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Does this look bad?


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I've been on a couple of dates recently with a guy I met whilst temping. Last week, a girl I used to work with at the same job, invited me out for drinks (the week I left I said I'd have to catch up for drinks sometime because I didn't have the opportunity to before I left). I told her that if it was staff drinks, I didn't want to come because I don't want to gatecrash (especially because I've been out on a couple of dates with a staff member). She gave me the impression that there would only be a few people, including some people who didn't work there. Anyway, there were a lot of staff there....

 

My problem now is that I'm worried that it now looks like I was making myself welcome amongst all his workmates. A few people from his work knew that the two of us were going out for drinks on my last day there. When they asked me how things were, I didn't tell them anything they didn't already know e.g. we went out for drinks and had a nice time. They didn't press for information, thankfully and I didn't bring him up in conversation.

 

I'm just worried how this might all look from his point of view.

 

I feel embarrassed because (a) I was led to believe that only a few people that I wanted to catch up with would be going; and (b) I found out that night that someone mentioned to him that I would be there, so from his point of view, it would appear that I knew it was staff drinks. He didn't go because he hasn't been well (and for all I know because he didn't want staff to hound him about me being there too...some of them can be a bit immature).

 

He's had some pretty bad dating experiences in the past. We get along great and I don't want him to read into anything.

 

Am I overreacting?

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i think u might be over reacting... i know how that is because sometimes ido something and i think its embaracing and i cant stop feeling insecure about it... it haunts you...

 

i think yoiu need to relax.... even if inside you are churning, dont let it show. its not that big a deal... lets say u were ti show up wherever he was all the time then i would understand why he wouldnt think u might be stalking hmi... but once is not a big deal. maybe you shoud talk to him and casually mention how the girl told u it wasnt a big staff event and so u were surprised....

 

if u get into a rship with him... u could be honest and tell him how u wer escared and you can laugh about it together..

 

if he goes psycho from this then i would say you ar ebetter off without him anyway...

but fornow u can vent to us whenever you need.... and i wouldnt let this get to you too muhc :)

 

good luck and take care

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