disidente Posted February 16, 2013 Share Posted February 16, 2013 I had an intense emotional and physical affair with a MW last October that lasted two months until she moved away. She had fallen out of love with her husband and we shared more in common than he and her ever did so we were already talking children and future plans (after they broke up). Her husband had become frustrated with the lack of results from marriage counseling and had started to shut down. He confronted her a few times, asking her outright if she wanted a divorce. She couldn't say 'yes' to his face as they had been together for about ten years (no children). Around the time she moved away her husband also found out about the affair and they are since working on things. I wrote her a last email saying I hope it all works out for the best and I'm sorry (I wasn't) and all that jazz, even though I'm still in love with her. So this is the thing: we've started talking again pretty consistently for the past two months. We skype every free moment and we even have skype sex. She tells me that she is commited to her marriage (or at least wants to be) and that she loves her husband (or at least wants to stay with him). I'm not 100% happy with that and I've expressed it but there doesn't seem to be anything I can say that will get her to divorce him. I'm also afraid that if i were to tell her husband about everything it still wouldn't be enough for him to divorce her and then me and her would really end. I don't want that yet. So, yes, I'm still emotionally involved and I'm not even able to properly have fun with the situation. I pressure her a lot looking for verbal expressions of affection. And she gives plenty but they aren't enough because I guess what I'm looking for is "I'm leaving my husband for you". Not gonna happen. Eventually I will have to go NC but I'm not in a good place for it yet. I'll be moving soon to a new job and there are more women in that area so I guess it'll be easier then. In the meantime, I need a game plan. I want to have fun with whatever is left and not pressure her so much that I push her away and, who knows? Maybe even leave the groundwork for us having something real later (though it'd be better if I don't think about that at all). Our plan so far is to meet up at some unspecified moment in the future and **** each other's brains out, possibly on several occasions, and until I get married (or properly in love with someone else). It's stupid, I know. But we are both looking forward to it and I need to figure out how to manage my emotions and my expectations better so that we can actually pull this off. Has anyone here been in a similar situation? Any insights on how to actually enjoy it until it's over? Thanks to all. Link to post Share on other sites
Author disidente Posted February 16, 2013 Author Share Posted February 16, 2013 Those three posts of his are the same BS story in three different sections. Don't give this troll the satisfaction. NervisPervis, I did post the story in three different sections but only because I assumed there would be a different take from different audiences. I know there are people who frequent several sections and might find this to be poor etiquette but I assure you my intent is not to troll. Having said that, the fact that this seemed to scream "TROLL" to you should be a sign to me of how silly my situation is. I'm just having a hard time being strong and just enjoying it for what it's worth. I hope you come back and give me your take on this, and again I apologize for the poor etiquette. I am his married lover. I want to get rid of him. Can anybody please tell me how? Hmm... well, maybe you shouldn't call me every morning when your husband is at work and maybe we shouldn't have phone sex. Seriously though, I think she could be getting close to this. I just need some advice from somebody that's gone through this before. How the h3ll do I play it cool?! Again, thanks and no, I don't mean to troll the forum or its members. Link to post Share on other sites
Darren Steez Posted February 16, 2013 Share Posted February 16, 2013 troll:laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
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