Seperated 3 weeks, want her back, wife hurting me!

[123pgjes]

Am, what do you mean? What do you suggest I do exactly?

[123pgjes]

She left 2 months ago today.

 

The application to court to get the kids 2 days a week at least is done, awiting filing.

 

Im scared to file. She wont talk, won't listen, I am just left without options and need to file.

 

I still want to work on the marriage, I want us to get 3rd party help, anything it takes but she will not talk, wants to separate but won't let me have the kids.

 

I think that she may even capitulate and come back if I file.

 

Thoughts guys?

[Darth Vader]

I can tell you what your problem is? Your married to a paranoid, freaking nut case that your in love with! This t'ain't no functional relationship/marriage. It hasn't ever been one and its never going to be one. The two of your are simply incompatible. She's the one with the mental/emotional issues, and is in need of help.

 

And to be honest with you? I would be getting sole custody of those kids quick, fast and in a hurry like ~ and I would use any and all mean possible and available to do so. Simply because as you've described her? I think she's mentally and emotionally unstable. And that she's so possessive that she would potentially do them in rather than see you have them?

 

And I hate to tell you what your fronting as 'love' ain't no love at all. Its obsession. In your post all you could offer up to us was that she was a HBX10 back in tha' day. If that's your small criteria for selecting a Life Mate then you need to think again?

 

You can take the Hottest Babe there is? And I can absolutely promise you I can find at least one if not more men that are tired of sleeping / having sex with her ~ and all the more? Tired of putting up with her crap! (OK? Rachel Welch might be the exception because she was, and even in her Golden Years is still a HB, plus she's got morals, scruples, a strong religious foundation, a good entrepreneur, invested her money, made some good solid business and money decision that would make Dave Ramsey blush? She managed her career and life such to stay out of the tabloids, gossip columns ~ She's a pretty awesome person, individual, woman. Read up on her bio.)

 

Mrs Gunny has a DIL who played that crap on her son, about putting conditions on their marriage after the fact. Threatening divorce is you don't do X, Y and Z?

 

Let me tell you! You won't pull that crap on me BUT one TIME! And the first time you do? It will be your last time! :mad: :mad: If what I've got to offer, bring to the table isn't good enough for ya? Then you can take you wants, needs, desires, and shove them on down the line! :eek: :mad: I'll be damned to Hell and go play poker for the rest of eternity with the Devil himself before a spend a single lifetime trying to satisfy some woman's 14K mind. Trying to pacify what can't be pacified? Satisfied what can be satisfied! If what I've got to offer and bring to the table isn't good enough for yur' happy azz! Guess what! There's tha' door don't let the door hit ya' where the Good Lord split ya! See ya! Hate to be ya! And God pity the poor miserable SOB that ends up with ya!

 

The XHEX? (I've only been married once other than to Mrs. Gunny ~ and I was single for 23 years before she came along ~ and it took her eight of those to get me on board with her) She's one of those that's not only wanted to divorce me as her husband but wanted to replace me as the Father of our children.

 

You divorce this gal, and I can promise you that she's going to do everything she can to alienate you from your kids. Everything you do is wrong, everything you don't do is wrong, everything you say will be wrong! Everything you don't do will be wrong. You could be Jesus Christ Himself, and she would still find fault with you! As a person, an individual,

she and her family will and are going to find fault with you. Been there and done that. Got the poster, the picture, the post cards, the beer mug, the coffee cup and the damn key chain! :mad: :mad:

 

She's the one with the mental and emotional issues ~ and she's seriously gas lighting you into thinking and others that you're the one with the issues, having to defend yourself, your life, your every word and deed! WTF? :mad:

 

You best wake up to a serious reality check ~ quick, fast and in a damn hurry like and quit kissing her azz, worshiping the ground she walks on, the air she breathes! You best wake up and snap out of your cheap s***! Because I'm here to testify! Standing up with my hands and arms raised to God Himself! Your keep climbing your happy azz up on the Lover's Cross? Making a scarifical lamb out of yourself (Which is what your doing BTW) and your going to find yourself in one world of HURT!

 

Don't do it for me! Hell don't do it for yourself!

 

Do it for the mental, emotional, pyschological development and well being of your CHILDREN.

 

Time to "Man-Up" and to Lawyer-Up and to quit being a supplicating, azz-kissing, fool over a damn piece of azz!

 

 

First off! Read this 10 more times!

[Darth Vader]

Her best friend called me.

 

Said that she had a breakdown. Could not cope with the twins and just lost it for a while.

 

Said that her family have more or less influenced her actions of late.

 

Sad really, I think it is time to break the non communication rule and send her an email about how I feel and give her time.

 

If it is splitsville, then I will attend court and get contact with the kids, and move on.

 

Easier said than done obviously.

 

Document the DAMN breakdown! And Divorce her ASS!

[123pgjes]

horrible day today.

 

Grand father passed away. I was very close to him, he lived with me until I moved out at 28.

 

Just keeps getting better.

 

Well, think this week I will file application in court for the kids.

 

I have tried to be mr nice guy, tried to appease her, give her time, 180 and the like, now its time to just unload.

 

Hurts me so dam much, she means so much to me, the children are my life. I never wanted to be separated from them.

 

I will lodge the application this week, one of two things will occur.

 

1. She capitulates and comes back with the kids.

 

2. I get contact with the kids, she will be assessed and there may be mental issues apparent.

 

I just hate this life. Not that I am showing it too her, but she knows me, she knows I am hurting. Regardless of her actions and what she shows, shes very good at being poker faced.

[NYWoman]

Go for full custody!

 

Have her evaluated, she is not healthy and growing kids need a healthy environment.

 

They are too young to fight for themselves, so it is up to you

[123pgjes]

Very true.

 

I spent yesterday filling out the supporting application and affidavit for court to see the kids. I flicked it to my Barrister to look over, meeting him Thursday to discuss and file.

 

I am putting the house on the market, having the proceeds of sale put into a trust account pending a final hearing.

 

In the meantime, I will cancel her insurance on her car and sign the title over in her name.

 

Pay the required child support per week and spend more $ on the kids when I get them.

 

Until court, I will agree to supervised contact, as that is what she is proposing and only accepting ATM, begrudgingly.

 

It will be a shock and awe campaign, Reality of being at home with an unemployed grandfather and stay at home grandma, with the wife on $700 a week to raise 2 kids will settle soon enough.

 

Benefit I guess waiting this long, the money she took out of the account, will more than likely be minimal now as her family spend money like a pack of drunken sailors. Let alone legal $, as she is a lawyer, but never practiced in court. She has gone to some feminist law firm nearby, known to bill a lot, but do little. Even they said to my lawyer she is very difficult to say the least.

 

I need to do it for the kids, a second, for my marriage.

 

I will get the kids, but will it save my marriage?

 

One of lifes many speed humps.

[Darth Vader]

Very true.

 

I spent yesterday filling out the supporting application and affidavit for court to see the kids. I flicked it to my Barrister to look over, meeting him Thursday to discuss and file.

 

I am putting the house on the market, having the proceeds of sale put into a trust account pending a final hearing.

 

In the meantime, I will cancel her insurance on her car and sign the title over in her name.

 

Pay the required child support per week and spend more $ on the kids when I get them.

 

Until court, I will agree to supervised contact, as that is what she is proposing and only accepting ATM, begrudgingly.

 

It will be a shock and awe campaign, Reality of being at home with an unemployed grandfather and stay at home grandma, with the wife on $700 a week to raise 2 kids will settle soon enough.

 

Benefit I guess waiting this long, the money she took out of the account, will more than likely be minimal now as her family spend money like a pack of drunken sailors. Let alone legal $, as she is a lawyer, but never practiced in court. She has gone to some feminist law firm nearby, known to bill a lot, but do little. Even they said to my lawyer she is very difficult to say the least.

 

I need to do it for the kids, a second, for my marriage.

 

I will get the kids, but will it save my marriage?

 

One of lifes many speed humps.

 

FORGET the marriage, GET THE CHILDREN OUT OF THERE!

[123pgjes]

Well

 

I filed for property and children orders last Friday afternoon.

 

Now awaiting the fallout.

 

Atm, I have started dating. It feels good to do so, nothing serious as I do not think I am in the right head space.

 

I still miss her terribly at times, but the massive depression I had has slowly flowed away.

[2.50 a gallon]

Dating, good for you. You are right nothing too serious. Our egos take such a serious hit, just finding out that you are still attractive to the opposite sex just seems to light up that dark pit we have been thrown into.

 

Have you been able to see your kids?

[123pgjes]

Still no contact with the kids. Letters to her lawyer go ignored by her.

 

Her power trip is slowly coming to an end though.....

[2.50 a gallon]

danny351

 

How is it going?

[123pgjes]

I am great at my job, aced my degree, just when it becomes personal, I did try everything to not go to court.

 

I can sleep at night knowing I tried to be mr nice guy with her.

 

I am doing well, just now her lawyer is no accepting service of he documents, so clearly she is out of $.

 

I currently have a process server after her.

 

The matter is listed for first return date next month.

See what happens.....

[thomashome]

Did you file a divorce? What your wife said when she did not allow you to see the kids? Just wondering some people believe their partners have mental problems even though they have a proof that they don't have mental issues.

 

People (incl my husband) just refuse to learn how to interact and communicate with their loved one. They live in their own world. Frustrating.

[123pgjes]

Me being depressed when she left = mental issues apparently.

 

Only thing she hangs onto.

 

Not filed for divorce, in Australia we need to be separated for 12 months before we can.

 

I filed to see kids and property settlement.

[123pgjes]

Well her lawyer accepted service of the documents.

 

I trust I will her back from them soon.

 

I have demanded to see the kids immediately supervised if need be, to see the kids and also to look good for the courts and to make her look unreasonable.

 

Waiting is starting to annoy me now. Work and other facets of my life are going well. Cannot wait to start my life again.........

[thomashome]

Hi

 

Have you seen your kids yet?

[123pgjes]

No

 

I actually even arranged to see the kids at a supervised centre, paid by me and all, gave all my available dates, no reply as yet.

 

My Lawyer sent her lawyer that letter days ago.

 

Complete head in the sand..........

[123pgjes]

Hello

 

I filed 2 further affidavits this week to court from family members willing to assist with the children.

 

To save $ I went over to the court to file myself.

 

I asked the registry of the family court if she filed anything. Nothing filed.

 

I picked up the mail from our matrimonial home, her mail is still going there.

 

She is ignoring everything.......

 

If you look at it globally, all she has done is left with the kids, took her clothes and some money out of the account. She thinks I may not have fought for the kids or just ignored the situation.

 

Now after trying to resolve the matter amicably, I am being extremely proactive and I think she is rattled.

 

I doubt her family even know about the court proceedings.

 

Knowing her, if I call her and ask her to talk about it, she will think I am using the court action to get her back, causing another argument which may result in a restraining order or just another point in the affidavit to use against me.

 

It feels good to take her power from her. The kids are everything to me.

[123pgjes]

She is still ignoring everything..........

[123pgjes]

Well court is tomorrow.

 

She has completely ignored my application in court to see the children and regarding the home.

 

Since the children were born she never allowed me to be alone with them. She demanded that my family have no time with them. Since separating for 3 months now, I've seen them for 6 hours supervised at her cousins place. I have asked to see the kids supervised for the last two weeks just to see them.

 

After all this, she has ignored the court application giving me 50/50 for the kids.

 

Has she had a change of heart after all this? Doubt it.

 

Or is she planning something?

 

I think she thought I would use it as a ploy to get her back.now that I have not called, she may realize reality.

[Shocked Suzie]

Well court is tomorrow.

 

She has completely ignored my application in court to see the children and regarding the home.

 

Since the children were born she never allowed me to be alone with them. She demanded that my family have no time with them. Since separating for 3 months now, I've seen them for 6 hours supervised at her cousins place. I have asked to see the kids supervised for the last two weeks just to see them.

 

After all this, she has ignored the court application giving me 50/50 for the kids.

 

Has she had a change of heart after all this? Doubt it.

 

Or is she planning something?

 

I think she thought I would use it as a ploy to get her back.now that I have not called, she may realize reality.

 

good luck Dan, hope it goes ok

[123pgjes]

Seems I spoke too soon.

 

Apparently she is filing today, a day before court. Asking for supervised contact that I am a threat to my children.

 

So angry right now, she won't get it, the court will belt her.

 

Knowing her, she probably thought I would call her trying to get her back, now, I have remained silent, she had to act and waiting till the 11th hour to serve documents. It's 11.43 am here in Sydney, by the time I get served it will be the afternoon.

 

Won't look good tomorrow for her.

[thomashome]

Do you still want to be married with her? Seems you guys haven't done filing for a divorce yet.

[123pgjes]

Do you still want to be married with her? Seems you guys haven't done filing for a divorce yet.

 

You need to separated for 12 months in Australia before you can get divorced.

 

However I did send her the papers to sign, she didn't sign them.

 

Court yesterday was up and down. Was only the first court date, agreed to sell the home.

 

However by the time other matters in the list were dealt with, we could not really get up to argue ours, so matter adjourned till next month.

 

Gladly, a matter came before the courts that we witnessed. Two young parents, mum made full admissions to suicidal actions, notes, got assessed under the mental health act. Dad wanted supervised contact with her and their child, he didn't get it. My wife saw this and cried at the back of the courtroom. She then knew I guess that she can't get supervised.

 

Sad day in all, she looks horrible.

 

Her affidavit in reply to mine was compete rubbish and clearly drafted at the 11th hour. I spent 2 hours drafting up an affidavit in reply to hers and had it filed yesterday morning, counter acting her argument at every junction.

 

My affidavit has evidence, hers does not.

 

I will get the kids next time, just a matter of how long.