cottom Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 With modern technology, everyone is just a click away. And this current "lad" culture of wanting to have sex with everything that moves and sayings such as "just because there is a goalie don't mean you can't score". First partner, she constantly had boys texting her, hitting on her, coming up to her. She left me for a guy she was texting, that she said was 'just friends' with. She left after 2 years together. Second partner, she had boys constantly meeting up with her and taking her out for meals just "as friends". She then left me and got back with her ex after 2 months of us. Then a few weeks later she left him for one of the guys she was meeting while with me. Third and latest partner, we were together for 2 years. She was constantly having guys come up to her, she was at uni and guys came and called for her on a daily basis, she insisted they were just friends but in the end she fell for the one kid and left me for him after 2 years. The point that im trying to say is when im with a girl i just now see that she has a lot of other guys talking to her, i get untrustworthy and leave it and dont take the meeting up and getting together any further. Girls always seem to be looking at other guys when they also have a partner, especially when they are early 20's like me. All i want is a relationship like my parents, grandparents, great grandparents etc where they met around 20 and fell in love and stayed together. But girls are always looking for better and when were together she will see my bad and good, guys flirting just show off their good so i seem worse off. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
thesaka24 Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 I got you bro. Yea its crazy but think on that like this. 1.You just happen to have some greedy girls in your life 2.You didnt lose sh*t , what did you lose ? They lost someone who loved them, each one of them.You lost nothing, only some time, but you now have experience. Don't be afraid of pain. And in every relationship where you date other person, that other person can leave at any time , right ? Just as you can too...Just like one in 2 y relationship, because she doesn't owe you nothing,she Can fall in love with other guy, only "love" bonds you, but if you marry a girl , then its a different story. But I think it sucks, I mean hey, if I have been with you for 2 y, I'm saying this from your perspective, was that for nothing? You gonna throw that away just like that ? Girl you are not worth of my time anymore, arivederchi In relationships its all about trust and talking, make a deal, you can do this, you cant do this, or we are through. Dont let girl pull your nose.There is always better girl, and your soul mate OK ? Now cheer up and go find an awesome , nice , good girl Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 Before you can trust a girl, you have to trust yourself. You have to trust that you will be OK no matter what she does. You have to trust that you will always use the information you have to make the best decision for yourself. You have to understand that someone is either trustworthy or they aren't, and no amount of worrying, jealousy, or control on your end will stop someone from cheating or leaving if that is what they want to do. When you meet a new girl, she is either someone who is trustworthy and wants to build a long-term relationship, or she is someone who is NOT trustworthy, but flighty and prone to jumping from relationship to relationship. You have no control over what kind of person she is, so part of building a relationship is learning what kind of person she is. It's not just about other guys... it's about her entire character. What's her relationship like with her family and friends? Is she an honest person? (You don't see her stealing, lying, etc.) Does she do what she says she's gonna do? You take all this information you gather, and you SLOWLY let trust build-up. For everything you see her do that shows her integrity, you know you can trust her a little more. Until she earns trust, DON'T trust her. But that doesn't mean worrying and controlling and fretting every time she talks to a boy. Again, it means knowing that if she crosses the line with someone else, you'll respond in the way that's best for you. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 (edited) I am sorry you have had it rough, but you as another poster suggested have learned something from what has happened to you, not all "girls" are like that, but the essence of the problem here is the word "girls"...using the word girls implies immaturity...... You are wantign a mature relationship maturity is not lookign for greener grass, when girls becoem women they figure this out if they are good at heart level.If they dont give a crap and walk around with ice in their hearts, they keep searching while in a relationship for that greener grass, and sometimes girls like boys never grow up does technology make it easier to do this??????....for sure BUT even if that technology wasnt in existence which it is so the point is really moot........their mode of operation would be to still go looking for something different.....i feel in a loving serious relationship texting other guys should stop, your partner should be able to answer your phone and have met or know of the person on the other end of it...or yell hey you got a message and be able to read it without having heart failure,no secrets, means no deceit....... technology has been built that people abuse for the reasons of secrets and deceit, it can be so positive but the negative connotations are the variable that turns it ugly...its a matter of maturity,it shouldnt be..... you cant look at it its mine...mine...mine....dont look at it or ill kill you..and .it should be hey can you see who sent me that text it might be important........a serious relationship shouldnt have secrets....deb Edited February 14, 2013 by todreaminblue 1 Link to post Share on other sites
thesaka24 Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 @pteromom dude, you are totally right, you rock Link to post Share on other sites
Darren Steez Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 Seems to me you're attracted to the same kind of chick. Always on the phone, talking to many guys..which included you at some point when you started courting. Not all women are the same. There are trustworthy women out there, just have to find them. Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 @pteromom dude, you are totally right, you rock Yes, she is spot on. So is Darren. Become outcome independent ... and learn to use ppl as well. Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 Yes, she is spot on. So is Darren. Become outcome independent ... and learn to use ppl as well. That's OK. I'm a mom... I'm OK with teenagers calling me dude. Link to post Share on other sites
thesaka24 Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 That's OK. I'm a mom... I'm OK with teenagers calling me dude. I'm sorry, I didn't check your gender, my bad Link to post Share on other sites
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