Replaced

[1money3]

My husband came back from a IRAQ and decided he no longer wanted to be married. We have been married for 13 years. I have been faithful and supportive throughout our marriage and do not know what I have done to make him leave. I have begged, pleaded, and asked him to go to counseling. But he said he has been unhappy for 12 1/2 years!

 

 

He has moved out of our house and moved into an apartment where he has met a servicewoman and in which he has decided to help her out with her son. We also have a child together in which he stops by twice a week to see him. He does not want to go to counseling and stated that I need to move on and he that he didn't ask me to support him! He called me drunk on our wedding anniversary told me he loved me but he didn't want to have to answer to anyone and he didn't want any responsibilities. After he tells me all of this, a woman gets on the phone and tell me that he does not love me because he was with her. I was shocked!

 

Since then, he has filed for divorce and we have a court date for the beginning of September. I feel like I have been replaced and used. We are currently living in California (where he is currently station). I do not have any family out here and would like to move home. However, he is telling me that he will not allow me to move his son out of the state. In order for me to move, I have to give him a 45 notice and get consent from him. He will returning to IRAQ in January. He stated he wants the divorce to be over ASAP. Can someone give me some advice?

[RowanRavyn]

Is he giving you child support? If not call his CO.

 

Also, you have a right to go back to your home of record. That is where he will be dismissed to when he leaves the military. I would seek assistance from a lawyer. If you do not have the money for a lawyer, seek something through legal aide.

 

Also, judges here in CA tend to favor the mom. Let the judge know that he will be returning to Iraq to "serve his country" and that you would like to return to your home of residence so that your family and friends can be there for you and your son.

 

Let him go in to the judge full of testostarone, and nastiness. If you state things as you did here, calmly and with no accusations, most likely the judge will knock him down a notch or two.

 

And, in the military adultery is still illegal. If you can prove it, and convince JAG to pursue it, he might find himself in Levineworth(sp?) instead of Iraq.

[ready2moveon26]

He will NOT go to Leavenworth...they'd rather send him to Iraq to get killed than pay for him to spend time in Leavenworth! Do what you gotta do...get out...he's a jerk...In my opinion...a lot of girls only go into the service for sex...they don't care when if the men they're with are married or not...think about it...if you were in Iraq with a girl that wants to have sex with you...what would you do? I am not defending him because I would NEVER defend a man...but cut your losses and take your child...he can see the child when he gets back...that is...if he gets back.

[RowanRavyn]

Make sure that what you do is LEGAL.

 

Consult a lawyer. Iraq might be the best place for him, but you still have to CYA.

[1money3]

Thanks for the advice. I have retained a lawyer and went to court on September 1st. I asked for permission to move out of the state with my child. The court gave us a cooling off period for 6 months in which we would have to return to court. However, my ex-husband will be in IRAQ. I am trying to find out from my lawyer if my ex's lawyer can speak on his behalf. Anyway, I am currently working looking for a job in Atlanta. As soon as I find one, I will consultant my lawyer on filing legal document with my final request again! Hopefully, our divorce will be over in the next six months period!