its a lifestyle Posted February 11, 2013 Share Posted February 11, 2013 I think about this often, and just decided to come and put it into words here for you guys... 21, first real love, first real loss... it hit me HARD to say the least, I'm 7 months into the healing process, Reflecting on what I've learned from the whole thing, I can say this... Despite the irrational thoughts of women being cold & heartless witches, never letting my guard down again, never allowing myself to become so emotionally involved with another women, from now on I'll do the heartbreaking, etc etc etc... The real lesson, and the one I can truly live by and guarantee is: Dignity I lost enough of it the first time, and I am 100% certain that I will never lose any more of my dignity for as long as I live. If I ever do fall in love again, and if it's not enough for the girl I fall in love with... that will be her problem and her loss, I'll instantly cut her out of my life, Trying to stay in contact, grasping straws with the "friends concept", letting her know how much I'm hurting, clinging onto hope, all of those things do nothing but delay the process of healing and moving on... You just KNOW when it's over for real, the differences between an argument and saying it's over in the heat of the moment, and knowing when the relationship truly is over are clear to see if you look deep enough... At that point, I'll now know it's time to completely cut the connection from day 1, no matter how hard it is, I'll know that in the end it will save me from extra hurting, and I'll be left with a clear mind and my dignity intact. It's "closure" which makes this difficult... but I've learned that closure is the fact that they're no longer with you, the reason why is irrelevant, and if you do demand it... no reason they give will EVER been good enough, they're gone, they're no longer with you, that's the closure. If I could go back in time and change 1 aspect of the entire relationship from beginning to break-up, the only thing I would do is keep my dignity, I would have never wrote that letter, I would have never shed a tear in front of her, I would have never told her that I love her after hearing her say it's over... At least now I know for the future. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
inforests Posted February 11, 2013 Share Posted February 11, 2013 I just wanted to express my gratitude for your post. I want you to know that there is someone out there in the world that appreciates it and benefitted from it. Thank you again. Link to post Share on other sites
Sav Posted February 11, 2013 Share Posted February 11, 2013 Great post Glad to see you taking it well and having a sense of pride. Know that this post will help and inspire alot of poor broken souls out there Link to post Share on other sites
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