Cynda Posted September 1, 2004 Share Posted September 1, 2004 I am a 28 year old woman addicted to online porn. I don't know how my problem progressed so quickly. I look back about 11 years ago and realize that I've always had a sexual addiction. It started when I was about 17 and my boyfriend loaned me some of his father's porn videos. I watch them continuously....over and over again, while pleasuring myself. When I wasn't looking at the videos I was fantasizing about them constantly. A few years later when I got a computer, it was all over. I would view porn for hours and hours. This would interfere with my sleep, spending time with friends, etc. I just could not stop. I ordered a few videos in the mail. Over time I had a pretty nice collection...later I threw them all out when I vowed never to view porn again. And presently, I still struggle with online porn. I am constantly searching for more stimulating images. Downloading movies, etc. I can't stop! I need help and I don't know where to get it. I've deleted all the porn sites from my computer, but the very next day I find myself searching for more. Afterwards, I am left feeling empty, ashamed, and guilty....Most people think that addiction to porn is only a problem with men, but it's not! I want to stop, but I truly cannot. I am becoming more and more depressed. Please help. -Cynda Link to post Share on other sites
Touch_of_Naughtiness Posted September 1, 2004 Share Posted September 1, 2004 Maybe you should seek the help of a psychologist. If it's as bad as you say, maybe you need professional help. Link to post Share on other sites
She's Come Undone Posted September 1, 2004 Share Posted September 1, 2004 There was a story about this on one of the news programs. This one guy gave away his computer to stop. Another man cut the cords literally to his computer and tv and pasted pictures of his family to his tv to remind him of who he was hurting when he watched porn movies. The first guy had tried everything, 12-Step programs, hypnosis, and none of those worked. I feel for you and hope you find the answer. Link to post Share on other sites
fredrolin Posted September 1, 2004 Share Posted September 1, 2004 Cynda, what do you look like? Height? weight? Do you have trouble getting men? Most women have no problem getting sex anytime they want, or do you prefer masturbation and porno? I am a man and believe me, if I could get sex anytime I wanted it would cut down on my masturbation. Link to post Share on other sites
She's Come Undone Posted September 1, 2004 Share Posted September 1, 2004 Originally posted by fredrolin I am a man and believe me, if I could get sex anytime I wanted it would cut down on my masturbation. Yeah RIGHT!!! LMAO Link to post Share on other sites
fredrolin Posted September 1, 2004 Share Posted September 1, 2004 Originally posted by She's Come Undone Yeah RIGHT!!! LMAO Hey baby, I'm getting older. I can only bust so many nuts per day. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Cynda Posted September 2, 2004 Author Share Posted September 2, 2004 Thanks for your support...I think I do need to take the next step and maybe try a 12-step program on my own. I tried to find an internet filter, was not sure which one to install. Any suggestions? At this point of deperation anything is better than nothing... Addiction does not discriminate. It makes no difference your race, gender, appearance, sexual preference, etc. I'm an attractive female. I've been sexually active since high school. I still am sexually active with my partner, but lately, porn has overcome my life. I just don't understand this. The more sexually active I am, the more I want to masturbate...In my case, masturbation is not a substitute for sex. Well I pray that soon I will be delivered from this addiction. Thanks for the support! -Cynda Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted September 2, 2004 Share Posted September 2, 2004 Hi There were some folks who posted links to sites that have information on porn addiction. Here's one http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=134969#post134969 and another http://www.therapyinla.com/articles/article1102.html Best of luck fighting this! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Cynda Posted September 2, 2004 Author Share Posted September 2, 2004 Thanks for the helpful sites Link to post Share on other sites
Blessedman Posted March 6, 2005 Share Posted March 6, 2005 Go to http://www.settingthecaptivesfree.com They should be able to help you. I too have battled addiction to porn, and it is hard to break but it can be done. I will pray for you!! Link to post Share on other sites
AnnaMay Posted March 10, 2005 Share Posted March 10, 2005 I feel for you as the first step to getting toward your goal is recognizing that you have an issue that needs attention. Don't give up!! Link to post Share on other sites
jmargel Posted March 11, 2005 Share Posted March 11, 2005 It could actually be a medical problem (chemical imbalance). You might have such a high sex drive that you are considered to be a nymphomanic. Just that you release to 'porn' instead of sleeping with countless men (which is good). Link to post Share on other sites
JadeStar Posted March 12, 2005 Share Posted March 12, 2005 Heres another link that might be helpful. http://www.secretaddictions.com Best of luck to you Link to post Share on other sites
Silver Tree Posted April 24, 2005 Share Posted April 24, 2005 Pornography is like an empty glass of water It takes account of your thirst Then hands you an empty glass For a while you can drink from this glass Until you are filled with that Hollow empty feeling I've been addicted to pornography in some form for a longgg time as well. I could chuck the computer, but I was addicted before I had a computer. Wish I could break the addiction- and live a fuller more vibrant life--- Sometimes I rise above it- but the undertow of this obsession keeps dragging me back down into a heart numbing fog. I don't know how to break my addiction. What I have tried so far has not worked, so it is time to try something new like this forum.... ....and maybe some professional counseling of some sort---- so I have hope even after all of this time and all of those empty glasses after all Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted April 24, 2005 Share Posted April 24, 2005 I only see porn addiction as a failure to fulfill a huge desire to be pleased sexually by a real man. Find another man and you will be happy! Link to post Share on other sites
Silver Tree Posted April 26, 2005 Share Posted April 26, 2005 Originally posted by RecordProducer I only see porn addiction as a failure to fulfill a huge desire to be pleased sexually by a real man. Find another man and you will be happy! I used to think that finding the right person ( I did) would end my desire to engage in my addictive behavior. But it didn't. This sort of problem has an internal cause that resides with the person who has that particular problem. Being pleased sexually by a real man or woman won't end and addiction to pornography even though that person may be someone you love. What I have found is that any new and particularly interesting experience will distract you for a while, but in the end, if you have not dealt with the core problem it will definitely be back- to haunt, destabilize and splinter you- which has an effect upon the quality of the life you lead and the quality of the intimacy you can experience Link to post Share on other sites
cvann Posted May 4, 2005 Share Posted May 4, 2005 Everyone has there thorn in the flesh.. for some people that thorn is gossip.. for others the love of money.. unfortuately.. porn..sex..anything of that nature is VERYYY hard to break. A constant battle. I have had that battle for a while now.. mainly to sex...and chatting.. LOL... but as time has gone on.. I have found ways to focus my energy in something more productive and positive. For me.. the main thing that I did was pray more.. I know that some people don't wanna hear that.. but praying has helped me grow closer to God and let me know that I am human and that I have to lean on Him more.. b/c this is MY thorn.. researching my past has also helped me to know why I am this way. Fasting... some people fast by not eating food.. I fast by starving my mind the luxury of the net... you have to starve this addiction away.. and it's not easy.. but.. one day at a time.. and you WILL see progress. Link to post Share on other sites
Ifrit Posted June 2, 2005 Share Posted June 2, 2005 I myself am a 21 yr old male and surprise surprise I'm addicted to it too, I started looking at this stuff when I was only 14!, I was too smart for my parents so they never caught me, but little did I know it would become a habit . I suffered early teen depression and anxiety starting from that age, and porn kind of became a way to cope I guess b/c I was painfully shy at school back then, had a rough adolescence and I was always feeling down and porn was obviously exciting and made you feel alive- in other words its a drug, its literally a drug, even more addictive than cocaine- theres research that indicates this! What's worse the images indelibly burn permanently into your brain b/c of the intense emotional excitement which accompanies the images (or stories for females), whereas chemical substances would drain out of your system at the very least. also I mean, come on, being young and being male w/ all the extra testosterone running through its too easy to get addicted-its the male problem- having sex on your mind constantly, ya know it actually becomes a nuisance to be honest. the women flaunt their bodies and then remain cool and quiet; whereas the fellas, seeing this, have to waste time reacting and going through the whole launch sequence of getting heated up, and their minds totally distracted by every revealing woman they see once the switch is "ON", and nowadays women reveal a lot. for men the switch is either "OFF" or "ON", all or nothing, no in between, thats why the men have to be more careful about when to let the switch on b/c once its "ON" its "ON" all the way to maximum. vs. the women who may be "OFF", "minimum ON" , "medium ON", "maximum ON" etc. theres so much more to life than sex, so many more things to think about but inevitably nature again finds a way to pull the guys towards thoughts of sex- I guess it has to do w/ the male's maximizing reproductive strategy of spreading as many genes as possible. I think the only solution is intense punishing exercise so I can burn up all the extra testosterone so none is left to even think about porn- I think I should retake Kung Fu - I had an iron willpower back then when I was taking it, and during that time I strictly avoided porn cold turkey just like that easily. NEVER keep your mind idle, thats when it waits to strike you, because porn is INSATIABLE: IT DOES NOT STOP ONCE YOU GIVE IN TO IT, even though it convincingly gives you that illusion. Now, I go through cycles where for a time I could care less about porn especially if I'm very depressed, and then suddenly I'll go to the other extreme for a while. I'm trying to eliminate it altogether but as you can probably relate to- its tough. you might consider taking antidepressants as they lower the sex urge and correspondingly, the need for porn. according to freud, you could permanently redirect and channel the raw sex impulse (which is essentially the creative drive in its most raw, basal form) into higher creative functions (called sublimation) ie. by making any kind of art, creating music, painting, building crafts etc- this would presumably eliminate the addiction to porn and hold any excessive desire in check. Link to post Share on other sites
rosyangel Posted June 4, 2005 Share Posted June 4, 2005 I'm addicted to sex stories/pornography and masturbation. I'm 16, and I'm a woman. It shocks me the absolute idiocy of this reply.Originally posted by RecordProducer I only see porn addiction as a failure to fulfill a huge desire to be pleased sexually by a real man. Find another man and you will be happy! If only it was that simple....welcome to the real world. That has nothing to do with it, addictions can strike at any time, or person. It doesn't matter how attractive you are, how successful. how 'pleased sexually' you are with your partner. In fact a lot of times, the more beautiful/handsome or successful a person is, the more factor's for addiction. Addiction goes much deeper than the surface problems of being unattractive or sexually pleased. Going from man to man or woman to woman doesn't solve anything. It only increases your risk of disease and misery. The shame is the worst part of this. The feeling that no one would understand. my mother is a devout christian, my father (they're separated) is a (not a practicing one) psychotherapist. I go to church, I attend sunday school, youth group, I love god...but that doesn't make this addiction go away. Help for women who are addicted to pornography/chat/sex is hard to find. In fact almost impossible. I do not think that it is impossible to beat this however. I can understand Cynda. Most of the sites i find on the net are for men, and their hurt spouses. Thats all well and fine, but what about us? The answers aren't pat and simple, and we all want it to be. I look at it this way, we didn't get into this suddenly, it started for me when I was about 4. Yes no joke, I masturbated, I somehow fell into it, I must have touched myself and realized it felt good, i've continued that tradition for 12 years... So it doesn't stop suddenly, I always hate it when I read sites that say you'll always struggle with some degree of temptation, I want to hear that I'll never think of it again. somehow, magically all your troubles will disappear. And this guilt will never again choke me with shame. Link to post Share on other sites
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