Hey Tony.....

[Joe]

Hi Tony....well I have shown some ladies the gift and they think it would be a great gift. I'm just trying to play it cool with this lady. I kind of have a problem with pouring my heart out too soon in a relationship. So this gift is my way of expressing how I feel about her without spilling my guts to her.

 

Oh and by the way u wanted to know my secret?? Probably the oldest secret in the book (shh don't tell anyone) lots of shots of tequila.....hehehe.

 

Joe

[Tony T]

Well, Joe...go with your gut. You know how long you've known this lady and the nature of the relationship better than I do. But, again, if you don't see her much between now and Christmas, I would just get her a Christmas card and save the PJs for another occasion. You can pour your heart out with a gift just as much as with words.

 

Ask her out often and do things with her before Christmas. Then it would be fine to give her this.

 

You will also have to learn quickly that women, particularly the good ones, much prefer you speak your heart than give them gifts. Now, if a lady is using you, then she will be happy with all the gifts you can shower upon her and you never have to open your mouth.

 

In the long run, you are better off alone than with someone who is using you. Learn to communicate your feelings, at the proper time, with your voice.

 

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!

[Paulie]

(Let me preface this statement by saying that I know you were only half kidding)

 

The thing about the Tequilla...yes, you're right. The probability of succeeding with a girl INITIALLY increases (other things being equal) in direct correlation with the amount of alcohol she has been fed.

 

The problem arises, however...because this can come back to haunt you. Moral implications aside, from a guy's standpoint, this can come back to screw you. If you're just looking for a cheap hookup (which most of us have sought from time to time) then the ramifications CAN be charges of rape. In reality, this almost never never never occurs. I'm just pointing out that over the years, I have become more and more cognizant of this possibility. An intoxicated bit*h can say anything, and the guy will be screwed.

 

As far as persuing a romantic relationship by getting a girl's phone # by feeding her alcohol, well there's problems there too. If she doesn't like you without the alcohol, she gives you her # while under the influence, then when she's sober again...will it really be genuine? Are we really fooling ourselves into thinking somebody wants to be with us? I think the whole thing is set up under phony circumstances. Maybe this is why everybody on this site says that the best place to meet somebody is NOT in a bar. Maybe I'm over-analyzing, but it's my thoughts, and I'm curious what people think.

 

Now, I also want to say that alcohol SHOULD BE USED, by those that can responsibly enjoy it...to HEIGHTEN AN ALREADY FUN EXPERIENCE. Problems arise when people use this powerful drug (which I drink alot of every weekend) to manipulate their own, or somebody else's emotions or experiences.

 

Lastly, I don't care what anybody says, I will take this to my grave...A Lady Wants a Gentleman. A guy that drinks to excess, feeds her alcohol to try to take her home...is not a desirous quality. Personally, I like to treat a girl like a lady, enjoy holding doors for her, etc. I would go so far as to say that a lady who doesn't like these chivalrous (sp?) things is a turnoff to me.

 

Then there's the aforementioned morality issues that I chose to not even get into. That's for each person to decide for him/herself.

 

I don't mean to come off as this militant anti-alcohol freak. I drink maybe two or three nights a week, and I get a real good buzz going at least one of those nights. It's just that I've been on the alcohol/bar/pickup scene for some time now, and wanted to share this with you guys.

 

I apologize to the original poster...this was not directed toward you. You just mentioned something in passing that I chose to elaborate a great deal on.

 

See Y'all

 

Paulie

[Tony T]

Wow, Paulie, you are an absolute repository for information regarding alcoholic intake as it relates to brushes with the opposite sex. And why would that be???

[Nic]

If she doesn't like you without the alcohol, she gives you her # while under the influence, then when she's sober again...will it really be genuine?

NOT IN THE SLIGHTEST!! (ALTHOUGH IT'S EASY TO FOOL YOURSELF WHEN DRUNK)

 

Maybe this is why everybody on this site says that the best place to meet somebody is NOT in a bar. Maybe I'm over-analyzing, but it's my thoughts, and I'm curious what people think.

I TOTALLY AGREE!!

 

Problems arise when people use this powerful drug (which I drink alot of every weekend) to manipulate their own, or somebody else's emotions or experiences.

AGREED!!

 

A Lady Wants a Gentleman. A guy that drinks to excess, feeds her alcohol to try to take her home...is not a desirous quality.

DAMN RIGHT!!!

 

I would go so far as to say that a lady who doesn't like these chivalrous (sp?) things is a turnoff to me.

(ARE YOU SINGLE, BY CHANCE!!! !)

 

Then there's the aforementioned morality issues that I chose to not even get into.

UH HUH.

[Paulie]

Correction, Tony:

 

I am a repository for information on alcohol, and how it does NOT relate to the opposite sex!

[Tony T]

Ooohhhhh sorry, Paulie....I guess too much cranberry sauce for me today!!!

[Tony T]

I think a lot of people get into the bar scene because they are shy or nervous socially. A few drinks loosen them up and make them more courageous in approaching the opposite sex and perhaps a bit more receptive to those approaches.

 

When people drink too much, both sexes I'm speaking of here, their judgement becomes impaired. Everything that Paulie said above is correct. I really don't think a big buzz has any place on the romantic scene and it can be dangerous.

 

Just how bars became such a center for socializing, I'm not sure, except for the reason I mentioned above. People who have a less exagerated fear of rejection or social phobia approach members of the opposite sex in shopping malls, office buildings, restaurants, at church, etc., in a completely sober state of mind and often form meaninful and lasting friendships and romantic relationships.

 

The worst part is that attraction is very state specific. Someone we may be attracted to when we are in a drunken stupor or borderline intoxicated state may very well not be attractive to us at all when we become sober. Everything takes on a new perspective to the degree we are under the influence.

 

Now, back to your post Joe. If you decide not to give those PJs to your gal for Christmas, I'll wear them, OK?

[sparkle]

I've never had any kind of alcoholic drink before.

 

Am I missing out?