Why do some women think their age is so sacred to tell?

[e40]

... on the initial profile. Yes... but before they met.

 

I bet there are things he's fudging about too. Yet he feels entitled to an answer about this... mostly to satisfy his ego.

 

What a joke.

Lying on a profile is deceitful whether a man or woman.

[RedRobin]

You didn't answer the question. She lied about her age and smoking habits.

 

That was some other woman... not the one he was originally talking about.

 

I don't know about this other woman (the one he saw smoking)... she could have picked smoking back up later. Who knows?

 

That is why people take time to get to know others. Big deal... and why I don't do OLD anymore.

[RedRobin]

Lying on a profile is deceitful whether a man or woman.

 

It's called marketing. The OP is gonna have to dig real deep to prove to me he doesn't hold some things back that are more private.

 

Different things are important to different people. Again, why I don't do OLD. In real life, I have a better sense of the things people keep secret and things they are upfront about.

 

The little secrets that grease the wheels of social conduct... no worries. There are big secrets that people doing OLD keep that are much more harmful than a woman fibbing about her age so she can make it into the search engine.

 

Oh, like lying about looking for a relationship, lying about being single, or not stating their dating intentions.

[e40]

That was some other woman... not the one he was originally talking about.

 

I don't know about this other woman (the one he saw smoking)... she could have picked smoking back up later. Who knows?

 

That is why people take time to get to know others. Big deal... and why I don't do OLD anymore.

Both lied about their age. Their's a slight possibility she just picked back up smoking.

 

People should take the time to get to know others, but in a dating situation someone should know the age of the person they are dating very early on. There's a reason OLD sites make age mandatory.

[e40]

It's called marketing. The OP is gonna have to dig real deep to prove to me he doesn't hold some things back that are more private.

 

Oh, like lying about looking for a relationship, lying about being single, or not stating their dating intentions.

Deceptive advertising would be a better term. Some lies are worse than others. No one is disputing that.

[RedRobin]

Deceptive advertising would be a better term. Some lies are worse than others. No one is disputing that.

 

yea, well, the OP needs to pick his battles...

[RedRobin]

Both lied about their age. Their's a slight possibility she just picked back up smoking.

 

People should take the time to get to know others, but in a dating situation someone should know the age of the person they are dating very early on. There's a reason OLD sites make age mandatory.

 

OLD sites do whatever makes them money... now I need to 'unplug' from LS and go make some money myself!!

 

;P

[irc333]

And the profile is a lie.

 

Refusing to tell? Maybe not a lie but still just a little friggin insane. I would back away and not turn back, myself.

 

Well, funny thing was, I was willing to give her a little time, couple of dates to get used to me. Because I figure that some people do what they do online to get them to meet them face-to-face.

 

Then I figured, "Okay, now that we've met, familiarized ourselves with each other some...now time to ask 'okay, now how old are you....really?'"

 

I never lied about my age, she KNOWS my age, it's only fair that I know her age, right?

Edited February 19, 2013 by irc333

[Emilia]

I never lied about my age, she KNOWS my age, it's only fair that I know her age, right?

 

if you don't want kids then maybe not? after all, it doesn't really matter in that case. I'm pretty sure you could tell if she was 60

[pbjbear]

I didnt read all the replies but this is a no brainer.

 

Women lie about the stuff that men place heavy focus on. Men tend to go for younger women because they are seen as more attractive, so if a woman is older she thinks her chances are better if she lies about her age (and its true anyway...not saying people should lie about this stuff though! but a guy will usually go for the younger female)

Men lie about their income and employment status on OLD sites so its the same thing reversed.

 

The OP isnt super bothered by this because the girl is VERY attractive. If she wasnt VERY attractive he wouldnt be as into her (based on his other threads if this is the same girl, he is focused upon the fact that shes so HOT and giving him the time of day...)

[clia]

Well, funny thing was, I was willing to give her a little time, couple of dates to get used to me. Because I figure that some people do what they do online to get them to meet them face-to-face.

 

Then I figured, "Okay, now that we've met, familiarized ourselves with each other some...now time to ask 'okay, now how old are you....really?'"

 

I never lied about my age, she KNOWS my age, it's only fair that I know her age, right?

 

If she won't tell you, I guarantee she is older than you, and likely by more than just a couple of years.

 

She's within her rights to keep it to herself; you are within your rights to stop dating her if it is that important to you.

[KathyM]

I think people are entitled to know basic information about the people they are dating, if they are investing their time and emotions into a possible relationship. Name, age, marital status, number of children, general health, occupation. That's all very basic information that should not be kept from people that are investing their time, emotions and hopes when dating you. Nobody wants to learn, after investing several dates in a person, that they are much older or much younger than what you were looking for, or that they are not single yet, or that they have kids they didn't mention up front, or that they have some serious disease they did not mention until after several dates, or that they are really flipping hamburgers at McDonalds for minimum wage. Everybody has a right to basic information about the person you are investing time, energy and emotions in dating, and that information should be given up front. Those are potential deal breakers, and I don't think it's fair to string someone along or waste their time pretending to be something you are not, or failing to disclose important, basic information.

[kaylan]

OP, lying is a deal-breaker for me and so is public nudity stuff like Playboy. Id have jumped ship already on the girl youre seeing.

[FitChick]

Since I date middle-aged men, am I entitled to see all of a man's medical test results, not just for STDs but for overall health? After all, I don't want to become emotionally invested in someone who could drop dead of a stroke or heart attack within months. Physical health is far more important than age after you turn 40. Everyone ages at different rates due to lifestyle.

 

If you are younger and want breeding stock, then age is important but there, too, you need to know overall health since plenty of young people are sterile these days.

 

Why do I have a sneaking suspicion that if OP asked this woman her weight, and she declined to answer, that we would have had far, far different replies on this thread? After all, he met this woman so he could see if he was attracted or not, which is the bottom line, is it not? If she was younger than he thought but he wasn't attracted, age would be equally irrelevant.

[kaylan]

Lying is lying. Nuff said folks. Theres no justification in my mind for that kinda stuff early on.

[runningfar]

Since I date middle-aged men, am I entitled to see all of a man's medical test results, not just for STDs but for overall health? After all, I don't want to become emotionally invested in someone who could drop dead of a stroke or heart attack within months. Physical health is far more important than age after you turn 40. Everyone ages at different rates due to lifestyle.

 

If you are younger and want breeding stock, then age is important but there, too, you need to know overall health since plenty of young people are sterile these days.

 

Why do I have a sneaking suspicion that if OP asked this woman her weight, and she declined to answer, that we would have had far, far different replies on this thread? After all, he met this woman so he could see if he was attracted or not, which is the bottom line, is it not? If she was younger than he thought but he wasn't attracted, age would be equally irrelevant.

 

No lying about or refusing to disclose weight would be equally nutty.

 

L

[RedRobin]

Well, I know what I plan to do next time a guy asks my age...

 

...if he has a little belly, I'll look down at it and ask him how much he weighs... If he is (now) slim, I'll ask if he has ever been overweight (I never have been).

 

... I'll ask him how much he makes and if he's willing to bring a pay stub to our next date or his last credit card statement (better be zero!).

 

Whatever it takes to get the point across and put him on the spot. I imagine there must be something he would get queezy about answering. My credit is spotless, I've never been overweight, my credentials are impeccable... If all he cares about is my age... I'll be drilling him on things he probably can't match me on. Not much fun, is it? Fine with me... Not like it would be going anywhere anyway...

Edited February 19, 2013 by RedRobin

[RedRobin]

OP, lying is a deal-breaker for me and so is public nudity stuff like Playboy. Id have jumped ship already on the girl youre seeing.

 

If she told the truth and she was older than him, you'd have ruled her out as 'relationship material' anyway... so it is all the same.

 

Whether she told the truth or not is irrelevant.

[kaylan]

Well, I know what I plan to do next time a guy asks my age...

 

...if he has a little belly, I'll look down at it and ask him how much he weighs... If he is (now) slim, I'll ask if he has ever been overweight (I never have been).

 

... I'll ask him how much he makes and if he's willing to bring a pay stub to our next date or his last credit card statement (better be zero!).

 

Whatever it takes to get the point across and put him on the spot. I imagine there must be something he would get queezy about answering. My credit is spotless, I've never been overweight, my credentials are impeccable... If all he cares about is my age... I'll be drilling him on things he probably can't match me on. Not much fun, is it? Fine with me... Not like it would be going anywhere anyway...

 

Why are you acting like age isnt a factor in choosing a partner? It def is, especially when you have to consider the different life stages people are at in life. I prefer women within 3 years of my age, and I dont like liars either.

 

I dont see the big deal with asking that of someone. It should come up in regular convo fairly easily too. And I dont mind tell a girl my weight or credit. I have nothing to be ashamed of, and I want a woman whos not insecure nor lies either.

If she told the truth and she was older than him, you'd have ruled her out as 'relationship material' anyway... so it is all the same.

 

Whether she told the truth or not is irrelevant.

I wouldnt rule her out if she was within my dateable age range. Im talking to an older girl at the moment now...so spare me.

 

Lying is a deal breaker all the time for me. Its not all the same. Truth is always relevant to me. Im 26, why in the world is it irrelevant to my dating life if a girl is 26 rather than 29? 29 year olds are usually really wanting to settle down and get married soon.

 

Im not at that stage yet. So in what way is lying to me a good idea?

Edited February 19, 2013 by kaylan

[RedRobin]

Im not at that stage yet. So in what way is lying to me a good idea?

 

Because you assume that a 29 year old wants to get married.

 

Assuming someone's values and goals based on their age seems lazy.

[kaylan]

I talked to her about her coming clean about her age, and she says, "I'm old enough to know better, and too young to care."

 

And she threw the, "Don't you know it's rude to ask a woman her age?"

 

I'm like "Um...no, it's not rude, esp. when you're trying DATE them." That's basic information that everyone should know.

NEXT!!!! (10 characters)

[kaylan]

Because you assume that a 29 year old wants to get married.

 

Assuming someone's values and goals based on their age seems lazy.

Ive met enough women to know many do want to settle down. Plenty of women older than me, discount me because of my age, but I dont lie about my age...I go after them anyway.

 

Stop trying to justify LYING. Age matters in relationships. I should know the girls age, and depending on our connection, ill decide if I want to proceed. However, my experience has taught me that I have most in common with women 22 to 28.

 

A great girl will be dumped by me for lying about her age. Her age could easily be of no issue to me in the beginning stages. But once a girl lies to me, especially early on...shes dug her own grave. Honesty means A LOT to me...and Ive been through too much in my dating life to allow dishonesty nowadays. If shed lie about something so small, itd make me think she capable of lying about a lot more.

[RedRobin]

I should know the girls age, and depending on our connection, ill decide if I want to proceed. However, my experience has taught me that I have most in common with women 22 to 28.

 

I have a better idea... she withholds what she wants... and presses you for information... then SHE decides if she wants to proceed. How 'bout them apples?

 

It is too bad the woman the OP is talking about isn't here reading this...

 

instead of even entertaining any of his age-related questions, she needs to be sticking it to him on things he should be coming 'clean' about and is uncomfortable with.

 

Then they can BOTH go home miserable and click on the 'next' button on their OLD site roulette...

[KathyM]

Another must know fact: number of divorces. I wouldn't want to fall in love with a guy and find out later he had been divorced 6 times before. People are entitled to basic information when they are dating you, and I don't see the point in trying to hide it. This information will come out sooner or later. Better it does before you invest a lot of time and emotion into the relationship.

[Locust]

Ive met enough women to know many do want to settle down. Plenty of women older than me, discount me because of my age, but I dont lie about my age...I go after them anyway.

 

Stop trying to justify LYING. Age matters in relationships. I should know the girls age, and depending on our connection, ill decide if I want to proceed. However, my experience has taught me that I have most in common with women 22 to 28.

 

A great girl will be dumped by me for lying about her age. Her age could easily be of no issue to me in the beginning stages. But once a girl lies to me, especially early on...shes dug her own grave. Honesty means A LOT to me...and Ive been through too much in my dating life to allow dishonesty nowadays. If shed lie about something so small, itd make me think she capable of lying about a lot more.

 

I'm no expert with women but if a man is looking to have a family of his own then he will most likely for a young woman in her 20's and below 35 that are still in fertility range. Then some men just like young girls because of their fit bodies. That is my take on why some women would want to lie about their age. Me personally yes, I'm in my mid 20's, and if I want to have kids I'm gonna look for a young woman too.