. I miss her so much right now everyone. I mean maybe she did meet someone else and thast why thigs ended. Maybe she just did not want to hurt me anymore than I already was thats why she didnt say anything.I think about that and then i realize if that is the case then she wasnt the girl I thought she was. However I figure that if that was true then I doubt she would keeo in contact with me at all. Maybe im wrong but thats how I feel. Anyways I guess I should try to get some sleep. I have to get up in five hours for work. I will catch everybody tomorrow. Goodnite........................Kodaik

 

 

P:S Drjones congrats on thsi thread, its at over three hundred now. Good Job my brother, good job

[djones]

Hey Guys,

 

Sorry about not replying to the posts...my internet was down all day yesterday since 12:00 noon and I just got it back this morning GrrRR....I have to read your posts I hope somone has replied to each one of you....I will give you all an up date with me....yesterday, after noon I got call on my cell from my ex, I did not expect it and it was a number from her work that I did not recognize you know the offices has different numbers...etc....well anyway she talked to me and asked me out to meet her for lunch, I was caught off guard and I said yes and meet up with her.....we talked for hours by the time we were finished it was like 3;00pm and she had to get back...we talked about everything how she was doing, how I was etc.....we were comfortable and I guess I collapsed again (I cant help it) I told her that I miss her and that I want her bact ect....before that time we would be looking at each other eyes and it was real nice....so I guess I threw all my cards again guys....when she would look at me she would look into my eys and say what?....and I would say nothing and she would say tell me and she said you can tell me anything you want....so I guess at that point I colloapsed and spilled all my feelings to her...I could see that I was getting to her and she had a smile on her face and her eyes was getting a little watery....but I said something stupid can I kiss her, she said she cant and she said how would you like it if we were dating and some other guy said if I could kiss you....I told her I am sorry I sohould not said that and I should respect you and your relationship with this guy....she did not say it to me in a mean or angry way, so when I said sorry she knew I meant it.....then later she said that she was almost single today...she did not get into it (but I guess the guy saved his ass by talking to her).......So after that we said goodbye and she left

I think I blew it guys by spillling my guts to her, I jujst feel why the hell I have nothing to lose I am not with her and if she says in the next few weeks that she doens not want to talk to me, well then I guess I know in my heart that I have to move one and forget her....I told my mom what I did and she thinks that I should not have said my feelings to her...my ex knows how I feel (which I know she does) and I should have wait untill she says it to me.....I just dont like playing these cat and mouse games....and I dont know if I played this game right...I know I am supposed to be the man...but does not being a man means to stand up speak your mind....I hate bottleing up how I feel about her....maybe I scared her off by saying what I said ( i said some real romantic things and I can see that I touched her heart...but I dont know maybe I am fooling myself)....I dont know I guess i did what I did b/c I lost her already and I dont know if I will ever get her again but I can aleast know that I told her how I felt fface to face adn I know in my heart I moved her...for whatever thats worth........

I dont know what to do now guys, I figure I said enough and I am not going to e-mail her, I will wait to see if she calls/e-mails me....I know next week friday she going on vaction for 10 days so maybe by thursday if I dont hear from her I will just e-mail her and say have a nice trip.....but I am scared now that maybe I did ***** it up by saying my feelings to her....I dont know guys...I just do these things sometimes without thinking, but she just moves me and I just had to tell her......i dont know how to have a woman want me...I never had a woman after me except one, but she was not good for me.....my ex wanted me and I wanted her, I just dont know how you keep a balance in a relationship....I know when we were together it was equal, but now that I had told her my feelings are we equal again???? I dont know if you all understadn what I am tring to get at....(she will not tell me how she feels about me b/c of respect for the guy she is seeing, so all I have to go on is what I can see in her eyes and her face)....

 

sorry for the long post...I am just mentaly drained today...

[crazydawg]

Hey guys, i will start off by saying this is my last post. Kodak knows my story pretty much. I just wanted to say today i cried. I haven't done so in maybe 2 years. I did so only because i let go of what i love. This thread is correct if its meant to be they will come back. I don't believe my ex wants to come back, its a feeling i have deep down inside. I tried everything, talking, NC, Stalking, Spilling guts, Trying to make her chase me. I think guys its time to give up. This is the hardest thing i will ever do. Its tearing me apart inside, but i know what i have todo. I suggest if you have that same feeling i do, to let go. Cry and let go. Its because ur body is telling u not to go through this again. I know my and my ex were perfect for each other. Its just not going to happen and time doesn't rewind. **** Happens GUYS, For me to cry over someone is the biggest feat i've done in a long time. I did it because i know in my heart its over. I also know that if she wanted to she would have tried working things out, but she didn't. They moved on and its not fair for us. I hope everyone understands where i'm coming from. I will read everyone's elses post and if i feel i need to i might reccoment a comment. But i will never mention "How do i get my ex back" again. I wish everyone here the best of luck. Especially Kodak, Dreamguy, and everyone else whose summer sucked. If my ex contacts me ever again, as hard as it will be, i will never give in.

Best of luck

Chris

[WantanS4]

drjones,

 

You blew it man... you blew it. I'm sure she has feelings for you too.... but when you slip your guts to her... she feels obligated/pushed to recipricate those feelings... and FROM MY HUMBLE s***TY experience, women don't like to be pushed around.

 

NOW WILL YOU JUST BITE THE BULLET AND HOLD YOUR HORSES?!?!?!?! Wait... just wait.... think of it this way.. each time you persist, you add 1 month to your sentence.

 

What should you do now.......... LIVE YOUR OWN LIFE....... she knows how you feel about her....... and I'm sure in some way she's pretty sure she's not going to 'lose' you anytime soon...... so now you have to PLAY ON THAT........... disappear...... vanish......... build your mystery............ then...... when the **** hits the fan for her with the other guy........ BOOM! you'll pop into her mind.... and WHAM! she'll wonder whatever happened to you...... and ZAP! she'll start 'searching' for you.

 

PLAY IT LIKE THIS.. don't be a BONE head anymore

 

And for crying out loud......... if you get a call... and you don't recognize the number....... LET THEM LEAVE YOU A MESSAGE.. if it's important.. they'll leave a message... if not....... then forget about it and don't read into it.

 

If only I were in your shoes.........gosh............

[mj108]

Netrie--thanks for your input---I'm doing much better now.

 

Dugsy Boy----I'm happy for you. I'm glad you were able to work things out with her. Keep in touch & let us know how it goes. Also, if my buddy calls me about that football game, I'm going.

 

Backspun---The words to that song...wow! It was one of the songs I listed. I love that video too. It is a great song for all of us.

 

drjones---You didn't do anything wrong about sharing your feelings but try not to do it again. She knows how you feel. I've done the same thing with my ex. As a matter of fact our last conversation I told him "You know what I would do for you...you mean..." And he finished by saying "I know what I mean to you." So---don't beat yourself up. Just try not to let it happen again. You didn't do anything wrong.

 

Kodiak---How are you doing today? I hope you are ok. I'm feeling sad & blue now. I've been wondering if I should call him or not. It's been 2 weeks/1day. I'm scared that if I do...I'll just get my hopes up again. That's what keeping me from calling, you know?

 

Crazydawg---Going to miss ya! I hope you still Keep in touch with us. I know one day I'm going to break down & realize it's over. I haven't cried yet---but I know it's coming on day. I hope when I do cry---I will shed the last tear for him & move on. I hope you post again & we hear from you. Good luck & remember you can always come on here to vent.