If its meant to be they will come back to you.

[Weird]

yep, I was my exes first serious relationship too. I think she knwos she wont find a guy better for her than me but hey, all the power to her if that is what she decides to seek out.

 

I am with nick...I wouldn't get invovled unless I was ready for it and felt the other person was ready for it.

 

 

atlous,

 

I say you give the guy a chance to try and show you he realizes his mistakes and has changed for the better. Don't like get back together with him but just hang around him and see if he has in fact changed like he said he has.

 

edit...hmmm, I like wantan's answer:)

[LexiB]

Just imagine that--one of these evil creatures we call our exes/human beings, actually going out of their way to beg for forgiveness and admit to being the pieces of s**t we've christened them so many times before...ahh, the thought really does put a smile on my face lol.

 

But seriously Atlous, thats great! I hope I hope I hope I hope I hope I hope this guy proves to be sincere!!! Of course no one knows the future but this could be the start of a very good thing...

 

If I was in ur position, sanity aside, I would be soo tempted to just take him back right then and there to not risk losing him again. But youre absoulutely right--the risk of getting hurt again is much more severe.

 

Between your own common sense and Wantans advice, youre on the right track. Get him to be completely honest with where he stands and make sure he knows what you expect from him (so he cant accuse you of "changing" or some other bs like that) and just proceed with caution from there.

 

If this starts out right, your relationship should be stronger than ever

 

Best of luck 2 ya gurl!

 

ps. weird, Nick, drj--thanks for ur imput to my little drama! Ill keep up the butt kickin just for you

[djones]

Atlous,

 

Thats great to hear, I so glad to hear the way you are handleing it...I would prob just cave in...I am going to take mental notes if this ever happens to me with my ex ....I would have to agree with WantanS4 play it out like what he said, and jsut make sure this dude does not break your heart....make sure he is genuine b/c we dont want to see you here again as much as we like you...the goal of this group is to get every one of us the ***** of this thing....we got Dugs off someone else needs to go!!!

[Cade]

Hey people,

 

Been following the thread from the get-go. Contributed here and there. I am into about 2 weeks no contact now, longest ever and it only gets easier. Feelings of missing her immensely have turned into bitterness and resentment.

 

Atlous,

 

This is for you and I had to say something. I am very happy for you!! I totally understand how you wish you could take him in your arms and hold him as you have been waiting for this moment for sooo long. DON'T allow all the hard work go to waste here!!! I fell into that trap, more details if you go back a few pages but she had split from her fling, showed up at my door as I was doing no contact and asked her to leave me be. I had my daughter so she knew it would only be her and I and not the girl i was seeing at the time. She showed up crying, resentful, and it was one of the first times I had seen her so "raw" as you put it. I believed her sincerity at the time, and never hesitated. I took her into my arms, held her tight and told her I would never let her go again.

Summary is it was great for 6 weeks but all the talk about her working on herself, hitting counselling never ever happened. I could see that I had changed for the better and she was back to her old ways in no time. It ended about 2.5 months ago..

Bottom line is that I should have made her earn my trust, let her prove to me that she had changed, as actions speak louder than words, and I should have took it slow with her instead of jumping back in like nothing happened previous.

 

In other words, make him work for your trust, let him prove that he has changed and do not give him a clue on your feelings towards him at all. He is scared now but if you take him back so easily what makes you think he will not do this to you again when the next interest comes along, knowing how easy it is to get you back whenever he wants?? You still have alot of work ahead of you, and you must not lose focus now of all times. Things are panning out, the tables have turned, but you must play this game to the end.

Don't forget all the hurt he has caused you, all the work you have put into ignoring him and pretending you don't care about him. He hurt you immensely and should not be allowed to waltz back into your life, let him suffer now and prove himself. He may be just using you as a crutch as his self-esteem is low right now with the break up and he is seeking someone who would give him unconditional love, something everyone craves.

On the up side, he may be sincere and I truly hope he is. Some people just don't realize what they had till it's gone and this may be what he has discovered.

 

Keep it up, don't give in, make him work at getting you back now. People appreciate more something they have to work for, more rewarding.

 

 

DON'T LOSE YOUR FOCUS ATLOUS!!!!!

 

I have learned the hard way and am still going. She still calls daily after I requested she leave me be, no messages. If important she will leave one. She knows where I work, live, if she wants me she has hell to pay now and she better come back groveling as I decided that is the only way I will take her if I would. She would have a hell of alot of making up to do and work on herself before I would let on I am even remotely interested.... She has definite issues, wish everyone was decent like us people here damnit!!

 

Cade..

 

Love is like a shadow. Chase it and it runs away. Walk away and it will follow you.

[atlous]

Thanks for your advice everyone. I am not angry anymore rather confused. how do you end up *****ing two nineteen year old in our two year relationship and have changed. I mean how does someone sleep with another so fast doesn't there have to be feelings invloved. I don't know how he can just screw other women and then realize oh hey I need her back. I feel hurt and used. I don't think that it will ever work you know. He breaks up with me screws the fat chick for a couple of months and then calls me. I don't think so. I don't want to be mad I am just thinking that people like this never change. I don't take sex as soemthing that you can do with just anyone? How does he do this any advice guys? He knows that there is someone else that is interested and that I can't be with him until I am over him! Do I get over him and never contact him again or do I believe that people like him do not change. i feel like if I mention one more time that he hurt me it will be like I am a broken record and I can never get over things. He really liked her and now he doesn't I don't understand? I mean really it's not like I don't work with hot guys I know what I had at home and I didn't want to mess that up. I really miss the way he looks at me and how he was. I am reallllllly messed up guys

[crazydawg]

atlous, i'm sorry to hear your story. I feel that he isn't going to change. People don't change overnight. If you take him back you'd be losing all your self respect. What your telling him is that he can do what he pleases. If you want to teach him a lesson don't ever take him back better yet don't ever talk to him again. I'm doing the same with my ex girlfriend she's had a habbit of dumping everyguy for someone else. It happened to me and she wants to be friends. Yea right, she needs to learn the hard way that what she does is ****ed up

[head/heels]

Atlous.... do not do anything for a good while....I am in the same situation, but my girl left me and i dont know if she is having sex with the other guy or not, but i would not be too surprised if she was (even though i never would of thought that of her before, but now it is like i dont even know her).... She was my first and i was her second so now i see that it meant way way way more to me than it did to her since she had already given up her viginity and had her heart ripped open......now i guess it was my turn....I find myself thinkning "hey this girl [i met someone i knew from when i was younger earlier this week and i ended up hooking up with her (just kissing) and then i cooked for her and took her out.... and while i was shopping for her i thought of how i would always do this for my ex and we would always end up having the best time together later in the evening] is good looking and what if by some freak chance i let it move to the next level?"

 

So what i am saying is: It took me 20 years to lose my virginity to the perfect girl (or so i thought) but after 4 years together now i guess sex wouldnt be as hard to have with a new person if i let my hormones get the best of me......which i wont since i have too much respect for sexual intercourse and what it brings into a relationship and i am not going to have a one night stand becuase that just isnt me....

 

SO Atlous....you and i and most of the rest of us are the same and hold sex way too dear to us and what it means to us inside of a relationship.....He obviously does not and I posed the question to NICK if he would take his ex back she had sex with a guy she left him for.....I just dont think my heart and mind could ever get over it (NOW if she didnt have sex with the guy she left me for, but the next guy she saw, then i would be a little less harsh on her since we are broken up and the whole she needs to see what she is missing thing....)

 

But i personally would not have sex with someone i want 100% in love with and expect to spend the rest of my life with...so i am not going to say that i am not going to have sex again til i am married (i wish i could say that) but it will have to be someone who can prove her love to me through her words, actions, and do so over a very long period of time.... SO I WOULD NOT TAKE HIM BACK BUT ACT INDIFFERENT TO HIS ADVANCES AND MAKE HIM PROVE HOW MUCH HE WANTS YOU AND HIM TO BE BY HIS ACTIONS AND NOT HIS WORDS OR EMOTIONS.....

TAKE IT VERY VERY VERY VERY SLOWLY AND VERY VERY VERY CAUTIOUSLY.........

 

CAN YOU LIVE WITH WHAT HE HAS DONE?

 

i would really like to know since one day i might be in you situation....i just dont think i could take her back....she ruined us for her own selfishness and insecurities and then lied to me as to why she broke it off....i just dont want that kind of woman in my life ....i deserve better (even though she was the epitome of a great woman for the first 3.5 years of our relationship- it was then that she said she doubted us but was scared to say anything because she didnt want to believe she was falling out of love with the man of her dreams....

 

Se la vie.........i am a better man today and i have learned and i am going to become a doctor that will end up helping people like her with their insecurities... ( i want to be a plastic surgeon).....so i am worthy of greater women and you are worthy of a greater man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

REALLY!!!

 

oh and by the way, the girl i cooked for is leaving for a job in savannah Georgia and she is definitely not what i am looking for, but she is nice and fun but a little less intellectual than i am looking for....I am now in the position to be choosy and find what I want!!!

 

OH and to all who cant se themselves dating again....It really helped me to find out that she left me for antoher since after that my love for her has dwindled daily...(although after this little date i could help but find myself saying "I miss that girl" to my friends and "why did she throw it all away for nothing" to myself...

But then i think "she made her choice and i did all i could do and i have to live with that and she has to live with letting someone go who loved her unconditionally and would have never cheated on her and gave her my world"

 

 

Sorry so long but does anyone here think they could get back with their ex if they had sex/ started up a new relationship days/1-2 weeks after breaking up?

 

I just dont see myself being able to do it.....anyone?

Who in here had an ex who really left just for space and time or whatever and not for a SPECIFIC other?

[kodiak]

head/heels-did you think of any good advice for me on my situation. I can use some good feedback about now. please

[head/heels]

i posed some questions for you but here they are again:

 

whoa! man

let me think about this one over night and ill try to come up with something.....

 

I guess i need to know how much you suffocated her with it being long distance and how bad did the insecuritys get ...i.e. how much did she get to see of your insecurities and have you apologized and said you realize why she left you?

 

How far are you and how is her mood about life w/o you?

any other info would help too...

 

just on stuff that relates to her and you in the last 2 months and the last 4 months on the phone would help...I guess i am wondering what she was going thru with your insecurites...did she try to help you with them...ease your mind by telling you there is nothing to worry about or did she just immediately get mad or quiet?

 

i ll see what my mind comes up with and give any advice that i can.....sounds tough with it ending with her knowing she still loves you!

 

 

 

 

 

that was my last post but i guess i would be suspicious about how the two of you met and the long distance....

i.e. ---maybe she is someone who likes to be on the dating websites and maybe she continued with that since you two were apart and she used that as her thrill....

 

I DONT WANT TO UPSET YOU, But i never thought my ex would do what she would do (leave me for another even though she was 110% needy until the day she left me) and i was in denial as to what she did for at least 2 months....i still have a hard time believing she had the strentgh and nerve and courgage to leave me since she was basically attached to me via an umbilical cord.....Well i found out later she just moved her umbilical cord to another suitor that paid her a compliment or two and she found attractive b/c that was all it took since she had low self esteem...

 

So. even if you dont believe it or could even think to swallow....face it b/c it may be true......I know it would suck to find out and you'll want to call her and yell and scream at her to see if there is someone else....but you DO NOT DO THAT....LET HER GO AND MAKE HER MISTAKES AND THEN WHEN/IF SHE COMES BACK YOU WILL HAVE TO LAY DOWN THE PARAMETERS....

 

did you two ever think to move in together or at least move to her city or vice versa?

 

SO if she is so hung up on your problems with the insecurity....did you tell her you would get help?

did you tell her you can change? (well first off did she ask you to change and you didnt or did she just say this was the reason for the breakup and it was the first you really (i mean really knew it was a problem she was having) heard of it?

 

So answer me that and i will see what my instincts come up with with this new information...

 

Either way this turns out (with her or without) you will find someone who will give you the chance to fix your problems and will stick by you while you do....UNCONDITIONAL LOVE!!!

[deb0735]

There are very few good things to say about heartbreak. One thing it does---it lets you know you're alive. It also makes the next time you feel love all the sweeter.

[kodiak]

head/heels-

 

thanks for your reply. will you be on teh site for a few more minutes. i will answer all your questions. I cant sleep, standard these days so I can type all i want. Plus im at work so i have nothing else to do except what for a call.thanks a million................Kodiak

[head/heels]

just wondering what your story is and how you have come to that statment.... i do believe you but right now i am undecided since i have a problem not being able to control what i believe my ex is making poor personal decisions.....hard to see her not realize what she is running from is herself and i think she might know that but doesnt have the strentgh to face her problems and self.....

[head/heels]

go ahead

[kodiak]

head/heels-

 

well here I go. I will try to answer all the questions that you asked me to the best of my knowledge. Liek I said befoire we were very close. Ofcourse maybe i thought we were closer than she did, but we were still very close around each other. We did things and shared things that my buddies dont do with there GF of years. Im not talking about sexual stuff either,lol, just everyday stuff. Anyways at first i wasnt insecure at all with our relationship. I wasnt totally inot the whole thing. She was the first to say "I love you" etc.. Then one day I relaized how much i was inlove with this girl. She was not the type that like d to talk on the phone alot, but we still shared our hour long talks. However she was also very independent. She had a very busy schedule with work and was always doing things. I used to call her alot just to say hi and she was cool with that. However when she didnt pick up my mind would start to make stuff up in my head. She met somebody else, shes screwing around on me, etc... I will explain more of this later. So ofourse i would call back and call back. Then when she would call me back she could tell in my voice that i was mad and i would make a stupid comment. This happened more in teh last month of our relationship. I would call her when I know she would go out with her girlfriends, just so i could be re assured that nothing was going on. After one of our fights I told her that im sorry and were all this stemmed from. she told me that nomatter whats shes doing or who shes hanging out with that she loves me and is so happy that she found me. well anyways she met a friend at work and they started hanging out alot. She was a good girl and I met her several times. She too had a boyfriend. However him and i were the exact opposites. i had a good job, would treat my Gf to dinner and buy her nice things. He on the other hand never had money. His Gf my exs friend would always pay. It was kinda sad. She used to tell my ex how lucky i was that she had such a great BF. Anyways we hung out the four of us quite a bit. Well she started hanging out alot with her. Her Bf worked nights so they would go out and party and have fun. Stuff girls do at that age, i guess. Well this is when things started to get bad for me. My insecurities really kicked in and I started to show her through my actions and words that i didnt trust her. You see head/heels, deep in my heart i always trusted her but my mind would make me think otherwise. Well like i said she started to get angry with me. It hurt her, all of it hurt her bad and i knew it. As I said in the previous post I went to vist her for the kast time and things were great. I never felt so loved by her before, i guess i was wrong. Finally one day she called me and i made a stupid comment and she just corked. I went through all the crap on the first day. She cried, I cried, it was horrible. Anyways I asked her if she met someone else because i needed to know and thats when she said those words that will eat at my heart forever. She said, " thats the problem you never trusted me, nomatter what i did for you or how much I loved you it was never enough" It still kills me today. I hate myself for ruining such a good thing.

So i guess i showed my insecurites alot to her. She told me over and over agin that she loved me and I had nothing to worry about, but like I said before I could never get it through my head. She tried to help me but it was of no good. I was so afraid of loosing her to someone else just like my last ex. My last ex cheated on me when I was nothing but good to her. I felt that I had to go the extra mile because this was a LDR. I guess all this caused was her to feel smothered. after the breakup i went to a shrink for about two months. She helped me alot and I only wish i had a second chance to show my ex how much I changed. It took so much for me to see a shrink but I felt that if she ever came back, it was worth every penny, and the embarrassment i felt at times. However i guess it was too late for her. She had enough. I have never once begged her to comeback or I never call her. She calls me about once a month. I try to reach out but sometimes I just get ignored, so i gave that up.

 

As for how we met. Well we met at a place in her city where she lives. It was like a bar/lounge. It was the last place that my buddies and I went too that night. Our fourth stop. She came up to me and we talked and I gave her a kiss goodbye. we exchanged numbers and that was it. That night my phone rings and it was her friend calling for her. My ex got on the phone and she just said hoew nice i was, etc... She was nervous because she said I was the first guy that she ever pursued. Well i went back home the next day and she called taht night. we talked until 3 in teh morning and thats were it all began. We started seeing each other and the rest was history. Im getting a little choked up here, sorry. I mean out of all those guys there that night and all the ones that lived in the same city she did, she had to pick me. Why?why?Why? I wish i could marry this girl because I would love to tell my children one day how their mother and i met. Its a classic story in my eyes.

 

So here I am today. I still miss her so so much. Our relationmship was only 11 montsh but it kills me everyday. Im sure by know she has moved on. I dont know, nor do i want too. If its meant to be it will come back, i guess. When we talk it is great and I still can make her laugh like i used too. She is the first and last thing i think about each day. I sent her card wishing her good luck with her surgery, but she never said thanks. i feel taht I screwed up because i said that I missed her. Since then I havnt heard a word from her. Oh well maybe i did screw up but atleast she knows that I still care. I know that she has alot fo growing up to do and so do I. I think maybe she wasnt raedy for the relationship to get as serious as it did, ie. me meeting all her family, her meeting mine, vacations together etc... She is still young and is trying toi get her life in order. as i said in my previous post i have alot going for me at 24. Well I hope i answered the questions and you can give me some feedback. I knew when we broke up she still loved me but Im sure that has changed now, who knows. I have to let it go, but its just so damm hard. Not a day has gone by in four months that my love for her has faded even the slightest bit. As long as I live I will always thnk of her as the "one that got away" Its hard when you screw that up too like i did. Thanks for reading this long post.......................Kodiak

[kodiak]

drjones-

 

I see yoru up too. when will the insomnia end???? How are you doing these days? I just finished writting that post to head/heels. Im trying to get some input on my situation. well its been a monthof NC so its kinda hurting but I know its for the best. Hopefully it will help me move on.

[djones]

Hey guys

 

I am, up as well same thing I cant sleep....I wll read your posts...hey kodiak you still there?

[kodiak]

im here my brother, im here

[head/heels]

does she know any of this....??

i.e what you wrote to me?

 

Did she ever bring it up to you abotu how it was affecting her...?

 

do you think if you two got back together you would act differently for 1 or 2 months and then revert to your old self?

i.e. have you really changed...you can lie to me if you want but you deep down know if you have changed or are continue to change for the better......only you know.

 

did she ever warn you that it hurt her and she wasnt going to be able to take it or something like i am going to end it if you dont fix this?

 

why does she call you?

 

and is she going to call back or not?

 

what do you talk about?

 

how far (miles) from her town?

 

finally, does she know about how mcuh you care for her and you know what you did wrong and got help (maybe if you two get back together you could continue counseling as much for her as you)..

 

and finally

why did she not want to work on it with you if she still loves you....she doesnt sound like a fighter... alot like my ex, but she didnt even tell me she had any problems with me...then when she did (after she broke up) she later told me it didnt have anything to do with me but with her and she jsut said those so she had a reason to break up....she is confused but such is life and she lost me.....now i dont know what you should do....

 

if she is receptive, then go fight for her....!!!!!

If she still has feelings then go and get her and tell her you (no just bring her a copy of exactly what you wrote earlier tonite to me) and tell her you would like another chance to love her for her....

 

if she isnt, then i can only say that she needs to grow up b/c you dont reallly break up with someone you still love as a partner unless you really think it is for the best and your life would be harder trying to help the other become the person they want to be than living without that person....

 

What does she say and how is her mood when she calls?

 

and is it random when she calls or what?

 

i guess we are in the same boat as to happens next (although i cant go and see her or woo her or call her b/c i know she isnt receptive now....

 

keep up with theNC until some of us on here can assess the situation...does she still live with this girl and does she go out and party?

 

Is there a place you can be seen having a good ol time where you know she hangs out?

if so i would show up looking my best with my mates and some lookers who you can flirt with and see if that jump starts her feelings....maybe she just needs this time to see how it is without you.......i dont know withou more info.

 

Everyone on the FORUM lets see what we can come up with as to what is the best course of action now that she has made her decision on KODIAK..

 

either way

HANG IN THERE AND REALIZE THAT NOT MANY WOULD ADDRESS HIMSELF AND THE FLAWS HE HAS AND FACE THEM AND GET HELP FOR THEM>>>>VERY FEW DESERVE AND WILL END UP GETTING MEN (or women) LIKE THAT!

 

i imagine, even with your flaw--which was a pretty bad one(my friend has the same one(only he seems like he will never learn , my other friends concur) that you were still the catch in the relationship...

just a hunch

[djones]

Hey Kodiak,

 

I am doing ok, yeah this insomina crap is hurting me too...I am doing better, i dont expect her to call me and I am getting my life in order, once in a while I still miss her, but its not as frequent, i guess its b/c i am tring to keep my self busy....I dont know I guess If she will call she will, I dont know if she will call me, so I start to say to my self there is nothing i can do and that helps me at least...

[kodiak]

head/heels- thanks for reading that rather lengthy post. I will answer more of your questions tomorrow as i hopefully can get some sleep. Thanks again though.

 

drjones- hang in there bro. we have to catch up. Im off work tomorrow so i will be able to catch and post. Talk to you soon my brother.......................Kodiak

[head/heels]

that is if we dont want them back...

 

"Cry Me A River"

 

You were my sun

You were my earth

But you didn't know all the ways I loved you, no

So you took a chance

And made other plans

But I bet you didn't think that they would come crashing down, no

 

You don't have to say, what you did,

I already know, I found out from him

Now there's just no chance, for you and me, there'll never be

And don't it make you sad about it

 

You told me you loved me

Why did you leave me, all alone

Now you tell me you need me

When you call me, on the phone

Girl I refuse, you must have me confused

With some other guy

Your bridges were burned, and now it's your turn

To cry, cry me a river

Cry me a river-er

Cry me a river

Cry me a river-er, yea yea

 

I know that they say

That somethings are better left unsaid

It wasn't like you only talked to him and you know it

(Don't act like you don't know it)

All of these things people told me

Keep messing with my head

(Messing with my head)

You should've picked honesty

Then you may not have blown it

(Yea..)

 

You don't have to say, what you did,

(Don't have to say, what you did)

I already know, I found out from him

(I already know, uh)

Now there's just no chance, for you and me, there'll never be

(No chance, you and me)

And don't it make you sad about it

 

You told me you loved me

Why did you leave me, all alone

(All alone)

Now you tell me you need me

When you call me, on the phone

(When you call me on the phone)

Girl I refuse, you must have me confused

With some other guy

(I'm not like them baby)

Your bridges were burned, and now it's your turn

(It's your turn)

To cry, cry me a river

(Go on and just)

Cry me a river-er

(Go on and just)

Cry me a river

(Baby go on and just)

Cry me a river-er, yea yea

 

Oh

(Oh)

The damage is done

So I guess I be leaving

Oh

(Oh)

The damage is done

So I guess I be leaving

Oh

(Oh)

The damage is done

So I guess I be leaving

Oh

(Oh)

The damage is done

So I guess I be... leaving

 

You don't have to say, what you did,

(Don't have to say, what you did)

I already know, I found out from him

(I already know, uh)

Now there's just no chance, for you and me, there'll never be

(No chance, you and me)

And don't it make you sad about it

 

Cry me a river

(Go on and just)

Cry me a river-er

(Baby go on and just)

Cry me a river

(You can go on and just)

Cry me a river-er, yea yea

 

Cry me a river

(Baby go on and just)

Cry me a river-er

(Go on and just)

Cry me a river

(Cause I've already cried)

Cry me a river-er, yea yea

(Ain't gonna cry no more, yea-yea)

 

Cry me a river

Cry me a river, oh

Cry me a river, oh

Cry me a river, oh

 

Cry me a river, oh

(Cry me, cry me)

Cry me a river, oh

(Cry me, cry me)

Cry me a river, oh

(Cry me, cry me)

Cry me a river, oh

(Cry me, cry me)

 

Cry me a river, oh

(Cry me, cry me)

Cry me a river, oh

(Cry me, cry me)

Cry me a river

(Cry me, cry me

 

 

 

 

SORRY GUYS FOR THE JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE being the singer (just heard it on my radio) and all but the words are very true for some of us...

now britney must be crying a river since she is with that himbo with two kids...

[Weird]

I don't think I could ever get back with an ex if she went and humped another dude. The reason being she would have to have kept thinking about me and had feelings for me all the while she was humping that dude. People don't just magically wake up one day and get thier feelings for someone back. So knowing that, I would look at her as using a "cheat for free" card simply because she ocld hump another dude but not technically be a cheater since we weren't together anymore BUT again, during that time she still had thoughts of reconciling with me sop she should know better to not be sleeping with another dude.

 

I dunno if that sounds confusing or if anyone thinks I have basis to it but it is how I view it.

 

I also love readng here how many of our exes act the same, meaning they make up bull**** excuses of why they want to breakup and we all can see through them and are insulted they think we are that dumb to buy the crap they are telling us. Most of our exes seem like the standard confused runawayers that seem mroe widespread in our society than I had initially thought. I used to think my ex doing this runaway thing was sorta rare...after seeing my friends go though the same thing and now you fine people I see she is like a good majority of people.

[djones]

Hey Guys,

 

Kodiak-- hang in there man, yeah when you get a chance we need to catch up....I think head/heels has some really good questions you should answer...I know every one is saying do the NC thing....it might be the best thing right now, one thing that is bothering me in your situation and I know its bothering you is why does she not reply to your e-mail or text....maybe she has moved on....does this mean you should do the same, or should you find out as my mom would say "from the horses mouth" which means maybe call her and see if there is a future for you guys....I know everyone is saying NC, but with NC you are not moving on, you might need to here from her so that you can have closure or that there is a chance....I dont know I might not giveing you good advice right now....what do the rest of you guys/gals think? I know you all are thinking NC but I dont know if its helping in this situation.....my thinking does kodiak's ex knows how he feels about her?...or has she moved on with someone else and kodiak has to heal like the rest of us?

 

Atlous---any more news? You are playing it real good right now, let us know whats going on....

 

WantanS4-- how are you keeping up with the healing, I hope all is well with you....I am glad you doing good...

 

As for me I my life is getting better, got an investor to look at my business plan and he liked the idea, so he told me to fix a couple of things and he will try to peddle my idea and see what happens.....Its a start for me....I still miss her...and I know that I dont have to call her or do anything now more...its up to her and I am feeling ok with that....I saw that nick14 said it would be nice if he had someone for the holydays.....I was thinking that would be a nice thought for all of us....we never know I hope it does happen for us...well we need to heal and I think we are all slowly getting there...

 

One thought this post is getting big and I dont know if the moderator will kill it when it reaches 700...i have seen them kill a 700+ post.....I was wondering if the moderator is reading this post, not to kill it...the guys/gals here need this and we all need to see it to the end, we got rid of DUGs, and i know we will get rid of a few more soon...

if they kill this one guys....I will just make a part2 up....hopefully we dont lose anyone in the process....

 

take care

[djones]

Weird,

 

Its a damn shame that most people act like our exs, confused runawayers....how can you find someone with huge population of people thinking like our ex's.....the end result is that we get hurt...what makes me hesitant in dating again is that I will end up heart broken again.....you start to grow a thick skin and then what happens when you find someone that really does care for you...you may end up losing them b/c of past bad relationships.....its a double edge sword....

[Weird]

Yep.

 

I have lost almost all my faith/desire in being with someone assuming my ex didn't wake up one day realizing she is being silly with running away and we get back together. The good thing though is I like being single right now as I have time to do whatever I want and don't have someone nagging me. I would get back with my ex if she showed me she has grown up emotionally (I do truly love her) but other than that, unless something magical happens and the greatest girl ever that I didn't think coudl exist drops in my lap from the sky, I plan to stay single.