Need some help writing a card...

[Joe]

I know big deal he's got writers block......

 

Anyway here's what's going on. For the last month I have been kind of seeing this girl whom I am very attracted to. We are not at all on day to day relationship. We see each other once a week or so. When together we hold hands and kiss occassionally. I've known this woman for about 10 years but only a "hi" "bye" relationship. Well I met up with her about a month ago after not seeing her for like 5 years and we had an intimate night together, so that's how this all started.

 

To my question. I went out and bought her a christmas present. I am a spontaneous shopper, when I see something I think someone might like I buy it, I'm not the traditional jewelry and perfume type of guy. What I got her is white full length satin pajamas. They're really cute not sexy. I also got her some lotion. They're all wrapped up and ready to go the problem is the card I screwed it up bad and don't know what to do. I don't want her thinking I got the pj's thinking of her in them and gettin' some nookie, that's what I'm not about. And I don't know how to say this. I said the usual merry christmas..bla bla bla and that I'm glad we have had a chance to get to know one another and I enjoy her company.

 

Should I just leave it at that? Am I just putting a head trip on myself? Everyone that knows me knows I would never buy a gift just to get some nookie. I want something that is short and sweet and tells her that I'm attracted to her and the gift was something I thought she would really like, not something I would like to see her in.

 

Thanks Love Shackers'

 

Joe

[Tony T]

Considering that you just caught up with her after five years of not seeing her, I think your gift is a bit personal. On the other hand, having sex with her was a bit personal too...so what the hell.

 

I don't think you should refer in any way to seeing her more often or whatever in the card. The PJ's will give that message loud and clear.

 

Just write: Wishing you the very best of Christmases

 

Then sign your name. No further words are necessary. Let her figure everything out. If the two of you become more of an item before Christmas, maybe you can add just a little more. If you don't see her much before Christmas, I don't think you should give her this present at all.

 

You say everyone who knows you knows you knows that you wouldn't buy a gift with sex in mind. But this lady doesn't know you that well. Unless you see her a number of times before Christmas, I really wouldn't get her anything because, unless the two of you see each other a lot more often than you have been before Christmas, I guarantee you that you won't be on her shopping list.

 

Ladies PJs are just sexy by nature and a gift you would get for a girlfriend or a lady you know pretty well. If I were you, I would ask some ladies you know about this (don't tell them about the sex), tell them the nature of your relationship with this lady, and ask them for their opinion.

 

Regardless of what you say, I think you've got sex on your mind. Just imagine what she will think.

 

P.S. There are a lot of women I know on a Hi, Bye basis I wish I could get my way with. What's your secret???

[Nic]

I think you're right Tony. Being a girl myself, if a male were to give me pj's (even if we did have sex), i'd feel a little awkward about what he's exactly trying to say here.

 

part of me would wonder if he's just wanting to have a sexual relationship and buying me pj's is a subtle way of him saying that without being disrespectful (even if they're not particularly sexy, i'd be wondering if he wants me to try them on and then continue from there!)

 

part of me would wonder if he's just a genuine sweet guy who thought it was a nice gesture.

 

part of me would wonder if he's a bit more smitten than i thought, which would probably make me back-off if i didn't feel the same way or wasn't sure of my feelings for him yet.

 

buying nightwear is a rather intimate gesture (unless it's from your family who you know would never think of you sexually).

 

i think it also depends on this lady's character. if you know she may not jump to conclusions or read into things, go ahead. but if you're not too sure how she'll react, i'd put the pj's under my bed for a little while longer until i know where things are going. you don't want to get too personal or too full-on too soon. there's plenty of time for that and nothing needs to be rushed.

Considering that you just caught up with her after five years of not seeing her, I think your gift is a bit personal. On the other hand, having sex with her was a bit personal too...so what the hell. I don't think you should refer in any way to seeing her more often or whatever in the card. The PJ's will give that message loud and clear.

 

Just write: Wishing you the very best of Christmases Then sign your name. No further words are necessary. Let her figure everything out. If the two of you become more of an item before Christmas, maybe you can add just a little more. If you don't see her much before Christmas, I don't think you should give her this present at all. You say everyone who knows you knows you knows that you wouldn't buy a gift with sex in mind. But this lady doesn't know you that well. Unless you see her a number of times before Christmas, I really wouldn't get her anything because, unless the two of you see each other a lot more often than you have been before Christmas, I guarantee you that you won't be on her shopping list. Ladies PJs are just sexy by nature and a gift you would get for a girlfriend or a lady you know pretty well. If I were you, I would ask some ladies you know about this (don't tell them about the sex), tell them the nature of your relationship with this lady, and ask them for their opinion.

 

Regardless of what you say, I think you've got sex on your mind. Just imagine what she will think. P.S. There are a lot of women I know on a Hi, Bye basis I wish I could get my way with. What's your secret???